Confess

i really want to be a roman gladiator. i keep on having day dreams about it, even though i know the bloodshed is sinful and pagan. i want to Christianize gladiatorial fights, make them centered around christ.

I'm secretly being comfortable with being in chronic stagnation because I'm too afraid to throw myself into society and risk failure.

I wish that other countries recognize latinos as equals.

>don't worry i'm not hurting you because your my enemy i'm hurting to make you my friend

I don't wash my hands after shitting

literally this
ive always fought my friends when i was a little kid and i still want to do it. i dont want to hurt them because i hate them, i want to fight them because i love them

I'm getting free education here just so I can either "move back" to the country I wasn't born in or move to some other another first world country with

I'm a NEET and I will always be poor and useless

No joke look into eastern martial arts if you take out all the buddhist rabble about >seeking enlightenment through the mastery of an art / way of ___
It might become it good thing

>Canadian
Checks out

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I only post on Jow Forums when I am unemployed and depressed.

I jerk off to hard gay stuff but keep telling myself i'm straight

if jesus christ were reborn id hit on him and try to have him suck my cock

I hate my life and think about suicide almost daily but pretend to be happy and funny as a coping mechanism. Nobody knows that I've been crying myself to sleep for over 4 years

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I got high on fake weed, lost my sanity, and nearly raped my mother.

based

based

I'm trying to get Jow Forums but I just caved last night
>Ate an entire bag of spicy Doritos
>Ate an entire tub of ice cream and coated it with caramel
>Drank about a gallon of gatorade
>Made schnitzel and fried with way too much butter
FUCK I WAS DOING SO WELL I LOST 55 LBS FUCK I DON'T WANT TO STAY FAT BUT FOOD IS SO FUCKING GOOD FUCK

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What the fuck, all that in one day? What's wrong with you?

nigga you almost did hwat

Drink a lot of water and eat slowly, like chewing 20 times before swallowing.

i get off almost exclusively to extremely disgusting degenerate shit
id post an example but i dont want to ruin janny's day

I was doing so well. I had lost 55 lbs. I was doing so well and I was exercising for an hour and a half every other day. But my parents are both fat fucks and so they buy all sorts of bad shit like that. Last night at around 2 AM I opened up the freezer because I wanted a little treat, I let myself eat one bad thing a week. But I saw the ice cream and I decided that I would get a little. I got one scoop and ate it. I wanted more and more and it just kept devolving. I opened the pantry and saw the chps and went to town. Opened the fridge and there was all the fucking gatorade. Saw the meat and everything and just cooked like 4 things of schnitzel and ate them.
I literally gained like 5 lbs last night I"m not even joking.

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sounds gross

While that is disgusting, it's not going to add 55 lbs. Don't stop because of one detour, just jog for an extra 15 minutes tomorrow and stop beating yourself up about it.
You're gonna make it user.

Ah, I can actually kinda relate with that. I had a really hard time keeping off all the delicious crap my parents would buy when I lived with them. I used to be fat and struggled to lose weight because of that and only managed to drop to a healthy weight when I moved out. Still though, you went on a fucking rampage. I'm surprised you've even managed to lose that much.

Anyway, even if you gained 5 lbs, there's a good chance a lot of it is literally just shit in your bowels considering how much you ate, and not straight up 5 lbs of fat. In any case, don't make the mistake of letting the slip-up become an excuse to relapse completely. I did that once and ended up gaining everything I had lost and went back to square one. It's the fucking worst.

>I had lost 55 lbs.
Congrats! You can definitely keep it up if you've lost that much.

I have sex with men for money and really like it but I know God will not want me now until I change my ways and I don't know how to stop.

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Based

Forgive me father for I have sinned. I have replaced my fleshlight with a big jar of peanutbutter that I warm up slightly in the microwave each time and then fuck with a condom. At this point, I even prefer it to pussy.

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He can forgive you.

God isn't real so don't worry, but you should stop being a whore regardless.

