Wage slave stories

Well me too

Accounting is a fucking awful profession full of women and kikes. I’d rather be dead desu. But I can’t give up $80k to browse reddit...I have a wife.

When I was a teenager, I was an absolute wagecuck. One of the finest, here's a good tale.
>be me, employed in retail as a lead
>nearby company warehouse starts having productivity issues, needed extra hands for basic tasks
>was asked to go over at 5am and help instead of working a shift
>worked 8 hours
>get a call from asst manager, store manager can't go in to close because of vagina cramps (not joking)
>friend who is also a store lead is busy smoking weed or something, doesn't answer calls from work as usual
>only one other asst manager, lives 40 minutes away and works 6 days/week
>go to store, asst manager says bye and leaves
>work like 4 more hours watching the store, making sure everything is done and clean before closing up as usual
>all that for $0.50 above minimum wage

>Get a job out of college
>Absolutely shit tier
>Cozy up and make friends with a manager from another department
>Fuck her and her husband and become incredibly close
>Tell her she is undervalued
>She gets a job paying her 40% more than she made
>Hires me as her right hand making what she used to make (~70k)

Everything worked out fine, because I accepted that nepotism and networking is all that really matters.

Work in an open plan office. I do absolute minimum, there really is no benefit to trying hard.

I usually complete work quickly /find some sneaky shortcut, then ratio out the completed parts.

Works every time

I literally bought me a gaming pc to cheer myself up. 1500 Euros. I was on the verge (or still am desu) of a downward depression spiral..

I'm so tired of wage cuckery but there is no other way of making money or getting rich. neetbux is not enough and only makes me more depressed. did that for 2 years.

You fucked her husband... Wtf gay

Attached: FrvrTU9.jpg (567x599, 141K)

>...I have a wife.
1:05
youtube.com/watch?v=GvyakoiU0zA

It's 2018 grandpa, I'll fuck anything with a pulse if it suits me.

Remember user...happiness is a habit of thought...and so is depression.

Focus your attention to your intention to be happy, every fucking day.

You’re alive...for now. Enjoy it you miserable cunt.

Degenerate
See you in hell

Teenaged children have historically always been the most loyal people and the ones that want to prove themselves. It's teens that worked as apprentices, that volunteer for war, that defend their homies when in need. Working above and beyond didn't always mean being a cuck, when there were still clear avenues to rewards. Our system right now takes this biologically-ingrained gift and shuffles them into the worst work with the least skill required and with the most petty and worthless low-level managers. And now boomers have the gall to shit on teens for telling them to fuck off and making MMO bux instead.

Get your EWP, W@H, confined space, explosives clearance and hr licence then apply to every mine through their website for operator roles. Start on 110k a year as trainee then go into bogger or jukbo operator. Jukbo makes 180k a year on average. Dont drink and smoke and study associate mining engineering. Specialise in geo as an elective. Then do safety certs and do your offshore tickets. Get on an oil rig or go into gas pipeline. Enjoy 400k a year working a month on month off roster.
In total will take you 10 years to get where im at. Glhf

Attached: images.jpg (364x405, 14K)

youtube.com/watch?v=nJpcTrqtAp0

Gay af desu

*jumbo

Whats the tax like?

>finish year 12
>become baker apprentice
I make like $800 a week as a first year apprentice which is rediculous good but only for a first year fucking apprentice. There’s no way to make good money in baking and the 3am starts are fucked I want a new apprenticeship as a fitter but there’s literally nothing around

I didn’t watch that I’m at a bar trying to get away from her.

I’m assuming it says don’t get married.

Kids...don’t get married.

Actually sounds pretty comfy. What are the taxes like in your state? Supermarket setup or local?

Honestly this is most loved I've ever felt in my life, and I don't care what you think. They even have a 3 year old I can see grow up without having to deal with a child on a day to day basis. It's like being married without any of the shit parts.

