/brit/

Siiiiiiick tats

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faces of meth.com

I have been eating three cloves of garlic raw every night before bed

wouldn't that repeat on you horribly?

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imagine spending your free time here. imagine unironically favouring this
(you're alright, doug)
over friends/going out/shagging/anything else

too fucking french

so clearly dye lol

Super Mario Odyssey was excellent. Sequel when?

got turned down for a job lads
at least i still have the gf

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I want my, I want my, I want my MTV

going out? on this day of the week? in this part of the country?
toilberg would like a word

I have a feral cat and it is a proper prick

you just said like yesterday that she has a bf

>It does not play the game.
>It IS the game.

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Not a trace of it on my breath, sometimes I fart and it smells like garlic but that’s largely inconsequential. It does wonders for your natural testosterone by eliminating estrogen and cortisol. Also very good for general health and the immune system.

another banger

youtube.com/watch?v=FC3y9llDXuM

oh shit I just remembered schizo. I haven't been posting regularly for the last few months. what happened to him?

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>going out on Monday night
sorry senpai but we have a team meeting every Tuesday morning at work and I will not look a fool

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he's still here. we bullied him enough that he doesn't namefag anymore, he just posts on a swiss or norwegian proxy

l am a Pozz-Cuckold. You want to know what that is? Well, let me explain.

The normal cuckold wants just one gift from his black bull: A black child. But the Pozz-cuckold wants more. He wants three gifts. We are greedy little bitches. But first, here's how it goes.

Normally I drive in my Mercedes to a street gym where ripped blacks train their muscles, there skin shining with sweat and the air filled with their scent. I am already a bit hard just from thinking about it. Sometimes I cum a bit in my pants. I get out of the car and ask who of them has AIDS. Then they know what happens.

The black man with AIDS gets into my car and we drive to somewhere isolated. Then I take a small knife and stick it inside the hole of my penis and twist it a litte. In the cuckold community we call this the AIDS twister. Sure it hurts and causes me to bleed. But it is worth it.

Then the black man docks me until we both cum and I contract his AIDS. I already have 4 types of AIDS from this. That is the first gift. Then we drive on to my house and he fucks my wife, who has also contracted many types of AIDS. That is the second gift. And then 9 months later the third and best gift arrives: a black child who also has AIDS.

> Today is my 11th wedding Anniversary with my wife I met in high school. I send her this song every year on this date. We both thought the other person was out of our league for years, never thinking we had a chance with eachother. All till one party my Senior year (her Junior) when we were awkwardly left alone together as my friend was dating hers. We got to talking and couldn't believe how much we had in common, including our views of ourselves as essentially being "dirtbags". Ever since that night 15 years ago, we have been inseparable, never even broke up once. I'm 33 now and we have a great life with our two beloved little kids. I'm the butt of many jokes, as I haven't been with another woman in so long. But that desire has never mattered to me. She stole my heart that night, and has had it since, and I wouldn't change it for the world.

only le 00s kids will remember this

don't you be lying to me now Patrick! I'm willing to try this for myself but if i'm fighting back garlic burbs all night my reeeeee shall be heard in fucking Tamsania

just set up a date with a cute boy

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NORF

I stroked her hair and she smiled and everyone was like "awwww". I asked her out for dinner and she said yes, it's a nice little seafood restaurant on the riverside. Is that a good idea?

Oh and her mum is in her 40s but looks like she's in her 20s. If that's not good DNA, I don't know what is

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think I might be a murderer my dudes

Just get three cloves and chop them up into swallowable pieces and down them individually without chewing, goes down easy. Give it a go. I had a bad cold and started taking garlic cloves again and it cleared my sinuses and unfucked me overnight.

imagining a chink like you saying this and chuckling

my birthdays tomorrow and the future gf's birthday is in a little under a week.

if we were dating it'd be cute this time a year.

maybe next year haha.

grim

i dislike this smug aura

the fucking sticky hooks took the paint off the wall. some cheap as shit 1/2 layer job of ceiling paint on the wall and now I bet my landlord is going to fucking fleece me for it. $1000 down the drain for trying to make my "home" more than 4 white walls

Are other kot-like creatures welcome?

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lmaooo broooo thats fuckin sick

Dude... do you keep like... bodies... in your fridge? DUUUUUUUDE THATS SIIIIIICK

I wanna be
the very best
like no one ever was

had a dream where i was in a car full of girls

Sniffing my armpits

>Federal authorities on Monday announced the arrest of a U.S. Army veteran for an alleged terror plot in which authorities said he sought to “commit mass murder” by planting a bomb at a planned weekend white-supremacist rally in Long Beach.

>Mark Steven Domingo, 26, of Reseda, a former infantryman who served in Afghanistan, was arrested Friday after receiving what he thought was a bomb but was actually an inert device supplied to him by an undercover law enforcement officer, federal officials said.

imagine telling some FBI guy you want to make a bomb lmao what a retard

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no

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youtu.be/fJxRCV5uqwc

watched the trailer for "us" and now im spooked at the idea that theres twice as many black people as I thought

yes

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noticed that when I scratch my bumhole and smell it shortly after eating something very garlicky, the smell has definitely been absobed

Still think about Avicii from time to time

riveting stuff

poof

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rorke hasnt reared his ugly pale pimply head since getting BTFO earlier lol

i like the smell of my gooch sweat

i am rorke

NO! I am Rorke!

Take a look at my Tumblr for more kot pictures
catvshuman.tumblr.com/archive

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Ale, doritos, and pickles at 1am. Who wouldn't want to be NEET says I!

we are both rorke

Watching the ‘ime

>white autist
stays inside, plays video games all day, gets fat and cant get laid

>black autist
becomes a millionaire turbo nigger who is a high level basketball player

I was going for the ending of Spartacus where all the slaves tand up and claim to be spartacus to bamboozle the romans

gayest shit i've read all day

I am Sharticus

if you think about it though we are all rorke

fucking reek of Carling

A junkie came up to me today and asked me if I knew how to fix her phone because she spilled a can of coke on it

just had a wank, unsatisfactory and dull as usual. might get a gf to do the wanktoil for me

i wish i could hang out with alex jones on a regular basis

How did you answer?

I said no but the shop next door might, she went inside and came back out while I was still smoking my cigarette and told me it wasn’t broken

She had no teeth but was quite young

i am INSANE

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gf is fucking pissed at me and I think it might be the end but I sent her a really long soppy message which she read but didn’t reply to before she went to sleep
Is that a good thing

If you have to ask...

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leftypol getting his bollocks smashed

this is champions league kino

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>gf is fucking pissed at me and I think it might be the end but I sent her a really long soppy message which she read but didn’t reply to before she went to sleep Is that a good thing

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god I love wanking

idk i feel its never a good idea to send long messages to anyone let alone a gf

she probably opened it, grimaced, and said "blog on." and closed it

hah hah

Doubt she said that mate doubt it I really doubt it you’re making me doubt you and your incredulous assertions I really doubt it you scandalous whelp

whats rorke doing hiding in the closet? come out of there sweetie! theres a real world out here!

had this dream last night where a girl saw me crying

so fucking depressed because i'm retarded, and my gf told me to never talk to her again after i told her to shut up

umm..ya..made a so called "post" lads