Agile

>zero IT experience
>somehow get hired as "scrum master"
>no idea what this position is
>go around once a day asking everyone in the IT department if they have everything they need
>spend rest of day browsing Jow Forums
>people say I'm much better than the last guy

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Hope you're enjoying your first week. Just wait until nobody gets shit done anymore due to lack of organization while sales guys keep shoveling out product to incompetent customers which leads to an even larger backlog.

it's where you basically put purchase orders for the team, keep head dev, head qa and pm talking to each other, ask team members erryday what they've done and assign tasks twice a month.

How did you get the job? I'm tired of programming, burnt out, but I never made it to real manager.

>spike

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i have good social skills and networking skills

Fair enough. I'm not too bad at that myself, I'll just go to more startup meetups or some shit.

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No they arent

guack :DDD

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Fuck ducks. We have Muscovy ducks in our backyard in ga and they're easily the most annoying animal I've ever had to deal with. They take shits the size of humans and they're constantly beating the shit out of each other with their wings. They're too fat to fly properly so they glide until they crash into a bush or crash land like flight 1549 into the Hudson

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I wholeheartedly agree.

This, caught some duck-fuckin' on my way to work.
They stared at me and then resumed.