I'd rather be gay and make 70k under someone who loves me than be straight and make 42k under an incompetent moron

>Scene from Hot Shots

>Arab: I see you are no stranger to pain!
>Yank: I've been married
>Arab: *Wince*
>Yank: Twice!
>Arab: Oy gevault!

you know I have actually been thinking of getting a gubbernment job. then at least I'm not working for shlomo goldshekels but for the general people.

youtube.com/watch?v=L-7v_6uGlWQ

>then at least I'm not working for shlomo goldshekels but for the general people.

You know what kind of customers Jews like? The taxed kind.

reuters.com/article/us-usa-israel-statement/u-s-israel-sign-38-billion-military-aid-package-idUSKCN11K2CI

youtube.com/watch?v=BRAkobf-tVI

52% with 2 investment properties negative geared at a time you offset a decent amount of that. Self manage your 401k into crypto and cash that out too.

Kek, nice one user

>52%
If you ran farming on the side you could claim against tax with big fuck off tractors at least

this is why you always find a way to fuck your employer first. rule #1 i learned at 15 years old.

the employee employer relationship is a competition not cooperation

I'd rather not catch plebbit cooties.

Hate to kick a man when he's down but if they decided you weren't gonna move up and fired you then your performance was what let to that.

Seriously, 300k of revenue for 2.5 years? I've made my company 300k in a month.

You fucked the wife AND husband?

Never going to make it

yep.. being a NEET is the best... soon i'll be moving back in with mommy and i'll be saving upto 500 eur weekly from my free government autismbux. i can do whatever the fuck I want, say whatever I want without consequences, show my face at any protest if i wanted to. total freedom - no limit on the money i can make from shitcoins either.

Attached: satania pose.png (538x480, 170K)

>weekly
Well, I wish, make that monthly. Still good though

>study development for years
>get hired at 48k
>no raises
>no promotions
>dead end job
>have the skills
>can't get hired anywhere else

what the fuck man I'm about to get a job at the grocery store

>Hate to kick a man when he's down but if they decided you weren't gonna move up and fired you then your performance was what let to that.

Not necessarily. Many big engineering firms (GE, CH2M Hill, Northrop Grumman) are known for hiring engineers straight out of college and laying them off 3 or 4 years later when they start to get more expensive, then replace them with other 22-year-olds who don't know any better. It would not surprise me if accounting firms are doing the exact same thing.

>accountingfag (invoice monkey)
>stare at screens for 9 hours straight double checking tiny numbers
>was supposed to be 2 week trial period then full hire
>they decided to temp me for 3 months
>then decided to start the temp period clock one month into the gig, so it's a 4 month temp period
>1/3 of a year with no bennies, no vacation, no time off, and excluded from normal company events like meetings (getting paid to sit on your ass doing nothing) because I'm not actually an employee of the company
>had private office, was /comfy/ will be moved to cubicles next week
>will no longer be able to fart in peace or fuck around on my phone
>4 month temp period will end at end of this month
>if they don't offer perm with a pay raise and bennies I'm going to walk
>have eye strain and wrist strain every day from this shitty fucking job
This shit and they wonder why people go postal. What firm? Warn a nigger. Post bad reviews on glassdoor, smear their name as far and wide as you can.
desu I'm out of accounting in 6 more months, tired of the bullshit.

kek that pic lmao

I bring it 425k a month, get better junior

>Worked as lowly field engineer in a huge oilfield services company
>Tolerated 16-hour shifts, North Dakota in winter, Texas in summer, working with illiterate felons, and handling strange chemicals that nobody really understands
>Had a tarantula crawl on me while I was in bed once
>Smiled through all of it because they paid me $120K and probably another 15K worth of "perks"
>Manager strongly implied (without putting anything in writing) that he wanted me to commit fraud on the company's behalf
>Refused
>Laid off 1 week later

I can understand why these threads would make people decide not to work ever even without mommy's house. The satisfied wagie is the one sucking dicks.

I did that shit too

God it was hell

someone please acknowledge my plight

You lack leverage and they know it. Go on hackernews monthly hiring thread and get a remote job

Is this normal in accounting? My cousin works as an accountant for Delta and seems to like it so I always thought accountants were treated with respect due to their fairly difficult education, making them employees that companies compete over. Are accountants really treated like shit like this by accounting firms?

