You wake up in this building, realizing that you are now the president of Turkmenistan. What next?

Immediately liberalise and become a west-friendly low tax business haven.

Search a computer and google Turkmenistan

I would put 10% of the countries gdp to creating a bioweapon that would kill all humans

You're pretty much already Khan. The dictator of Turkmenkstan does whatever the fuck he wants. So much so, in fact, that he built a massive golden statue of himself even though everybody else is starving to death

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Based

More like city of poorly watered lawns.

take all money it has and flee the fuck out

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It wasn't as uptight as NK, but Ashgabat is full of weird stuff that rivals it.
Once you are out of the capital, its much more "real" and seems to be similar to the other stans and Iran (I have not been to those places but my dad has).
The carpets are really good there, I enjoyed the food, and the historical ruins are great, I found a viper at one.
There aren't many tourists so you often have things to yourself.
I think like in NK, you have to have a guide, our guy was a meathead who talked about working out at the gym and complained his wife had got fat kek, he also hated the new build apartments and said the commieblock ones are far nicer to live in.
Pic related was at Mary I think, all the smaller towns looked kind of the same except at the caspian sea, which was a weird giant empty resort. My dad got told off by a guard for walking along the promenade there, but I didn't, I guess because I rented a bike and cycled it.
The fire crater was really great too.

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youtu.be/mbm8_sj9R9s
Do this

>All these brainlets not knowing basic geography

Convert nation to Christianity.

I change the words for "bread" and the months of the calendar with words I make up, or my mum's name. Then I write a book demonstrating how all important people in history (Alexander III, Genghis Khan, Columbus etc) were Turkmens. Then I launch that book into space.

Call upon all Turkic countries for a jihad against christians in the caucasus

Say that to his face

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I order to build gigantic statues of me all over the country, then I let my secret service hand me a list of all opponents,, opposition leaders etc. and chose a few for public execution every month, mhhhh... let's see raising taxes, lowering wages
and I will hold a big speech around the lines that all Turkmenes have to bring sacrifices to make our country great and mighty again...., and I will
order all Turkmennes to learn my speeches by heart...., I'll need a new palace, too. Maybe I ask my buddy Erdigan for advice for that issue...

Sadly I can't ask Ceaucescu anymore.

First order of business, I resign and leave the country to my 10-year old concubine. Then, I say farewell and travel to Kazakhstan to stalk Aya.

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strange, they don't look very Turkish

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>turks
>turkmen
>turkish
>turkic

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Pretty much all the 'stans are rightful Iranian clay so I'd get annexed asap.

Based

>turks
>turkmen
>larping greeks
>turkic

fixed it

ricchione

Did they clear out all the monuments to Turkmenbashi or are they still there?

some were still there but they have probably cleared them out by now.

Are they gonna replace them with statues of the new president or what?

im assuming yes? idk tbqh

Didn't the guy use to call himself "The eternal president" or some shit? It's kind of ironic that they're knocking down his statues, lmao

Unironically

Have sex

I fuck all the fine brides.

Adopt a cryptocurrency, slowly overtime cut all government budgets by 90%, liberalize the economy entirely and turn it into a tax haven, allow citizens to purchase and sell any weapons while promoting the benefits of private gun ownership and personal liberty as a whole.

So... what Saparmurat Niyazov did, except 2.0

I dedicate the national holiday to myself, and replace a random array of common nouns with the word for cheese in the language, a mandatory stipulation enforced with the ministry of words that I put together

Be king of that country, readily adopt the culture while also improving the environment and economy of the country, basically be a good monarch :^)

How's he doing down in hell satan?

Oh and reduce the autocratic measures, make it more powerful, but also more freedom of speech and what not

I think he'd get along well with him

>Declare war on Israel
>Impregnate woman martial artists to create strong heirs
>Enforce every household to have a pistol and rifle (Compulsory training for every legal citizen including the woman)
>Set-up arrange marriage system for compatible partners in High schools

pass a law obligating everyone to performe scheduled dabbing sessions

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They mixed a lot with p*rsians

Modern day horse archer

Fuck yeah. Take Tiflis back too just to dab on this guy

YO CJ

Hey, here, I like your style.

Cringe, I'd just pick things up from where the other guy left off, except 10 times worse.

Rob Turkmenistan !!!

She live in Russia now with her rus. bf

Declare war against kurds

Look at a map and see where the fuck I am

you have no power mad central asian dictator president imagination

Lies. She lives in Los Angeles with her Turkish bf.

Teach everyone hardcore chemistry, biotech, engineering, mathematics, computer science... become Singapore + Switzerland of Asia.

Time to build a new khaganate.

>those eyebrows
100% oztürk confirmed

good good, but you need something zany as well, make them learn improv standup and you're on the way to central asian dictator president stardom

>You wake up in this building, realizing that you are now the president of Turkmenistan. What next?

I will sing a song about my horse Rovach.

youtube.com/watch?v=MbrxW3EGJIw