Taking a shit

>taking a shit
>feels like its gonna be a good one but then something happens like someone knocks on the door and you end up pinching it early on reflex
>good shit ruined
>now you have to spend a full 5 minutes just wiping your ass
is this the worst thing ever or what bros

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we all dream of the one wipe shit

I've had the one wipe shit before. It's fucking magical.
OP is right tho this is literally the worst thing in the world

I spread my cheeks before I shit so less wiping even though I have hemmeroids

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Tell me who you are quoting.

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when you take a shit and go to wipe and its already clean

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>being such a beta someone else can ruin your shit

i have the a one wipe shit half the time i shit
get on my level

You have the one wipe shit because you're so stained with past sharts you can't tell the difference anymore burger

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well if you have to like cough or sneeze or something then man you know what im trying to say

>wipe once
>all comes off
>wipe a second time
>nothing on the toilet paper
if only you could know this feel, southern netherlands

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because you're lazy and have skiddies in your under dacks

What you eat?

i dont and i am thorough every time i wipe
it seems non-americans get extremely angry whenever an american is superior in any way
i dont eat often but i usually have oatmeal or burgers or fruit

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Did any of you guys ever have the shitwipe nightmare? Where you wipe so many times you get sick of it and just put your pants back on even though your ass is still giving off shit?

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how do you get 'extreme anger' from ordinary posts?
are you that thin skinned?

i think it would be easy to have read your post venomously, just as with your current post
are you angry?

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no are you?
when reading the sense of mood comes from the reader

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yeah man thats the worst

it seems weve both mistunderstood each other then

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Take psyllium husk daily, drink plenty of water, and you'll have no-wipers regularly - not even a slight smudge of australian on the toilet paper

thanks for the advice user
i already drink a shit load of water (about 3L per day) but my diet is pretty bad. guess im not getting enough fiber, didnt really think about it too much

always use leafs
they soak up the shit better