Sir, we need to check your personal computer. You have to tell us the password, too. Do not resist

>Sir, we need to check your personal computer. You have to tell us the password, too. Do not resist.

Now what?

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sorry i forgot my password

>ahaha sorry sir this is my friend's computer, i don't know the password

Sorry sir I lost it in a boating accident :^)

>implying I didn't come with purged disks and a freshly installed windows that has nothing on it.

just as the founding fathers envisioned

>sorry i forgot my password

No problem, sir, we have an ethical hacker in the next room, he will deal with this problem.

Give them the password to the crappy drive selected as boot #1 in bios, show them bone stock windows
Keep the main disk taped inside the laptop but disconnected and reattach it after passing through security

I don't leave my house.

Never mind, sir. We still have to check it.

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>have sex

>before flight set boot device as secondary msata ssd
>disable primary nvme
>msata ssd has standard normie programs, stock windows with scantly clad women as backrground
>facebook, netflix and discord autostart
>email auto starts, fake email for spam bullshit

>having a laptop
I'm not gay.

why would I ever have a labtop?

>This is my friend's computer
You stole it, Tyrone.

I forgot my password, but you fags have a bitlocker backdoor anyway

I hope he brought a supercomputer and a few years of time.

this is what it's like to be employed as a burger flipper. When you grow up and travel a lot, you'll understand.

How is that even remotely legal in any first world country? I mean they're not even the police or any other government officials with the warrant. They're just a bunch of glorified security workers earning less than minimum wage.

>be white
>implying this would ever happen

thanks for the laugh, OP

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this.
having a "rig" is for childish fucks who are mentally glued all day to this media consumption sloth & gluttony throne in their bedroom. probably spam make 'subtle' "women are all whores because they look at me weird" threads on Jow Forums all day too.

then why the fuck did you ask me for my password in the first place

>Partition 1 is a decoy Windows 10 set to boot before traveling
>Partition 2 is the hacker Russian spy Linux system that won't appear in W10 because it can't understand that file system

Of course officer, it's gaskikes1488fuckniggers

You actually have to type "startx" after typing the login/password because I never installed a login manager. I'll just say my computer is broken

Invoke a Constitution article that alows me to refuse to testify against myself.
You know I don't live in a totalitarian shithole.

It isn't. You don't have to give up your password or unlock your device. This is fantasy

No problem sir, i'm an ethical hacker

Imblying TSA has time for this shit on anything but the smallest airport.

Give it back, Jamal.

What do they even search for in these totalitarian illegal searches?
Just a folder on your desktop called CHILD_PORNOGRAPHY or TERRORIST_PLAN_DONT_OPEN?

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Wasn't a kid fined a shitload of money because TSA asked him to verify he owned every single song on his iPod?

>with scantly clad women as background
"I'm sorry, sir. These images you have here are sexist and we have to remove them. Your computer will be sent back to you after they are removed and you have paid the fine."

It's for your safety :^)

Based, who needs a login manager.

>open my laptop and log in without hesitation
>hand over laptop so they can search it
>they browse over my very specific porn folder labeled "mature steam locomotives without any clothes on"
>after searching the officers give me back my laptop and thank me for cooperation
>one of the officers slip me his card with a wink
>there is a steam locomotive in the corner
And that is the story how you were born, Tommy

Fuck how did you know what I name my plan folder!?

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>TSA found the terrorist folder
It's over guys.

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Australia & New Zealand both have laws allowing full searching of devices and being forced to provide passwords.

I fucked up my os installation and now you need press f12 to bring up bios and select the correct drive to boot from, otherwise it just goes into repair mode.
They tried once, got the blue repair mode screen, stared at it for a full minute, turned off and in again, stared at the blue sceeen again, closed the laptop and I was done.

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Not without a warrant.

I wish I could get a job checking people's laptops at checkpoints like this. I'd install keyloggers and malware on every pc I get my hands on.

Good luck, I express mailed the RAM to my destination.

i fucking hate when that happens
would setting the boot order differently fix it
also send more grills

>We can see a second SSD on the X-ray scan. Can you please explain why it's not visible in Disk Management?

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I don't know, I never bothered to try and on reflex press f12 now. Seems to work as a good computer illiterate block, they legit sometimes think they broke it by pressing something.

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You can technically say no, but if you do they usually take all of your shit and put you in a locked room for a few days.

