I literally feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest and that I'm being choked constantly the majority of the time most days, and it's all in my mind. I am suffering from the most extreme anxiety I've ever felt but I am a past addict and am afraid to talk to a doctor because all they'll do is throw benzos at me. (I was addicted to uppers and alcohol though but know I'd wind up abusing benzos if prescribed)
I can't focus on anything. Work, relationships, etc because I had a life-changing amount of crypto in December and now it's only worth $50k. I don't need a new car. I wanted to be free, and I believed it was going to happen. I told my family I was going to be a millionaire this year and now they're laughing at me.
I checked myself into the hospital last night. told the doc I was an an addicy so all they did is give me some tordol and some ibuprofen and recommend me get back into counseling.
I drank 2 beers after I was released from the hospital. I know I shouldn't but I was ready to die and so desperate to make the anxiety go away.
It did, temporarily, but as soon as I wake up and check the markets it's back. I don't know how much longer I can suffer like this.