I'm imagining myself when I was graduating college looking for my first job. If a recruiter told me "You're going to be a temp for months with no benefits then we'll decide if we want to hire you" I would have taken my resume back.

If you have the opportunity to do so AND don't give a shit about what normies and family might think of it. Go for it. Set up some passive income, you can use the warosu Jow Forums archive for ideas. Freedom every day. All the time to do the things you love.

told my story too many times, but I was a chemist who committed fraud on behalf of my old company.

long story short, I'm in a starter position in finance now and I hope that company burns to the ground with all the good ol boys club inside it.

I will probably never get a salary that big again, but that was the most miserable year of my life. I'm an outdoorsman so I enjoyed the extreme weather and manual labor. Constantly being lied to, and working for a company that hates their employees was what ruined it for me. That and falling for their "Buy our stock at a 10% discount" meme.

Attached: SLB stock.png (784x421, 42K)

I'm not even in a firm, I went private. I hate my fucking job. It could be automated and I think they're trying (software engineer told them to fuck off and what they wanted, nearly full automation, was impossible.) My job is allocating literal pennies to proper accounts so some asshole "financial data user" up the line making 5x what I do to sit in "meetings" all day can look at the data for five seconds and gesticulate which division is more profitable. There is no sense of fulfillment and you stare at a screen for 9 hours straight killing your mind and body. If I wasn't just there for another 6 months, I'd throw myself out the window. I've already thought about it several times. The pay is garbage. You can move up, sure, but after years of wageslavery.
>"You're going to be a temp for months with no benefits then we'll decide if we want to hire you" I would have taken my resume back.
Literally every company does this bullshit now. It's a legal way to get out of paying bennies. Waht's happening now is that they have the entry level folk on a wash and discard circuit. Hire you, work you like a slave for 3 months, and fire you and take the next shitbag. You never learn enough skills to move up the chain since you're only doing the entry level grunt work. It's a deathtrap. I want to shoot them.
Oh here, I overheard the HR cunt yapping her mouth off today. "I have no idea what these jobs are, I just google the position and take the description from a job ad and reuse that." And this cunt is perm hire full bennies with higher pay than me. All because she got in before companies went full jew.
I don't know who we need to shoot, but if it doesn't happen soon we're going to all be the next Spain. This entire situation should be a fucking crime. Like I said, I'm out, I'll never work in accounting again. I don't care, I'll shoot myself sooner than work this bullshit again. 6 months and that's it. Everything was a lie and a trap.

Based on stories I heard from company men and employees of competitors who I befriended in the man camps, it seems pretty much every service company is like that. It was clear that they hire field engineers to be their scapegoats and they swiftly dispose of the ones that show too much integrity, or just suck at lying.

It's a different industry, but Disney does that too.

Yeah but I hated that job though. Never go into public accounting. I have some stories if the thread wants to hear it.

Currently working on the CPA and trying to start a meme tier passive income biz, so I guess I'm semi Neet.

It's a regional firm the odds of you working there are pretty slim desu

Fuck it
> Be in busy season
>Be working on a huge return for a huge client
>Entire team gets called into the manager's office, he's freaking out cause the partner wants the return on his desk in 2 days for review
>Dumb ass manager (he's like 31) is like "Hey guys, I know it's crunch time but if we work hard, buckle down, and get this return to Mike's desk by Wednesday then I'll take all you guys out for Steak at the nice place in town."
>none of us really gave a shit about the food/offer but we'll get just'd if we don't get this fucking return done so we act like we're all excited about the deal
>End up working till 1am that day and the second day I was the first to go home at 11:30PM, The senior on the project (one step above peon) stayed there all night and took a shower.
>somehow get the fucking return ready for partner review 12PM on Wednesday.
>Manager gives it to the partner
>Partner throws it in a drawer
>And proceeds to not look at it for two weeks
Just.

Revenue is based off of my bill rate. Not really much I can do about that apart from slaving for more hours. Junior associates don't make sales. That figure just came from my bill rate times the amount of hours I worked.

