/brit/

>he's monolingual

可哀想

Can’t wait for the English civil war after Brexit and for the runtlets to come BEGGING for the allegiance of the Kingdom of Scotland

Might take pity on them

Might not

you're gammon

was good lad, I was in Adelaide as that's where my mrs was studying so wasn't the most exciting time. South Australia was comfy, Melbourne is acceptable. Sydney is a shithole.

malding

Priscilla fans are weird people.

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What job?

Priscilla is a gammon

rate my lewis martinez portrait

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legally changing my name to The Wild Man Of Mongolian Throat-Singing

mad how this is "the goal", can't think of anything more grim than being high up at "megacorp 5000", not to mention you're probably in london so have a significantly decreased standard of living compared to deano living up norf on £21k

based

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chicken runtlets chips and peas for supper

dislike gammon
stinks

wow that's so interesting did you also clip your toenails today?

gf just sent me this

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Looks like Malaponte
A white Italian man

spreadsheets would be fine if excel wasn't such a dogshit piece of software

Well it's something I have experienced with English. E.g. I am more likely to ask to see a store clerk's manager and act like a jerk if I am speaking in English. One time I even started filming a poor ISP employee like yanks do then realized wtf am I doing. I also tend to think more rationally in English because it's the language I do science with.

>Top ranking generic Oxbridge grad scheme ----> promoted to outside job
>45k + 10k bonus + perks
>Live in central London, can't believe this is it forever

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alri povvo. try chilling in the hills around sydney harbour and say it's grim fucking most beautiful landscape i've ever lived in.

remember when that londoner reckoned london could beat yorkshire in a war if everyone else stayed out of it?
still laughing at that one

the za

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bill gates is the devil

got me a job at asda and a 1 bed council flat in wythenshawe for 60quid a week
buzzin
sick
mint

I am on about 15k more in London, in a slightly smaller than up north flat share with gf, but everything is expensive (eat a lot less takeaway and eat outs although that's not a bad thing), walk to work, see lots more cultural stuff, still fucking despise it.

I'm nots ure I actually like life in the UK.

Oddjob about to sling his hat.

sheeeeit

If you use the terms 'the Mrs' or 'my Mrs' she's probably cheating on you

youtube.com/watch?v=p6l3Lh2cb_g

original video was the difference between them in high school and them as adults. then this version adds them another 20 years on and it's deep as fuck

never went to the hills so didn't comment. I specifically hate the city.

It's a insult?

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learn to tell people to fuck off and how to say no
learn 'teflon shoulders' is not actually an insult

there, work stress down 90%

there's a white hart in brum too
you do realise there is only 15-20 pub names that are in every town and city

screaming

Did you move back through choice? What was it like? How easy would it have been to stay?

what if i call her my property

>One time I even started filming a poor ISP employee like yanks do then realized wtf am I doing
barrelling over in laughter imagining this
just working at a shop and some brown bald foreign manlet with a ridiculous French accent whips out his phone and starts recording you, acting aggressively

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reading about shipping disasters de lads

All Microsoft software is shit. But that's all Normies know and you're forced to interact with them.

can I trade you?

EEEEEXXXXXIIISTENTTIIIIIIAAAAAALLLL CRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIISSSIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSS REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

grim

*farts on it*

damn this dude don't look so good

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Is durham a good uni?

"cultural stuff" is a meme, oh wow you've been to the museum of african goat fucking oh my god so cultured

About as cultured as deano down the pub off his face on double JDs and coke on friday night mate

Emma?

Too try-hard. Just say my gf/partner/significant other/fiancée/wife depending on the context

>All Microsoft software is shit. But that's all Normies know and you're forced to interact with them.

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lol looks a bit like a mixture of him and his brother

priscilla was certainly violently nonced from a young age

>yes bro need any haze?

>wythenshawe
hmm

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OH NO NOOOOOO LOOK AT HIS HEAD

what if you say 'my significant other'

LMAO

based. imagine just being able to appreciate your life for what it is and not be a faggot who constantly has 'existential crises' or whatever about nothing

I am lad, but if I don't do my work there are huge knock on effects.

I was unironically happier with no money sat in my house posting here all day in unemployment.

>Finally get my own people to manage
>Think it will be a walk in the park and fun, get them to do the leg work and just delegate
>They actually just moan about every bit of change
>Fail to show intiative
>COmplain constantly about wanting more money or promotion despite being nowhere near good enough to get it
>Resent young person telling them what to do after they've been there years

Fuck sake.

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The Greek Alan

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most depressing year for /brit/ gimmicks

*films you*

Is this a fucking edit

Lol fuck off I still got my way but yeah wasn't my most glorious moment

if (poster == alan) {
cout

it just baffles me why someone would put an unflattering selfie on a general where people would ridicule you even if you were a 10/10

what were you thinking alan

what do you think every time you do it, the abuse can't be good for your mental health

I moved back as we both had 1yr visas, and she has another year of undergrad in england (I graduated already). Shit isn't cheap in Australia, but it is compared to UK purely because of the bonkers conversion. We payed £80 a week for a 2 bed flat just outside of Adelaide. You have to do a mandatory 3 months ish of farmwork to renew your visa, I knew my mrs was leaving so I couldn't be fucked picking grapes in 40 degree summer so I sacked it.

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bloody hell alan

I'm on about at my old shit northern town I'd go to same places every weekend, do the same things.

In London there's always a new museum or new band playing or new weird thing to do, London Eye, Westminster Abbey, all that meme stuff.

*gives you a taste of your own medicine*

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lol how fucking grim is manchester??

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Ever become mates with someone on a night out and you're not sure if they're gonna be a good mate for life or end up hitting you at some point in the night?

met a mad scouser like that yesterday

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Parsons_(rocket_engineer)
some poeple are just on a different level to the rest

WHY HULLO LADDIE

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yeah heres the original

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Come on lad, tell us more, do you regret it, couldn't you worm your way into an office job and get them to sponsor you or whatever?

Sounds nice though lad, is UK that grim in comparison?

Lol I see this motherfucker on my twitter often saying how this or that is Lindy. Taleb created a whole class of insufferable twats

alan is an alpha male simple as, he has a gf and a life in another country hes literally more successful than 90% of /brit/ and this board in general. why would he care about our opinions? proof is in the pudding

need the embrace of a woman

FUCKING SQUEALING hahahhhhahahahahahahhahhhhhahaha

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i am here, i have arrived

ask your mother

Nassim is more ebased than you to be honest.

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lmao the guy is a whiny beta constantly crying here about his delusional "smackdowns" and the like of people. he has to go to thailand to pull for heaven sake