/cum/ - Canada USA Mexico

are you ok with being a virgin?

Not sure what you’re talking about. I’ve done that literally every time and there’s never been a problem. You’re doing it wrong if they’re not overwhelmed with sensory experience to the point that they’re not thinking about what’s going on

Just be yourself :^)

yes

eh

No one wants to admit it but an enema’d asshole still smells like shit. You clear out most of it, but you’re just left with residual poo-water instead

a lil poo smell is alright. just light a candle and put a blanky down to wash when you're finished.

Gf and I are getting high and the gf turned indie music on so she’s starting to feel comfortable

All modern women are whores
Especially western women
This is pretty much a fact

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I've done it a lot but it got sketchy a couple of times. A little bit ago I hooked up a 19 year old college chick with the whole i only dated one guy ever and he was boring thing going on. I don't normally try with girls that young I'm 27 but she was fine. It got heated on the couch and i grabbed her and carried her to my bed tossed her on it and ripped her clothes off. She was moaning and sucking on my throat and shoulders the whole time. Afterwards she said she liked it and never got fucked like that before but then literally the next day she was calling me a creep and didn't like how aggressive i was. She was a """christian""" and started sending me a lot of aggressive shit larping like she didn't want sex
I don't wanna deal with that shit.

Can’t believe I volunteered for another night of toil. At least I’m somewhere else doing something kinda new to me.

Am I gay if I find lesbian porn too boring to watch?

>call themselves """christian"""
>go out and fornicate on the daily
Why do women do this?

Um if you watch porn you are Gay

Me? I can only get off to women masturbating because everything else is gay

what've they got you doing

why did you capitalize gay?

I feel the same, if I can't see part of the vag while a dick slides in, it's not very arousing
ALSO:
The pervasive fake moans in porn are really dumb and I often turn the sound off

his phone autocorrected his name

Gotta pick your bihs carefully bud
For me? Yeah it’s art hoes

It's part of his gimmick/posting style

Are you insinuating that I’m phoneposting??

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Imagine not being a phoneposter

>filename
It's ok I use iOS too

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They have to find a way to delude away their awful behavior. I had her on snapchat. She got pregnant so soon after I hooked up with her I was really worried but it was some other dude thankfully. They are christian because it means she can be slut but so long as she rationalizes them all as mistakes she can still be a god loving woman. I swear you find a girl in a bar with crucifix hanging on her tits it's the easist hookup you will find especially if she talks about religion and isn't just wearing it so you look at her tits

>gimmick/posting style
>not going full schizo-mode, adopting multiple personalities to make yourself completley unrecognizable

I am going to abstain from masturbation for all of August!

I've done that since January.

Onwards to wizardmode!

Who were the greatest American Presidents ever and why?

Who would win in a fight
A 5 year old or a 95 year old

Dolan Blumfph because he stands by our Greatest Ally when no one else will!

I find art hoes hot to fuck. Only been with 2 and it was one time things. Art hoes have some grand delusion they subscribe to and you have to fall in line.
For my situation its jew girls. I've fucked so many it's a statistical anomaly but they make the move on me first. I don't have a thing for jewish girls but idk man something about me they like. Im sick of fucking jews and wh*tes. I really really want to creampie a latina and black arab mena girls too

Almost definitely the 5yo

ADORBS

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Running a pipeline.

Is this the Alberta equivalent of running a train?

Ummm no sweatie

sounds interesting

How old are you? You must be young twenties

Okay
5 year old or 85 year old

bullshit. there's 95 year olds that run marathons. a five year old doesn't have the mental capacity for murder. just choke the cunt.

5 year olds know to go for the genitals and to bite.

The proportion of 95yos who run marathons is probably lower than that of 5yos who run marathons lol

they're too clumsy to land a solid blow. have you ever played with a toddler? it's like a big doll that manages to run around somehow.

I don’t know why art hoes love me but they do, and I love them. Hard to accept a normalfag bih anymore

5yo =/= toddler

>the exception is the rule
the one 95 year running a marathon obviously represents the other 99.9% that are so frail that if they trip and fall it's a death sentence. that are so demented and incoherent that you could murder them with a fly swatter with no resistance. that approach driving like they are actively seeking death.

I'm a 6

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if you like art thots and they like you then why give a fuck. rawdawg those art bitches

I’ve only ever dated art hoes
Even lost my virginity to one

janny has forsaken us

I do :)

Ain't nothing with that

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30 in a month.

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*sip*
ahh

whatever floats ur boat

You’ll be my age one day just you wait

Absolutely based
30 in 4 months

I’m 28 years old, almost 29
I’ve been married since college

Umm no gramps you’ll always be older than me

Keep forgetting my quilt in the dryer down stairs. Gonna be another night of sleeping in the fetal position to stay warm.

Just go get it...

It’s too far and too late

Scared?

Wish I had some zo

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can't stop me

why yes how could you tell

Lol

literally cried
imdb.com/title/tt3360148/

is it a feel-good kind of movie or nah
don't like really sad movies tbqh

yippee kai-yay, motherfucker

dunno wat to tell you
made me cry

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sneed

Chuck

>bottle in the kitchen just shook and almost fell over
>nothing else moved, nobody else is awake

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Test

Just the wind bro

>first the bottle
>now I had a silverfish crawling on me

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i can now post without proxy

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feet are dirty

youtube.com/watch?v=pZCN2T1XDt8

Those look pretty clean

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don't see wats so appealing about this tbqh făm

Idk just makes me wanna succ

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post your desktop wallpaper

You first.

Thinking about running circles around the house as fast as I can.