>we're going to all be the next Spain
>tfw spaniard

Attached: 1393175802508.png (542x602, 43K)

Holy fuck I'm mad on your behalf.
You know, just never give effort. I do 40 hours and that's it. I'd spit on unpaid overtime. That's the only good aspect of my job, no one does overtime.
Oh. yeah, sorry bro. we're heading towards that 90% unemployment and poverty wages too though, don't you worry.

I'm reading. I'll trade whatever oilfield stories I can think of.

>Retard tells pump operator to start a pump when the valve downstream of it is closed
>This puts lives in danger because he now put 20,000 psi of pressure inside of a pipe that is rated for 15,000 psi
>They try to cover it up like retards and fail
>There is a checklist that they have to fill out while opening valves to prevent this specific hazard
>I find all this out at the beginning of my shift
>Boss's boss asks me for the checklist
>It's nowhere to be found
>The retards forge one after the fact that looks nothing like the real ones
>Mr. Integrity (me) shows boss their checklist alongside all the other real ones
>They get fired and curse my name because, in their minds, the root cause of them getting fired was my refusal to lie for them.

> When I was a teenager, I was an absolute wagecuck. One of the finest, here's a good tale.
Me too but I had the sense to snap out of it at 19

Shit oilfield work would stress me out. Good on you for doing that.
Another story
>Used to have comfy cubes with 7 foot high walls.
>Basically meant no one would fuck with you as long as you got your work done.
>Later we move to an "open office concept"
>Go from nice mohongany desks and big cubes to some Ikea open office shit.
>Can see my coworkers screens at all times
>Can hear people clipping toe nails, chewing food, squeaking chairs etc.
>Can hear people talk about useless shit all day (boomer bosses don't allow headphones while work because it's a "communication barrier")
>Can't diddle on the internet because at any one moment 3 partners can see my screens and what I'm doing.
>After 3 months partner realize less work is getting done because people are fraternizing too much
>Gen X woman partner (has a copy of Lean In framed above her desk) Thinks it would be a good idea to institute a "3 minute limit" meaning you have to limit your personal conversations or get written up to HR.
I have more stories like this btw.

Kek, I'm in oil and gas accounting so I process invoices for you chucklefucks.
>accounting needs to know where to send the fucking invoices for approval
>they want us to magically know this by the signature
>at my last job they expected me to read the signature and deduce the name by magic
>implied I was an idiot for not being able to
>gave them a look; my own signature is literally two scribbles and ya'lls ain't much better
>this job the manager pushes them to print their fucking name alongside the signature
>the lazy field ops still can't be pissed to do that much
>we have a list of signatures with the name of the asshole who it is
>field ops have temps and low guys who wouldn't be on the list sign their shit
>still have no fucking clue who to send the fucking invoice along to for approval
>at this point I send it a random place because fuckit
But no really please kill yourselves, all of you. You have worse handwriting than a 4 year old and I have to manage to read that shit. Like no, it's impossible. Luckily i don't ultimately give a fuck and just put whatever. But it's on you shitbags.
Protip: cross the shit out and rewrite it if you make a mistake. Don't write ON TOP OF the mistake so it looks equally like a 1 or a 6. What did he mean? Whooooooooooo knows!
And people from wyoming are the worst. Hurry the fuck up, yellowstone.

I'm getting moved to a cubicle soon from a private office, will I be able to work on my own shit or will they see my screen? I guess it all depends... Is it /comfy/?
>clipping toe nails
wtf
>boomer bosses don't allow headphones while work because it's a "communication barrier"
My manager doesn't give a blazing fuck, we all have earbuds in at all times. The fact that I essentially get paid to listen to audiobooks is the only smug point this job gives me. Without it I'd be gone.

