200+ applications, no responses.. how the FUCK do people get jobs?

>Anime, Manga, ESports, Twitch...
Oh user, are you even trying?

Attached: 1542462008240.gif (360x346, 218K)

put the name of the company you redacted, makes you look like you were fired so hard you dont want anyone to know how it happened remove NYSE tickers, DELETE anime, manga, skipping rope crap
use a template that has bright colours, learn to write interesting 2 paragraph cover letter to add to the application

god speed, user

>those interests
REEEEEKS of autism

Obviously this is a troll, but don't include your interests especially if they are that shameful. Don't put ticker symbols or made up job titles/exagerated descriptions. Definitely don't list a job and tell them you only worked there for 1 month or they will (rightfully) assume you're terrible.

1&2 are good advice, but don't add color that's childish. There are other ways to make a resume stand out, like good typography or interesting design.

t. Graphic designer

>company name confidential
I love reading bullshit when I'm looking to fill a position.

>1. Half your additional info is cringe, change that.
>3. Add some color to this

>use a template that has bright colours, learn to write interesting 2 paragraph cover letter to add to the application

What do you mean by this? I'm not very creative with colors or design. What templates do you recommend?

Maybe, I've found adding a little bit of color helps. Could also be that I was entry level, so much more applicants for each role, colors help in that case I'd think. Prob right about more serious roles

>those interests
No, please God tell me this isn't real.

Attached: ea0643aaeeffb9bd6004b1d94e17443b.jpg (236x238, 7K)

Something as simple as this:

templates.office.com/en-us/Simple-resume-TM00002110

All I ever did was change the headers like that to get a little attention. Don't go too hard on the looks, keep it simple. I made that mistake once, and lost my interview with Tesla as a result (got it, then lost it, not gonna bother and explain).

Attached: 938A2DEE-D845-4277-843B-DDF9F957D0C8.jpg (250x206, 7K)

What the hell are you supposed to put for interests? Don't companies want to see what you do outside of work so you stand out as an interesting person?

What, am I supposed to put fake shit like traveling, cooking, photography, woodworking?

Attached: de15df26e9bf61c4f5672a08dc60a50b.jpg (499x481, 27K)

This is bait

I wouldn't hire you to mop my shit.

>having an ‘Interests’ section on your resume

Obvious bait but I’ll bite

Absolute topkekkery. No employee cares about your interests. Try the Indeed Template. It’s gotten me several jobs over the last few years.

LOL @ all the newfags replying to this sincerely

Employer*

I think most of the anons here know it’s obvious bait, but there are unironically people on here that believe a resume is supposed to look like this.

Sometimes you gotta have fun with the bait. It could help autists.

I wouldn't fake shit, I'd just put less. Like, instead of skipping rope I'd put 'fitness', and I would totally take out Twitch, Youtube, Netflix and imageboards -
Twitch, Youtube, Netflix and Jow Forums, as much as I love using them, they're wastes of time. They're things we do to make the day pass. You wouldn't put "Watching TV" as an interest. It's like putting "breathing" as an interest. There is literally nothing of substance there.
Anime and Manga is also difficult - anime is a whole genre with its own respectability and all that, but it's also a genre where you can literally, literally binge watch seven hundred episodes of a show and get nothing of substance. So I'd take that out,
Instead of Manga I'd put 'Reading', just sounds better, makes it seem like you read more outside of like Bleach and Death Note.
Leaving in Video Games is okay, I think,
And cryptocurrencies is okay, yeah.

"Conventions" is a bit shit too.

So I'd leave it at Fitness, Reading, Video Games, Cryptocurrencies. You really don't need anything else, and as it currently is you're advertising yourself as someone who wastes a LOT of time.

Thanks, yeah it does make sense trimming it down a bit. Appreciate the constructive criticism user

No worries man. Someone suggested the indeed resume, that’s probably a great shout, I’m using the Novoresume template right now which has more colour and looks really snappy like you put lots of effort into it when really you’ve done fuck all. It does require your photo though, maybe that’s just a European thing.

Take interests out all together. No employer cares or gives a shit.

This isn't a game anymore, this is real life. Start acting professional.

I'd also completely remove gamestop and that property management job. It's a huge red flag you're working 3 jobs concurrently.

>falling for this

Attached: 1520896756861.png (553x585, 121K)

>I'd also completely remove gamestop and that property management job. It's a huge red flag you're working 3 jobs concurrently.

That's my experience. What else am I supposed to put there?

LOloLOloLolO
>Interests: anime, manga, video game, esports, imageboards
so... there you have it, that's why no one's hiring you

>Fund manager
aka your shitcoins
>property manager
aka you're renting out part of a house
>interests
lel

top keks aside you need to try to meet these people in person and speak with them directly prior to an interview about how you saw the job and wanted to stop in to greet them. Other than that, exhaust your connections to find a job for you.

I would never hire an anime faggot.

>Assisted clients in making informed decisions
Trash. The reason why you got no responses is because it's too generic: try to tell a story of success and how you did great things in your previous positions.

No one gives a shit about that, what you should say instead is how your work made tons of shekels to the company.

> Met and complied with legal regulations
This is so fucking vague... what regulations?

Remember to give some numbers and remove the shitty "Interests" section.

People want to see you can get a job and KEEP IT. I’d value a janitor more that showed up everyday on time with 10+ years than a Yale graduate who works at GameStop for 1 month then quits and tries Walmart.

You need to start personally talking to the owner of the business. Having a lot of jobs looks worse than having one job and sticking to it.

Find a job but then start your own business. Also hope you bought link.

Just don't be fat and ugly

>Interests: Anime, Manga

This has to be a joke right?

>Lie.s about being a fund manager and a property manager.
>Worked as a cashier at Wal-Mart and Gamestop.
>Went to Yale so probably has rich parents .
Did I miss anything?

Attached: laughpepe.jpg (229x220, 10K)

Well, maybe it wasn't a joke and maybe you truly are THIS autistic. Nobody wants anime sperglords who don't understand other humans working for them. You literally just told them you're a gigafaggot hentai jerking, e-celeb fawning fucking cancerous retard. You shouldn't even have a job. I hope someone who's less of a disgusting loser gets whatever jobs you try to apply for.

>everyone falling for the obvious bait

My main office is over in Vancouver WA. Heh, small world. I know that area well.