Itt: Jow Forums is in a hotel

*goes to breakfast super early and eats all the good stuff*

mm sandvich

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wait for d*nmark to go to sleep, enter his room and thake a messy shit on """"""""" his""""""""" wink chest

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Once I tried browsing Jow Forums in a hotel using the room wifi. I found that the IP had been permabanned for posting cp.

*spills his big gulp on the carpet*

*Calls room service*
Hey, can I get some bacon and hashbrowns with a cup of hot chocolate up to my room? Thanks.
Also bring a bottle of a lube and a box of condoms.

bump

>hangs myself in my room

lmfao this nigga hanging himself hahahahahahah
you aiite potato boy

room service! yes, I'd like to order cola with peanuts, a fishe and an 11 year old girl, please.

I will go to the pool with my Jow Forums frens

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Pools closed

Then I will go and have fun with Lyn

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Fuck lyn

am i staying in the hotel or working in it?

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YEAH THATS EXACTKY WHAT IM GONNA
DO TO THAT SEXY BITCH

I didnt mean it like that

are you the loli I ordered?

On a dark desert Jow Forums, cool pics in my files
Warm smell of memes, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night
There kot stood in the doorway
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself
"This could be Heaven or this could be Hell"
Then kot lit up a candle and it showed me the way
There were anons down the corridor
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the international random
Such a lovely board (Such a lovely board)
Such a lovely kot
Plenty of room at the international random
Any time of year (Any time of year)
You can find it here
Kots mind is Tiffany-twisted, it got plenty of memes
It got a lot of funny, funny anons it calls frens
How they spam in the front page sweet summer GET
Some spam to remember, some spam to forget
So I called up the mod
"Please bring me my over 9000."
He said, "We haven't had that meme here since 2006."
And still those anons are writing from far away
Answer your thread in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say
Welcome to the international random
Such a lovely board (Such a lovely board)
Such a lovely kot
They livin' it up at the international random
What a nice dub(what a nice dub)
Bring your memes
Incels on the front page
An anime girl on the picture
And kot said "We are all just prisoners here, of our own device"
And in the master's chambers
They gathered for the feast
They spam it with their cursors
But they just can't kill the mod
Last thing I remember
I was running for the exit
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
"Relax," said the night mod
"We are programmed to receive
You can check-out any time you like
But you can never leave!

good song

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>snoops on all the internet traffic on the free wifi that isn't encrypted

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Want to gang bang her?

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no... i am not underage or female
but i'm pretty sure most hotels won't serve you lolis

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tut tut user, you should know Loli's are illegal in this place... Give me $50 and I won't tell the boys in blue

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I want a cute teenage boy to serve me in a maid dress

but this is hotel Jow Forums!
whatever, so long as have my cola and fishe a trap maid will do, just bend over the bed and bite the pillow.

Hotel management would like to inform all customers that you must check out before 11am or pay the late checkout fee.

lol wut like I care, but here's a (you) anyway.

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well i can certainly do that. what service do you require?

here is your fishe and here is your coke, with peanuts as requested.
have a good day sir

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*takes the jar of cashews from your minibar

Hey, they're my cashews.

I would like the room service that I requested hours ago

I'm disappointed in your service.

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nope

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rape and murder her

Sorry about the poor service, as compensation please accept this spa session,
Regards, hotel bant management

Health inspector here, I'm shutting this hotel down for violating multiple health protocols, everyone must be evacuated immediately

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Well with all this rape and murder happening in the hotel I think now is a perfect time to sit down and read a book

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Thank you
*goes into spa*
Umm anyone here?

i'm sorry, sir. we have been very busy today.
here is the food you ordered.
and here is.. eveeything else

was the food not to your liking?

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then I expect to see you there later

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having a good time in the hotel
oncloud9.itch.io/jigsawpuzzle
jigsawID hotelbang

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there where no peanut in my cola!

What time do you get off work?
I need to talk to you about....important things...

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whats the wifi password

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really? i'm sure i brought you coke and peanuts. it is a hotel Jow Forums speciality after all...

not until eight, sir
but you could talk to me now if it is urgent

kotid123
no capitals and no spaces

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bro wanna have a drink ?

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I will arrange something for you right away!
Hi, the WiFi code is rateusonTripAdvisor

*drags you into room*
*locks door*
It's quite important indeed~

Sorry we need you to work til 10 tonight, hope that's ok

thanks, this hotel has some pretty nice staff

sure abe

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don't worry I cleared it up with the manager
here's a little tip *winks*

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Nice its really a good hotel
now what will you drink?

which one is it? :c

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Can I have a new rope my last one broke because some cunt didnt make it properly

Fren dont do it
Have a drink with us

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No, I will

But we habe to fight FOR THE IRA
UP THE RA !

But the eu won

Ah, the bar WiFi is the one I mentioned, in your room please use kotid123
What would you like to drink sir?
That's plenty thanks, I'll be over in an hour

it looks like i will have to work late tonight
no breaks either....

of course. no problem....

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You have to keep faith
We will win !

I TOLD ALL YOU FAGS YOU NEED TO EVACUATE, GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!

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SORRY MISTER OK

That's great thanks, if you keep working this hard I'll up your wages!
Excuse me sir please do not shout in the lobby

please, there must be some mistake
the Jow Forums hotel has a 5 star food hygiene rating. we take the safety of our customers very seriously

the food is fine, HOWEVER I did manage to find moldy sandwiches under half the beds and most of the sheets were covered in semen. I saw someone murder someone for christs sake

If you would like to come into my office perhaps we can sort something out.

th-that can't be true!
i clean these rooms meticulously

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I want a Tequila for me and my frens

Right away! The salt is on the tables but here are the shots and lime.

>go to the basement of the hotel
>see Australians
>one tries to attack me
>notice his land tether is rusty
>Break it
>Laugh as he falls into the sun

what are you doing down here?
this area is off limits to guests. i'm going to have to ask you to leave, sir

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Sorry sir I'm going to have to ask you to pay for Australian customers room now. That's £45 pounds please

Oi man drink with me

smarter then u
Not all of them do, but cheaper packaging and the downsides to drinking milk out of a bag are vastly greater in the perception of those who haven't used them. Plus if you drink right out of the bag it's kinda like sucking on a tit which is a pretty chad way to get your calcium.
>German humour
I'll play it straight anyway - we don't

The breakfast, lunch and dinner options are all fishe.

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Wheres the sissy fuckboys at

I guess I can still work after one drink. More tequila?

we are not that type of hotel
the Jow Forums hotel is a respectable establishment

*throws all the pool towels in the water so no one can dry off*

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Sorry could you go and fish the towels out the pool before your break please
Please do not damage Hotel property thanks
A different hotel

I thought that animals weren't allowed at this hotel.

right away.
i'll bring up some dry towels as soon as possible

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Where the gym?

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Something seems wrong with this hotel. All the staff seem to be british, but none of them are nekos

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Through the door at the end of the lobby and turn left, we have a fully equipped pool and lobby for all paying guests
But I am though...

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WOW ur a female Neko?
please could you provide me some mating services

Thanks

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It's alright, i just want to give you the love and affection that you need and deserve.

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