Yesterday was my uncle's wedding and I fucked up socially so bad

It's impossible not to sperg in a room full of people you barely know

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So what? It's just your uncle you stupid sperg

it is also problematic because many ask me what do I do in my free time. And I can never actually answer this question.

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>I was also sitting between 2 peoples who were having a conversation about something I know jack shit about so I couldn't join. And there weren't many empty chairs around so I just kinda had to sit there looking around like a retard.
>. And then he made jokes with me and I just kept saying "WHAT?" every time because I couldn't hear him. I said it for like 5 times in a raw so. Then I saw his face and I realized that he realized that I was a total sperg.

These happen to me a lot to

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5-10 weddings a year.
5-10 funerals a year.
2 Eids a year.
So you could see why I wouldn't want to sit quietly. I try to go out of my way to talk to people but I lack the skills for that shit man

Just dont go autist

what does you even do in a situation where 2/3 people are talking a conversation and you're just sitting there unable to join them because you know nothing about what they are talking about? Do you just let them acknowledge you as a brainlet??

I used to not go a lot but I regret it and relatives generally dislike it when I'm not there. So I go and will go. But not a lot because I'm still not social.
There is a culture of shame when you ignore your relatives. "He thinks he is too good to come! he thinks he is better than us! he is not a real part of our family. etc..."
although admittedly not many think about me kek. The problem is my siblings always visit and go so when they are there everyone asks about me. And when they see me ask me why I don't visit or some like my siblings.
So it is the better choice to attend these weddings or whatever.

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>avoiding family events
Whypipo alert

Choukran for the chuckle lad.

when they see me they* ask me why I don't visit or come* like my siblings

>cousins start talking about their job, cars, sex, sports
>you're a virgin neet who can't drive and don't care about football

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Doesn't seem that bad, bro. It's not like they will hate you or something.

welcome habibi

I know but I can't live my life being seen as a sperg. This is so wrong man

Pretty fucking accurate. This is me yesterday and this is how my life goes. Except I do drive and have a car.

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>hamad
>ahmad
>mohammad
the meme is true, its like you dont even try when naming each other.
protip never adress someone by name unless you are absolute shure about it. but learn who people are, what they work with and other stuff instead. the dude who drives a land rover, has a blond wife, live up north and works at a bank sticks better to your memory than just john, and it gives something to conversate about in the future.
t. functional autist.

sit still. smile and nod.
be on the lookout for people who want to talk to you, try and avoid them and dont make eye contact, as that will mean they will acknowledge you see them.
if they try and talk to you, keep conversations brisk and less about personal matters to avoid revealing you don't know their name, or that you work full time job scratching your own balls instead of earning a living.

Bring up broad, open questions and topics, or keep the conversation on the person you are talking to

bring out your phone and ask how to spell their name. say you want to add them to your contacts and bam, you got their name!

use this advice wisely, padawan. with great awkwardness comes great responsibility

I get that too

In my mind: 'Because you're the sort that asks questions like that'

based professionals

how do you shrug it off when they say and ask things like that to you

>how do you shrug it off when they say and ask things like that to you
I'm not shrugging it off, more just being annoyed. I never know what to actually say. Normies irritate and confuse me

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Just tell them the truth

the truth is that I don't like visiting them or spending time with them

The truth about why you don't like spending time with them

that's a bad idea
because typing behind a screen is easier than talking in person

Threats like this proves we are all same on inside

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>because typing behind a screen is easier than talking in person

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if you are atistic and have social anxiety like me you need to learn a few tricks. i hate family dinners, work gatherings and the stuff but i cant avoid it, it has to be done. so why worry about it before instead of learning the code behind it? most of the time you can just sit back and go with the flow, say shit like
>hmm
>shure
>yeah
>did you really?
>agree
never come with your opinion unless they ask for it, most people want to be heard they dont really care what you have to say. when things get more personal its still a code that can be broken down. why did ahmad get that response from hamads joke? dont try to copy it but break it down and understand why ahmad said that and why hamad responded how he did. learn the easy route through all social events like this and you might even find yourself as the sentre of attention, not like that is a desired position.

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based. although I never worry about them and just go. However everytime I'm done with them I have fucked up in a way or another. I just tell myself that the next time will be better.

Feels great not having a family anymore. I don't have to attend all these shitty events.
When I became alone I was a bit sad and then I slowly realized that having a family is not worth the trouble. I live better than when I had to deal with social events.

how did you abandon your family? did you migrate to france while everyone stayed back home?

No they're all dead. In Europe we don't have large families like in the middle East. So if your parents and a few oncles die you're alone.

How do we stop dwelling on all our social fuckups every time Jow Forums?