>not just sucking god's dick so he lets you into heaven

i'm becoming gay but just a bit

Thank you brother
God doesn't think Canada is real either.
Think that might be too big and wrinkly
20 euros and I'll suck you off bro

>20 euros and I'll suck you off bro
I don't like cheap bitch

owo, how so

>implying god can't make his dick any way you want it
use your IMAGINATION

20 for a blowie is EXTREMELY adequate, figlio di putane
If I had imagination I'd be an artist and not a cock smoker

i thought about doing HEMA but thats too autistic

I promised to myself that i would to elections and vote but instead i've sat home and played Apex with Portuguese guy and discussed the dirty fetishes.

Thinking about joining the priesthood even though I don't believe in God, just so I can get access to housing and healthcare.

I do this as well

>20 for a blowie is EXTREMELY adequate
50 or nothing, you whore

You probably have to go through training

Most certainly (several years), and at least one year of what's basically an internship to see if you'd be a good fit before it.

But I've had 16 years of Catholic school, and I wanted to be a priest when I was young. So I know everything they want to hear and how to act and what they're looking for.

Do you know any Latin or Hebrew?

I took Latin in high school, but not any longer. It's not necessary though, most orders make you learn a second language but it's usually not Latin.

The Jesuits have you learn Spanish for instance (in the US). My former teammate's in the Jesuits, and he only spoke English before getting in.

I already confessed this before, but I used to pretend to be other australian anons and make them look like faggots/cucks. I also started the Gordon the Abo meme by hijacking some guy's thread.

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I larp as a black American on Jow Forums but I'm actually very pale and have blue eyes.
I sometimes go on Jow Forums just to tell other Americans that they are not white.

I think I'm autistic

I think being human-like is cringy. I don't like to remember times when I felt emotions or talk to someone about my personal things. It's the only things that keep me up at nights

I think I'll eat a whole chips bag today.

I masturbate 6 times a day

Femcel?

why christian need to confess to freakin priest?

That sounds like binge eating disorder

The unironic racism, sexism, and fascism bullshit on Jow Forums is getting annoying

I know it's Jow Forums it's supposed to be like this but constantly circlejerking this shit can lead to serious consequences. Look at the Christchurch shooting

I dont want all edgy humor to be banned or anything, I just want posters on Jow Forums to be aware of the impact they have of spreading "ironic" hatred and racism. It's so obvious most of the time it's not even jokes, it's just people projecting their low self esteem and emotional issues into hating minorities and women and the left

I get really sad when I'm the last poster in the thread and no one bumps it. I feel like I'm the reason why the thread 404s

When I was a teenager, I knew a really dumb and annoying druggie with too much of daddy's money at her disposal, so I sold her fake adderall. It started out as a prescription allergy pill I had that just looked vaguely like actual adderall; then, just to see how far I could push it, I moved on to literally selling her melatonin (which has the opposite of the effect amphetamines should produce). Amazingly, she never caught on, and I must have scammed her out of several hundred dollars before I finally decided to cut her off.

You know how Jow Forums collects and sells your personal information? It's basically that.

To use the service they get to sell your personal info.

I'm a virgin and I've had a girl in love with me for 6 months now and still haven't had sex.

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That isn't really something to confess about, just wait until marriage.

Germans are the most bullied group on Jow Forums and it hurts so much.

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I'm a top but I have secret fantasies about getting gang-raped by BBC.

You aren't a Unitedstatesian, Hans

You sound like a faggot, i can see why you would get bullied a lot.

>You sound like a faggot

There is literally nothing wrong with admiring and appreciating beautiful uncut twink dick.

Int is passivly hating us on int, that's worse.

I would if she was a virgin. and I'm confessing that I'm a pathetic cuckold.

I would actively love you in Munich.

I was supposed to not have oil today (begome orthodogs :DDDD) so I was eating bread as normal but I noticed the bread had oil in it on the ingredients list

also I jacked off to vore yesterday

I'm completely empty
Boring, useless, have nothing interesting going on in my life
I can't imagine what my life will be like 5 years from now, because it'll probably be exactly like how it was today