>TSA found the terrorist folder

One of them whispers into your ear: "Hail Hydra!"

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>Things that have literally never been said

>physically bringing any personal data over the boarder instead of encrypting and uploading it beforehand
You deserve this

I have public key encryption.

futureboy.us/pgp.html#Cool
>You can also encrypt a message that you can not decrypt! This may sound silly, but you may want to write something to someone that you cannot ever possibly be compelled to decrypt! It will be impossible for you to decrypt, even though you wrote it and encrypted it and even if you have the file in your possession and even if you have all your secret keys and you know all of your own passwords and have them written down! That is cool. (You can smile serenely while they're beating you with a rubber hose, knowing that you can't endanger the lives of your sources, nor give up your rights, even if you felt like that might be entertaining for a change.)

Fuck the left one. Kill the right one.

resistance is my second name bitches cmon you want to fuck with me I will fuck you

You're right, they're whispered in your ear while your bent over the table with Pedro's gloved hand up your rectum.

I'd wonder how the fuck my living room turned into a boomer convention check-in line.

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sure thing bro! just remember to browse through all 50 gb of unsegregated porn, memes and webms

Why the hell do I have to tell them the password? Just unlock the device for them.

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Just use your phone, gramps.

country of the free

>he doesn't use truecrypt hidden OS full disk encryption

>windows

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I travel in and out of the US often, and I barely even have to interact with a person at customs.
I'm assuming they x-ray your checked bags to make sure you're not smuggling in kilos of cocaine, pest ridden crops, or illegal aliens.
I must not look suspect - white guy born in the US, served in the military, etc.

TSA harasses you getting on the plane, but they only care to xray your stuff to make sure you're not hiding a bomb or weapon.
They'll never ask you for the contents of your phone/computer.

>pulls hard drive out of your machine
>plugs it into a read only bridge to his Kali install
>copies all your files because you actually use unencrypted windows and only post linux VM screenshots to flex on Jow Forums

Warrant or fuck off.

I don't use password, I use keys. The key is on usb stick at my mom's place.

Does this actually happen? I fly internationally twice a year from LAX and have never had this happen to me

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I would pay to see their reaction

Give them my password. I don't legally have to, but they don't have to let me into the country

"It's okay, sir. We have replacement RAM on site."

>he doesnt have a custom bios and modified ram with a battery to check a key in order to boot
dude cringe

>posted from his apple laptop

Sure the password is deathtoamericaXD

Has this ever happened?

I wager they only snipe people's laptops if you fit the bill of a pedophile or a drug smuggler.

>nothing but a fresh copy of windows on the internal storage
>normal contents backed up and placed on dvd-r's in a dvd-r case with no labels/writing on them

>tfw RAM battery died
>now have to reinstall

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I'd rather not...

>1 partiton for linux

>Sir, please, bend over and pull down your pants. We need to search your body cavity.

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>tfw 650gb Jow Forums folder is saved on the cloud
>tfw 6tb of weebshit saved on the cloud
The only thing they will find is my paint doodles.

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What sad piece of worthless virgin shit saves thumbnails?

do they really think you can't upload CP to a private cloud server and download it back when you crossed the border?

You can if you have a really good download/upload speed
Otherwise heh

>we'll have to interview you for 12 hours

Turn 360 degrees and go back to a free country.

unironically the first time this phrase made me laugh.

swapfiles exist faggot.

that's probably why you'll never get one, fucking neet.

>RAM battery
eh?

More than one news agency has successfully sneaked guns through TSA as a test.

Read the posts.
>modified ram with a battery

Based

>*cloud goes down*
Nothin personnel

you wouldn't want to bring your linux machine to states. they would consider that suspicious. just get a burner laptop and install ltsc on it if you really need to access computer during your stay.

>keeping your "not wrongthink" data on a memory card currently housed in a satnav in your hold luggage

freedom aint free

That's irrelevant, all the partitions Linus will create won't be readable or seeable by W10

cool it with the antisemitism now, will you?

1. you can use ntfs/fat on linux
2. using just 1 partition is bad because if you want to reinstall you need to nuke ~
just dont use MBR like a normal person.

>bootloader on USB drive
>drive encrypted, LUKS header also on USB drive
>take laptop
>"its broken"
>try to switch on
>no os
>inspect computer
>just random data on drive
Good luck, TSA

>so why did you tell the check-in counter that you were not carrying any items that belong to someone else? Please come this way.