I'm sorry to hear that. Hope you're doing ok

Yes I'm fine. In Western countries you don't really need a family. And I'm quite rich.

Unironically oof, I feel you user
I used to be the same but I got better. Being sperg ain't ez, espcially if you're basically on your own with no one to ask about stuff like how to dress and stuff. At least I found it's easier if you have someone to ask about spergy stuff even if they are spergy themselves.

Don't let it hold you down though. You might just have legit autism and it's just difficult for you to deal with social situations. But you can learn from experiences like this. Try to understand what you did wrong and try to do it better next time. If your own family hates you only cause you're kinda autistic then they are assholes anyway. It's ok to be weird if you're willing to improve yourself.

not to brag but i have perfected it too good. people call me and want to go out with me, thinking im their best friend and shit. i just made our interaction as pleasant as possibly, i dint mean anything with it. now leave me alone.

>tfw dealing with smug extended families

What do you do for a living? Beside your free time that is?

I go attend thos gatherings because I want to improve myself Thanks user

lmao smug how?

I don't really work. I work full time job scratching my own balls instead of earning a living. But I will soon enough.

There's the problem.
You see when people stop socializing they forget how to socialize, when people don't exercise their muscles are going through something called atrophy.
If you don't use it you lose it.

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Sure no problem. I know it's a meme but I've learned that "just be yourself" means "try to feel comfortable being yourself, even if you do happen to behave inappropriately. It's okay, that's just who you are and you can always improve".
Family is a bit difficult cause you can't choose the people you're hanging out with. So just remember, there's certainly people who like you even with your weirdness, but these people might just not be in your family.
That's how it is for me at least. My family is extemely normie and doesn't understand why I don't want to dance (and by dancing I mean "going apeshit on the dancefloor at 2am while Despacito is blasted at a ear deafening volume). I just accept that they won't like me the way I am and that's ok. I'm not gonna pretend to be someone else cause neither do they so why should I?

thank fucking god I don't have to deal w a big ass family all the fucking time, fuck being Arab

makes sense. you have to put yourself out there

those are some really good points. I had some spergy friends and normie friends in high school but the ones that I've built a strong connection with and became my best friends were the normies who now live in different cities. I should have strengthened my friendship with the spergs.

Actually if have a big family you get used to it and it will be hard for you to imagine it any other way. I feel like having a small family would be depressing.

The kind that keeps ghosts as pets.

Eh there's different flavour of spergs. I've known plenty of them who I didn't get along with well. And some normies are understanding and know that not everyone is a normie or wants to be one. My family are the kind of people who say "lmao ur just shy xd cmon your gonna love it trust me" no matter how many times I told them that I don't like doing that. It's really stupid

you missed the part where you hajis spontaneously combust
but ok
next time perhaps

about family, dont volunteer for stuff, but make shure your contribution is noticed if you do so. be the stronk guy not the volcel if someone in your family ever needs help to fence their property or some shit. if you are fat now they will not have noticed and it didnt really care, but if you loose 10kg by the next time and work out a little they will notice and give you compliments.

There was this one guy in high school who was basically the fat virgin of me. Or really I was actually better socially then him. Judging from his social media he is still a sperg. We used to hang out sometimes after high school But eventually we stopped. I was never the one to tell anyone to go hang out. I was the one to get asked. So when he stopped asking I just never went with him anymore. I tried reaching out to him years later but apparently he blocked everyone he knew from high school and changed his number. What a fucking sperg. He really was my best buddy in high school and we were still very similar even after it. Sad that he is out of the picture now. Can't really call him to ask him if he wants to hang out anymore.

>keeps ghosts as pets

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>tfw I pretended to be drunk in college after someone passed me some beer because I was so afraid to actually drink it (alcohol scared me back then)
>tfw it was so obvious to everyone I was feigning drunk

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my uncle's house is like 10 minutes away from mine. And this Wednesday he was away for work and his wife and kids were at his house. He told me that there is no water in his house and that I should see what's the problem. And I spent like 3 hours fixing that. His wife thanked me.

Besides I'm underweight and one of my uncles talked about that with me yesterday. He said that my brother is buff and goes to the gym and that I should do the same. It was a terrible conversion because I was bad at it but I told him that I did have the intention to gain weight. And I do.

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Black magic shit

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Now that's some cringe. Hope you see a psychiatrist

I've cracked the code bros. Just have the most comfortable expression on your face ever always. Just always be like you're comfortable with your body and these social situations. Just fake like you're a Chad and not afraid of any social situations. But be careful, NEVER open your mouth especially never given any opinions or they will know from your voice and opinion.tjst you're fake chad and a sperg. It works great trust me.

if you never talk people would think you're a weirdo or you're retarded

>do you say anything other than "yeah" user?
does this happen where someone is talking to you about something and you have no idea how to add anything so you just keep saying "yeah" to everything they say?

