Tesla slowing dying

Why exactly does Jow Forums hate a real life billionaire, and worship a lying dotard who played one on TV?

This, but unironically. If it would cost $10 000 - maybe. Otherwise - no, fucking no. Scratch on new $40 000 thing is unacceptable.
Also Tesla is complete botnet, all electrical systems should be removed and replaced with third-party systems, maybe even proprietary, but without call-back feature

>Nobody is buying a car over the internet
>except for 80% of their existing customers

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You'd have to be a hardcore Musk fanboy retard to buy a car you can't even see in person. Tesla will never ever be able to compete with real car companies when they have retards like Musk in change, they actually know the industry which is why they've lasted a 100 years meanwhile Musk knows jack shit about the industry and how to get consumers to buy.

They sell directly to customers. Now they want to sell directly to customers without even having a physical store. Seems like the next step.

80% of nothing is nothing.

>You'd have to be a hardcore Musk fanboy retard to buy a car you can't even see in person
So 99.9% of his demographic.

people were able to take a look at the car in person prior to buying one online

>Tesla had stores
Got two news in one article!

This is Jow Forums you blind fish

>80% of less than 1% marketshare

I guess being #1 in customer satisfaction just proves all Tesla buyers are "Musk fanboy retards".

lmao.

im glas tesla is around, really up'd the car game.

with the new Model 3 pricing. That car is a fucking steal for all the tech you get with the car.

>car industry
the only thing they are good at is asking the government for bailouts

I guess you Musk hater retards will walk and fucking like it when public transit switches to Tesla buses.

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why are you assuming its Jow Forums teslas are objectively shit. You could get any old car from the 70s or even older and drive it across america only needing 10 minute breaks to refule, the Tesla takes like 7 hours to charge

The US big 3 all make the top 10 corporate welfare queens list, and Tesla paid a gov loan back 9 years early with interest.

>Nobody is buying a car over the internet when they can't even see it in person.
Wrong

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Would it be incredibly surprising behavior from an overwhelmingly hiveminded, le upvote mentality customer base? Especially one that just dropped 60 large on a poorly made Eclipse with a battery?

No, people who buy Teslas and other cars in that price range do exactly that.

sure kid

Eclipses are made by Mitsubushi and I'd be looking for $100 off if it didn't have a battery.
Tesla has a great rep for quality.

I bet the overlap between people who legitimately believe this and people who complain about student loan forgiveness is close to 100%.

That's true for clunkers and used cars not for something new and heald to a standard like teslas.

>What went wrong?
IoT bullshit made the cars really inconvenient to use.

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>High customer satisfaction rating for a brand that locked buyers out of battery capacity that physically existed in their car till they paid $10k extra for a "software upgrade"
Sounds like fanboyism to me.

Well excuse me for assuming anybody on Jow Forums who's enormously retarded came from Jow Forums.

Your thinking of the iPhone, we be talking cars.

Is that a real thing? I've only owned purely mechanical cars are people really letting windows 10 upgrade tier software control their car?

are you fucking shitting me? is that real?
>go for a roadtrip
>bumfuck-nowhere
>no interwebz
>fuck you, you ain't driving back; WALK, BITCH

Meanwhile Tesla only exists at all because of government tax breaks for electric car buyers.

how exactly would it know if there was an update without internet

Ol Muskie was reporting low sales numbers for Teslas to keep that customer rebate. After the gov found out, they forced him to take the same handouts that ford, gm, and chryler get.

You only had cars from the 70's?

I'm talking about cars, fag.

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You could literally fund Tesla 10 times over with all the handouts the automotive industry has gotten and that's just at the federal level
Do you even have any ideas how many state level land and tax breaks they got for opening new plants that closed in 8 years.

All teslas come equipped with carrier pigeons just in case that happens.

from when it last connected to check, just before going out of range

Yep, it is real.
This is why Tesla need VVVF GTO inverter (not IGBT rubbish).
youtube.com/watch?v=b4AMDiYV4PU

Oh, so they temporarily disabled battery overcharge protection because of emergency.
Why didn't you just say so?

>making up entirely fictional scenarios that never happened to support an argument

It exists because of investors. Extent of tax breaks can explain part of investing willingness, but not nearly everything can be said results from that. Otherwise Norway would be electric car manufacturing centre of the world.

take your medication

>Free supercharging
Did ford or gm hand out free gas?

>defending always-on DRM, IN A CAR

Did ford or gm lock 1/4 of your tank?

Look at you here, defending Tesla because you're a poorfag Musk fanboy but because you're poor you don't even know anything about the cars lol.
electrek.co/2016/06/09/tesla-60kwh-pricing-option-software-revolution-exclusive-details/
>You see, the 60kWh Tesla Model S you buy on Tesla’s website or from a retail location isn’t any different than a standard Model S 75kWh that you could buy yesterday – from a hardware perspective. Tesla simply will sell you the car at a $8500 discount and software lock on 20% of the battery power of the car. But! You can later unlock the car’s extra 20% of battery if you give Tesla that $8500 (plus $500 more as a sort of late/delivery fee).
Muskfags will defend this.

No car these days is purely mechanical. There are onboard computers even in 80s cars. The difference is that most onboard computers are offline. Not Tesla's though. They really want to shove the IoT crap up your ass because it's the hip new fad and much like with Nike's self-lacing shoes that got bricked because of bugs in a firmware update, it leads to nothing but problems.

