Bidets are technology

Bidets are technology.

Why are you still walking around with a shit-crusted ass like a caveman?

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because I find the smell erotic
nigger

I'm not. I have a Brondell CL950

I clean my ass with a paper towel soaked in rubbing alcohol after ever shit.

>blasting water up your butt

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>not

Unironically posting my (attached) bidet.

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How can you trust that little hose thing to be clean? It's in the middle of everything. Surely it's full of pee. Do you like splashing other people's pee on your butthole?

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>he pees out of his ass

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It's literally retracted into the seat. What are you sperging about?

Can I install a bidet myself if I'm an idiot or do I have to hire someone?

Flat head screwdriver and a wrench is all I needed for mine (no heat)

You unscrew the two screws holding in your regular seat, swap on the bidet seat, screw it back on, unscrew the water intake hose, and screw in the bidet's T-valve between the hose and the wall.
It's not hard, it takes less than an hour, and there's a wealth of videos to walk you through it.

The only time you might have trouble is if you get one with a hot water intake (you can still have hot water on others, they just have a built-in heater; ones with hot water intake need a fair amount of plumbing work).

You know the water supply to your toilet's tank? The adapter basically makes that a "T" connection, diverting water to the bidet as needed. It's literally just turning off the water, draining the tank (flush), unscrew a hose, attach a new hose, attach the bidet, and turn the water back on.

Are you mentally retarded of just a fucking idiot?

Splashes, user. Wherever you pee, little droplets will bounce back everywhere and get on everything.

You're gross. You can ask anons to send you their piss bottles so you can bathe in it you unclean psycho.

Thanks, seems simple enough. Guess I'll buy a bidet to keep my bunghole clean.

I made you a diagram showing how simple the setup is.

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I just take a shower after I shit.

Its great

isnt the opening of the bidet full of fecal matter

No, most are self cleaning and many either retract or have a cover when not spraying

I used to say this but bidet is great when when having diarrhea

I'm getting my bathroom done in a few days and I've been looking at bidets. I think I'm going with the Bio Bidet Ultimate BB-600 unless there are any better ones in that price range.

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I just use a wirebrush and Dettol

what a bunch of stupid bullshit lel

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Imagine having RGB in your toilet

I just use one of those wet wipes with aloe vera and/or witch hazel shit for the last wipe.

Works well for me.

Imagine having a big huge warning sign on your toilet.

those are legit bad for all waste plumbing scenarios

I'll bet wiping your ass after a bidet gets you more crusty shit than wiping which removes every goddamn bit of it.

Enjoy your wet, shit-encrusted butt, bidetmorons.

You bet wrong, retard

>attached bidets

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Name of the bidet? How much does it cost? I really like it.

That's where my anal fissue comes into play

I use the hard-spray setting in the shower to clean my butt

Use of bidets should be mandated/heavily encouraged desu. The lower use of toilet paper due to them leads to fewer turdbergs within sewer systems. The use of bidets is able to significantly reduce sewerage overhead due to either current pipe standards requiring declogging far less offten or to have far smaller pipes being clogged at the same rate

You can get ones which UV sterilise themselves

It retracts into the seat so you literally cannot pee onto the nozzle. Or do you also worry about pee making its way up into the tank and then into the water that comes out of your sink?

>His sink isn't a faucet which feeds his toilet tank

But it's connected to the same water line that feeds his toilet.

>gaming toilet

I just use aloe vera baby wipes

You don't toss them. You have like a micro trash can or one that twists/seals the bag after each opening.

thats disgusting

what the fuck

I don't want guests to think I have some weird medical problem that requires a special toilet.

>Using botnet bidet, when GNU/asian shitter exists.

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based

Why are Americans so afraid of new toilet tech?

But what about compressor toilets?

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When I went to Japan there was a toilet that opened up when you went into the bathroom.

They became associated with prostitutes in the Anglosphere way back when and the association of them being unclean from that hasn't gone away since, even if the reason for the thought has gone.

looks like a vc tunnel with air conditioning desu

>Please don't pay to use a pay toilet.
>2016-12-16
>
>Pay toilets are nasty, and ought to be illegal. Those of us who are not poor can afford the price, if we accept the practice; poor people can't. To deny people access to a toilet when they need one is nasty and degrading.
>
>I have concluded that the least we can do, to eliminate pay toilets, is to avoid giving them money. Instead of paying them, I go to great lengths to find some other toilet.
>
>Please join me in rejecting pay toilets firmly.
>
>Copyright (c) 2016 Richard Stallman Verbatim copying and redistribution of this entire page are permitted provided this notice is preserved.

>pay toilet
w-what?

Lol.

Im from america. What the fuck is a bidet - is that one of those big french breads?

LOll

fuck off

lol

>having guests
yikes

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>stool stool
Based and squat pilled

Not that user but that's how you should be doing it, because eventually you will have to call a plumber otherwise.

$30 on Amazon BUY ONE NOW.

>squirting water at your filthy asshole
>water and shit splashing everywhere on your ass and under the toilet seat
Moist toilet paper is cleaner since the shit is contained to only around the asshole itself. Just fold, dampen and wipe. Hell, you don't even need a fucking bidet. Just use the regular water faucet.

The fuck? Just throw the wipes in the fucking wastebin in the bathroom like the rest of the tp.

Use baby wipes. This will change your life forever. Trust me

As a pajeet, this image offends me.

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