I've had gender dysphoria for about 2 years now and closeted about it as my dad is transphobic(My mom died of a drug overdose when I was 3) and yells at me consistently and on rare occasion will hit me. Every time he does it I blame myself but quickly get hope.
For about a year now I would describe myself as passively suicidal, I wanted to die but didn't want to pull the trigger. But for about a month now it ramped from me just being 'passively suicidal' to me seeming genuinely suicidal, When I'm in bed I'll "fantasize" about dying before going to bed and I've just wanted to end it. And I probably would have if I had a way too.
I've always used different platforms on the internet to express myself and talk, But that doesn't seem like enough anymore. About 5 months ago I used cannabis and an occaisonal shot of alcohol to cope and still do that. It really does calm me down but at my age it really isn't a healthy habit.
No matter how hard I try I can't get my head out of suicide thoughts. I've got what most people would describe as a good life, Middle class, above average grades, Lots of friend and I always listen to happy upbeat music which does temporarily give me joy. But gender dysphpria and not being able to express myself tears me apart to no end.
It's a horrible state to be in. In 2017 I was living my high life and now I'm at a low point. Please help me out.
>A fucking leaf >depressed suicidal tranny like pottery
Logan Mitchell
>tranny is suicidal oh no how did this happen
Andrew Rivera
wtf I love Jews now?
Sebastian Harris
I've been through some tough times before so I know how it feels like to want to end it all, I'd love to help you out, every tried talking to a therapist?
Brandon Nelson
Thanks Jow Forums, Just what I needed was edgy teens who breeze through anything as a joke.
Brandon Johnson
hahahhahahahahha the fucking tranny wants to end it, and to top it all off its a fucking leaf! If youre going to do it then do it, stop posting about it on Jow Forums and certainly don’t stream it you absolutely mentally ill retard.
Lincoln Rodriguez
I dont think I could, I live in such a tight community that the news would make it back to my dad+My dad monitors usage of my debit card
Thomas Gutierrez
This was exactly the response I was expecting. Personally find amusement and gets help at the Same time
Charles Miller
If i could live in the us I would
Nolan Mitchell
I'm sorry to hear that. I can't do much but I want to let you know that even though we're strangers, I care about you and your happiness
i was about to feel you bro but then >Lots of friend lololol fuck off just talk with them instead of internet strangers dickhead
Jordan Hall
But I cant, Theyre the kind of friends that would spread rumors person to person until eventually my dad gets the word
Jayden Clark
Just be yourself (male).
Jonathan Garcia
Oh my god, shut the fuck up retard. You're looking for a stable sense of self, but you're doing the very thing that keeps you from gaining any meaningful self-identity in the first place via confiding your identity in how others perceive it via the internet. Holy shit, and you come all the way here, to the anonymous masses, and scrape up what little sense of social validation that may come your way from a vent thread and then you have the gall to COMPLAIN about "edgy teens" on the website you know is entirely inhabited by them.
Lemme tell you right now, there's no single resolve to your problem, your crisis of identity, your current living situation. Your "gender dysphoria" bullshit ain't a hint either,--more likely is subconscious effort to dissociate and "escape" than anything. Don't fall for the tranny-cult love-bombing either, they're just as unresolved as you and whoops looks like you also fell back into the trap of letting others define you. There is no magic guide to escape, there is no grand destruction of the psycho-social structures that hold you back, no single dragon to slay, nothing. No. You've got to whittle your way out. How? Just do it. Small bite-sized pieces at a time. Set good precedents, not bad ones like dumb rotten attempts at sedating yourself from reality ala substance. If somebody in your life is more hassle than is needed, then take a break from them, who the hell needs em?-- Whatever it takes and whatever that means to you.
I cannot tell you much more because there isn't anything else that can be meaningfully translated across dead words on a computer screen. You have to do it, whatever it is, however small it is. Set A Precedent. Stop letting others define you. That's all.
And for christssake stop with the self-deprecation, it's fucking irritating and embarrassing ya dumb fagola.
Wyatt Jenkins
>abused >drug addicted >suicidal >tranny >wants society to bend to HIS cultural notion of muh gender Like clockwork Cutting off your donger wont make you any less sucidial then you are now
Jayden Brown
I don't know who you are but this post was incredibly based
Wyatt Sanders
Suicide is a tried, and tested formula for release.
I am NOT drug addicted. I may do drugs but I do it maybe 1 or 2 times a month,
Matthew Brown
drop me an email or something and i'll talk with you for serious user i know this thread seems kinda bad but i like to listen so if you want some good help you've got me
David Parker
youtube.com/watch?v=6ffv-6M-XdQ Stop watching porn and stop jacking off. At least for 90 days so your brain can reset to its natural state. That gender dysphoria shit will vanish.
William Harris
been almost a year on nofap
Dominic Clark
god willed it that all deviants were to be slain for glory and honor when he still was ours
Blake Rogers
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
And if not, move the fuck out, escape to a safe place, and maybe you'll see that you don't have to become a woman to live free of all that. And maybe your dad wants a woman in his life but that ain't you and if you think that's you you know what fuck it put on some clothes your mom once wore and get a wig that looks like her hair and pretend to be her because you obviously want to bang your dad out of Stockholm syndrome.
Kayden Ward
my honor has been stained by god, he will pay for this
Anthony Sullivan
just start chugging full fat cream until you wanna puke. that cured my depression.
Jackson Cook
>transphobic He's not afraid of trannies. Stop using that meme word.
Elijah Long
try to move out, if you're close enough with some of your friends, try explaining that you're in an unstable situation and really need to get out. and if you have any income or enough money, you should try to begin a transition; if you have gender dysphoria bad enough that you want to kill yourself, you won't get over it, it's not something you can "learn to live with" as I've had others say to me. just be sure you really do have gender dysphoria if you go trans.
either try get some prescribed or try self med if it doesn't work. if youre really dysphoric, it'll help you even in the beginning months way before you begin to pass, the changes to your body can improve your self image and general mood somewhat.
but it's a really difficult situation to be in, & your dad might kick you out if he found out you were taking pills. that's why you should try somehow to find another place to live. stealth-med is really difficult if your parents don't respect your privacy.
good luck user. please stay strong. ik people on this thread are just gonna spam me and you to kys so if you wanna talk more I'll add you on discord. i used to be in a situation similar to yours.
You don't want to be a woman. You want to be a cute anime girl, the object of your own sexual desire. Which is of course impossible in the long run, because even biological women age and get ugly. Do you want to disappoint your family and become a laughing stock only to kill yourself in the end anyway?