People really need to stop shoving computers with internet connections where they don't belong.

I didn't had a Tesla, but I had some electric scooter.
Ninebot - fucking botnet, with shitty locked down battery, and dangerous """safety""" features.
Chink noname - bad assembly, but everything else is better.
I think Tesla is more like fucking Ninebot....

seeand at least try to absorb perspectives that confict with your preconcieved notions.

>DRM
>critical system software update that might keep your car from killing you requires that you install it before driving
>>meanwhile at FCA wheel falls of of your brand new Jeep
>>have to start federal investigation for them to fix it.

Yea they locked it behind a paywall that requires me to buy the fleet version of the vehicle to get the 30 gallon tank instead of the 20.

fucking brainlet

I'm a licensed mechanic.

>held to a standard like teslas.

LMAO

teslas are shit

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>People really need to stop shoving computers with internet connections where they don't belong.
Agreed, and also unnecessary fine electronics.

t. Tesla-fanboy whose Audi's electric locks freeze randomly at -20C levels

Audi and Porsche's electric cars are going to be better, so who cares?

And? You're ignorant of Tesla charging money to unlock existing battery capacity, doesn't matter what you are.

>78% of Model 3 orders were placed online, 82% without a test drive
>Model 3 sales driven entirely by fanboys who don't care and don't speak at all for the greater population after this initial hype weakens and competition ramps up

I won't get a VAG, unless it is SKODA, since only SKODA offers VAG without gimmicks.

Just like BWM's and Chevrolet's right ? and Toyota Honda and Nissan ??
With all their money and resources TESLA IS TOTALLY FINISHED

Toyota only needs to replace ICE with nothing and put couple batteries here and there.

Look. Here is the difference.
>physically less volume
>limited by software.

Why Tesla didn't put some sort of big red switch, that would allow to utilize 100% of charge, or even better: simple voltmeter with some markings?

Most of their stores were just showrooms, you would buy the cars online anyway. They also rely on lots of third party vendors for things like vehicle storage, delivery, etc. Most of the staff there were just trained chimpanzees who would let you open the Model X doors and go "ooh" and "aah" despite not having any more info on delivery and availability than you would looking at their Twitter

>brick and mortar is dying
no shit Sherlock

this it the real truth because archaic laws prevent them from selling their own cars in most states

>$500 "Delivery fee" for an OTA update because the $8500 for the update itself wasn't enough
Okay now this is epic.

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No, they allowed to increase chooch factor.

>Sour grapes, the thread
How embarrassing.

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if only the hundreds of engineers at tesla were as smart as you.

What's that? You don't want a car that doesn't let you start it unless you update the software when you're obviously late for work and don't have time for this bullshit? Well, you must hate it because you can't afford it!

Yeah. This is some Mactoddler levels of delusion right here. Kill yourself, preferably not with a direct gunshot to the head because scientists need to know how someone so stupid can even manage to breathe, let alone use a computer.

Tesla enginiggers are OK, maketing niggers are to blame.
If there were no Musk and shit, it would have
>cockpit like an airplane with dozens of gauges
>no protections besides overcharge and discharge
>no engine braking simulation
>no iPad, manual knobs

I'm pretty sure you're thinking of Microsoft windows.

Giant RC cars for adults. What went wrong?

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Probably the fact that anyone with garage can build a similar vehicle for about 1/4 the price.

wants a thousand gauges in a car that doesn't need them.
wew lad.

Nice, fuck Elon Musk.

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It doesn't matter what he does there will be demand for these cars for YEARS. Their main issue currently is production and distribution.

Hi Elon

>TESLA I NEED TO GET TO WORK TO MAKE MY CAR PAYMENTS
>I’m sorry Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that

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stores and dealers where a huge waste of money anyway. fucking boomers.

Yeah, sure, you can ride a car without any gauges, but it is inconvenient.
In electric car it is a good idea to have following instruments.
>Main battery voltage (replaces fuel gauge)
>Battery current (replaces instant consumption readout and somewhat replaces tachometer)
>Battery temperature (replaced engine temperature gauge)
>Speedometer
I don't know about you, but driving car on hills without temperature gauge is sketchy. I that a lot of modern cars don't have them, and have overheat light on dashboard, but it is not cool at all.

youtube.com/watch?v=H8ro6kpKlw0

youtube.com/watch?v=AgMTx_xFezM

>execs giving each other handjobs for startup revenue increases
Tell me something new

>What went wrong?
opening stores for no reason.

they also sell used, and have been caught on multiple occasions selling fucking shitty cars they claimed were restored

You'd have to be a hardcore Musk fanboy retard to buy a tesla at all, so I think he's gonna be fine.

this is like every spacex thread on /sci/

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There's so many fuckwits here lining up to suck the pedo's microcock that I'd think this was reddit

It was a cult build around Elon Musk.

I'm gonna back you up on this. The number of fanboys prepared to lay down cash, sight unseen, is, at some point -and we are prob near/past it already- going to be overtaken by the commercial realities of volume selling, in which there is fuck no way majority going to lay down $50k or w/e without laying hand or even eyeball upon the product. There is not enough True Believers in the Cult of Elon to sustain 'nope, you can't try it at a dealership, just fucking buy it already' as a growth model. I'm not even sure how their model works - no-one likes dealerships much, but, what happens when a Tesla needs serviced - or, does that never happen either?

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Tesla started out as online only.