>3 years ago
>Lead network engineer at a big company
>(((Management))) decides to outsource all IT staff to India and migrate all infrastructure to random cloud hosts
>95% of IT staff is laid off except for team leads (which I was) and some helpdesk monkeys
>For the next year my job consisted of "overseeing the transition to our next-generation IT experience" AKA sitting on conference calls for 8 hours a day pretending to listen to Sandeep and Poodoo Patel bumble around
>Spend my time fucking around in the now empty IT area, studying for certs, playing vidya, etc.
>Subtly undermine the Poo's migration efforts and stretch the whole ordeal out 6 months longer than originally planned
>Get a fat severance package at the end of it all
>Over the course of the next year spend about 150 hours consulting for the company, fixing everything the Indians fucked up (at an hourly rate almost 3x my previous salary)

I heard from a non-IT friend that still works there that the company fired all the Indians and is trying to hire people back. If they ever call me I may ask for $300k a year for the hell of it and see what happens.

Legend

Stand outside for 30 minutes when it's -20 and windy wearing the poorly-insulated impact gloves you have to wear and let's see how good your handwriting is with a pen that keeps freezing on you.

Also, if engineers aren't making those reports, a significant portion of them are being made by people who don't know how to read and write.

I can't help laughing at the absurdity of enforcing a 3-minute conversation time limit, and how much lost productivity they would have, trying to time everybody's conversations.

This one didn't happen to me but it hit me in the feels

>Oil business is thriving in North Dakota
>New hiring class of 50 high school dropouts gets flown to ND to replace the 50 that quit last month
>Happens every month
>Price of oil drops a little bit
>Manager tells all of them that they are laid off, on their first day of safety training
>They all get paid for one day and plane tickets back home

So all the shit about working on oil fields being a guaranteed $100k straight of high school isn't true?

>the eternal boomer
How long before these guys drive all their businesses into the ground and crash the entire market? I don't even care about my portfolio getting wiped (indexfag) so long as the fire is big enough and pretty enough to be worth it. I want rooftop suicides.
>let's fuck over all our employees and replace them with barely literate ESL pajeets who worship toilets and live in a mud hut
Literally pic related. Accounting tries this shit too. Same results, crash and burn. Boomers will never learn.
Waaah, waaahhhhh. I go camping in that, eat a dick. My last vacation was walking around in a blizzard at sub zero all day long, literally 12-14 hours a day, and I was god damned /comfy/. You shitbags probably get paid damn good money, so deal with it. I read your invoices, you bought $300 worth of BBQ. Hope you enjoyed it.
>by people who don't know how to read and write.
I'd believe that. I've seen some shit man.
>pen keeps freezing
Motherfucking pencil. Russians already solved this.
So in other words, engineers are well paid tard wranglers.

Attached: genius.png (500x562, 456K)

>Motherfucking pencil. Russians already solved this.

Okay Mr. Booksmart Genius, please write checks to me in pencil. Your entire job revolves around passing around paperwork so you of all people should know the importance of making documents that aren't easily erased and manipulated.

>>let's fuck over all our employees and replace them with barely literate ESL pajeets who worship toilets and live in a mud hut
IT is just finishing up the same phase that software development went through about 5-6 years ago. C-levels need to cut costs and decided to outsource expensive skilled labor in favor of cheaper 3rd world country sweatshops because the 3rd worlders all have a metric fuck ton of certifications and experience. What they don't realize is that there are whole industries built around helping these clowns cheat on certification tests and building fake career histories and reference networks.
Inevitably, it all goes to hell and companies hire back local talent for more money than they had to pay them originally. In a few years all the upper management has changed and the new idiots start the process all over again.

Straight out of high school? Nah. The green hats make $17/hr at Schlumberger and they work Wednesday to Wednesday to jew the hourly employees out of overtime. They make around 75K. If you manage to stay in after 2 or 3 years, you break the 100K barrier. But keep in mind, you are literally one wrong step away from getting fired and you're working 84 hours per week for that.

>All I want is a comfy 30k year job and I'll be ok
>Fuck if only I had 60k a year
>God I really must get to 90k else I can't live properly

Why doesn't it ever end?

Who's gonna falsify work documentation? We don't even read half the shit you write.
>greg and george drove da big big biiiiig truck up da hill and put da trash in da twuck and drove the twuck back to the dummstur