I saw several but they were all bad. I noticed one was playing Tetris while I was telling her my problems.

you are not on Jow Forums by accident

Incel: the post

No you can speak neutral sentences that are normal as fuck like "what's up", "Food's good" "Been busy these days" "Weather's been nice". Anything sentences spoken is very neutral tone with neutral emotions are fine, but don't ever go overboard like smile too much like a retard or give great descriptions or tell stories. Those will fuck you up.

I can also nod

lmao I'm self conscious about this shit so I always try to keep the conversion going or add something. Which doesn't end well most of the time. Most of the time when they are telling me a story I just ask questions or try to hype the story up or something.

true

true

now this makes sense. But it really sounds like an endurance test. Sometimes people will have a conversation with you or ask you questions. You have to know how to carry yourself.

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This
Don't open your mouth ever unless absolutely necessary
Be confident, try to always look like you know what you're doing all the time and not be akward

Let this be a lesson to all incels ITT
Act and look like a chad, try not to make it look too forced though, some people can see right through it and you really don't want that

People might not hate you but they won't like you either if you act like this. Then you're just a hollow shell of a person: maybe pleasant, but in the end any interaction with you becomes meaningless. I mean if that's what you want then it's fine. But personally, I think it's better if 2 out of 20 people actually like me for who I am than 20 people who don't hate me but forget about me 20 minutes later cause I acted like a literal NPC with no personality.
I suspect it's just a form of cope because you've made bad experiences with social interaction. And I don't mean that as a call out, I just want to point out that it's unhealthy to emotionally detach from people like that. Sometimes you gotta risk people not thinking well of you even if it's difficult.

Questions are basically magic when it comes to conversations. Every question inclines the person to answer, and it doesn't have to be meaningfull questions. Everything can lead to the other person to be reminded of a story (or yourself). Like, if I imagine a wedding situation, you could ask about something seemingly inane like "Do you like this cake?" which could then lead to asking if their mother baked often which can then lead to all kind of other questions that can bring the conversation to completely different (potentially more interesting) places. That's why giving one-word answers like "Yeah" or "Guess so" are bad because they don't lead anywhere. Try to answer in a whole sentence or two

I have sperged out so much in front of family that I don't think they like me that much or at least they are very disappointed. Once when I was in sauna with my brother and father and immediately after I left they both started to talk shit about me. I am afraid to think about what they think about me.

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you scored 10 points with you uncle there. and weight doesnt always mean strength. i just recently, like 20 min ago, i watched a fire and rescue competition, thats stuff that matters in real life. the best woman was equal to richard skog, former strongman and norway winner twice, world champion 4th best. a girl half his size did the same shit on the same time. kids at 25 or so beat him by a minute. size is nothing if you got strength and know how to use it.

Bro, my uncle got drunk at a wedding when he was 13 years old, recorded a porno film over the only vhs copy of my baptism and threatened to kill my other uncle after he got mad at him for growing weed for the Hells Angels in his field. You're not that bad.

one of the highest IQs ITT

your family can be disappointed but it is not right for them to hate you if you've done nothing wrong

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It sucks when your own family thinks like that since you can't just easily abandon them. With friends you can just end a friendship but your dad is always gonna be your dad. I have the same problem
Only thing I can say is focus on the people who like you and disregard those who don't. I know many people disagree but in the end you don't owe your parents anything, or at least not as much that you need to change who you are. It's a parent's job to accept their child and try to be understanding. If they don't do that they just fucked up as a parent.

It's why I distanced myself from my mother. I felt how all she did was making me worse for not being the way she wants me to be, especially cause I can't change many of these things. She would often ask "why are you so clumsy and forgetful? Just stop doing that, it's not hard." But she's wrong, it's incredibly hard because I am not her. And instead of letting her making me feel bad for no real reason I just distanced myself from her because I want to cut her negative influence out of my life.

It's ok to be you, user. You can try to change if you want, but it shouldn't be cause of your father or whoever. You're your own person now and your dad doesn't own you.

fucking based uncle. lmaoing at him being drunk at 13 and recording a porno at a wedding

Haha thanks user but I don't think I'm smart. I just learned a lot about myself recently thanks to my friends and about some other people I look up to and I want to share the things I learned cause maybe it'll help others like it helped me. I'm feeling a lot better about myself than I did a few years ago even though I still have a long way to go (I still have a lot of issues, personally and emotionally)
Life is hard to understand, especially as a sperg, so maybe all someone needs is just reading something that may seem obvious but has never really formed as a thought in your head. Stuff like that can really help cause thoughts are vague but written words aren't