Internet of things

Your body will appreciate it and it will make you feel better and less depressed

If it's close enough proximity that a buzzer could wake the entire house, nobody is fucking asleep anyway from the machine running.

You shouldn't be doing household chores during the night.

I go to the gym, does a lot more than a simple run to the washer will.

Maybe if you have a shitty washer, mine is quiet other than the buzzer.

Why not though?

>zoomers lel
back in my day appliances lasted long enough that you developed a mind-machine meld with them

>tfw
youtube.com/watch?v=qjwT7lIrcnU

You should be sleeping at night.

Internet? No.
Intranet? Hell yes.

I want my Star Trek terminals all over the house please, thank you.

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how about literally walk over and look at it
or, you know, remember what you last did with it.

>ever needing to know the status of white goods when you're not in the same local as them
Yes you are faggot

>needing oil to cripple parts
>not just coding the software to fault after X years
Clearly you haven't taken the
>planned-obsolescense-pill
yet

>not being able to sleep through a nuclear apocalypse
you really are a soiboybetacuck

>I go to the gym
there are not enough hours in your lifetime to train that faggotness out, give up.

i like to run a refresh cycle on dried things that have been left in the cold dryer for more than a couple hours
a little burst of moisture and warmth makes folding easier

i guess if it wasn't for other internet of shit concerns, being able to do that remotely on the way home would be a tiny bit useful

You will also need electronic locks connected to the internet so that the government can collect their bux if you forget about it.

>non free washing machine

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>wasting energy because you're too much of a softcock to put on room temperature clothes

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gayest post on Jow Forums ever. congrats!

folding, for towels

thanks, and i didn't even talk about konmari yet

Nigger how the fuck can you struggle folding a towel

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can't you just check it an hour or two later
what kind of stupid ass are you that you don't know how long it usually takes?

towels wrinkle easily if left alone in a pile for hours
when you're going to stack 30 clean towels, it's ideal for them to be straightened and uniform

I had "internet of things" before I had proper internet.
like, sending an sms to turn on the washing machine or oven.
or sending an sms to get the roomtemp/moisture or later even mms picture of my driveway (so I knew if I had to shovel snow).

back then I had to use expensive programmable logic controllers (lucky I got some from work)
nowadays you can just use some cheapo arduino with sensors and some relays

>buy washing machine
>doesn't work without internet
>only one washing cycle all others need to be unlocked with payments
>after a few years the machine is bricked on purpose because it is "too old you need to upgrade"
>notorious Russian hackers flood your neighbours and shrink your undies

The Botnet demands it

This actually would be far more wiser.
Though how would you update your systems or get recall alerts with out it connected to the internet.

hope he's doing alright

>that breakdown when his missus left him and he's drunk in every video
Grade A kino

I don't know about your washing machine needing the internet, but a washing machine that's in a common area for an apartment or other multi-unit living space would benefit from it. People hate sitting in those laundry rooms and could really use a notification a couple minutes before their laundry finishes so they can take their shit out right after it does.

That's in third world America. In normal parts of the world we have our own washing machines.

>Why on Earth would my washing machine need the internet?
Porn.

>his house is so small that he doesn’t have to walk down two flights of stairs to get to the washing machine

Your college/university dorm rooms had their own washing machines? That seems excessive.

Who in the fuck cares if a towel is wrinkled?

I guess my mother uses Jow Forums now.

>this faggot here

I used ur mother last night if u know what i mean

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No one lives in dorms except for people who can't afford renting apartmets. All of my friends rented apartments.

I doubt that but if you did I hope she enjoyed it.

She loved it, I showed her a wonderful evening and left with a kiss.
I shan't be calling her back though

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Send out a distress signal and go to red alert.

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Did you enjoy her huge saggy tits?

They were supple and ample for satisfying my fetishes. I fixed the poor network configuration before I left so the poor woman had proper Netflix you useless ungreatful little shit.

It doesn't. No one asked for it, just like nobody asked for cloud computing. It's another failed gimmick that won't succeed in the market.

Not everything that gets suggested is adopted into mainstream use and thank god for that. I don't want asshats with Google Glass walking around everywhere, nor do I want to have to use a smartphone to activate my juice maker.

Why don't you just embrace the botnet?

So it calls your phone telling you it is done,as well as psychology Pavlov dog training you l,and fucking your internal temporal spatial cognition.

I agree with you.

based and datapilled

You realize you can set a timer on your smartphone, right?

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>Am I the only one that likes to be able to check the status of things?
It's fun and innovative all the way back to the Trojan Room Coffee Cam days. But too much is being shared now, to people we don't know, for reasons that can be twisted beyond our original social contract.

Please don't give these Jews anymore ideas!!!

So we can track your behaviour and improve our product to make more money over the competition.

I mean uh..So you can uh, see when it's done on your phone.

this is the only correct answer. I just read an article somewhere about how smart tvs' new revenue stream is your data, not just you purchasing the fucking tv itself.

Let's just say you do need internet for toasters and stuff and maybe we'll have IPv6 world some day.