Why am I not getting any calls back from job applications?

You don’t really have any relative experience for the degree you have.

Casino security deals alot in business law like liability and such

If you say so user.

>I can be a security guard and collect mandaring oranges spread over a whole A4 page

Attached: the-joker-laughing[1].jpg (600x319, 18K)

There's a lot of cheap 3rd world labor these days. You just aren't needed anymore. Your life basically has no meaning these days unless you start your own business.

Most people don't understand that large businesses are required to put ads for jobs. They almost always hire internally for important positions. The non essential jobs go to Stacys and niggers

You're resume is all wrong.
At the top with your education qualifications. You have no real experience, so you need to lead with that. Put the MS office stuff and ROTC stuff at the bottom under, you'll see when you keep reading my post. Education and GPA only.

below that, Employment experience. This is THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF YOUR RESUME. Most recent job at the top with dates you started and ended. Also list bullet points of responsibilities and highlights of that job. Post what you did, what responsibilities you had and what you learned. After most recent job, do the same thing with 2nd most recent job, and repeat.

After that, next section is certifications. If you have none, remove this section.

After that put skills and additional experience related to your skill set or job you're applying for but not something you gained through work experience. Put your MS office stuff and ROTC stuff here.

After that put awards given. If none, remove.

if you take nothing away from these instructions is this: You skills need to correspond directly with prior job history. You should frame everything related to that.

Trust me on this and follow this format. I have a very high paying IT job and your resume needs help. Not knock you, you're fresh out of school so you don't know any better. You have no where to go but up from here, buddy!

that resume doesnt look professional. hire someone to format it better. leave off associate degrees. only leave bachelors degree in X. move your work history to the top, and education below. qualifications should be moved to a cover letter

also most hires are by connections. its the refererals head if u suck. cold off the street could not do any work without remorse and hiring managers know this. cold market off the street from resumes is a last resort

its all about looks, sorry.
>noticed how all the successful, overpaid but still someone's employees look great?

>walk into place of business
>demand to speak to manager
>look HIM in the eyes
>give a strong, firm handshake
>instantly hired on the spot
>$200,000 signing bonus
>fires 24 npc's to make room for my hefty salary and brand new company Rolls Royce
>drive off into the sunset

Zoomers will never learn

Attached: 1536929058634.gif (467x398, 70K)

what jobs?

Attached: Capture.png (218x320, 73K)

This resume is terrible. Nobody cares about your objectives bro, you need keywords in that thing to make it past the ATS. Also, 20 applications is not that much. When I job hunt I usually do 5-7 a day.

Are you short?

bro, you cant just list your work experience, you have to explain why it is relevant to the job you are applying for. Like, the skills you developed from past work experience and why it is relevant for the requirements of your prospective job

Go hand it in personally majority of it is not being a eyesore

Beef up your work experience. I o format like this
>workplace (year) - (year)
>job title
>2-4 bullet points on relevant skills/tasks/duties with a little turd polishing/make it sound important/fluff

Education the same way
>Sacramento State University
>BS Business Management
>GPA/Clubs

>Sierra College (year) - (year)
>AS Business Management
>AS Business Administration
>GPA/Clubs

It's tricky but try to be succinct while making it sound like a big deal.

read what color is your parachute.

as others have already said your resume is all wrong. Hire some professional or do some research online of what are considered good resumes.

>assembly line worker
Can you read, you dumb cunt

Because you keep asking for salary as a first question

what if I have no job history? im 30 and have been depressed for years

but they can call and ask for details and then you are fucked

i have considered lying to get a minimum wagecuck job at computer shop but i don want to get caught and make things even worse

Can confirm. Never would have considered starting a business before if the job marker were half decent. It's an utter shit market.

Everyone is, we still go to work

The recession is here.

ok but what do i do now

You’re an over qualified nut job that nobody wants to deal with. Stop submitting resumes and just do applications. Lower your expectations faggot.

This is one of the worst resumes I have ever seen. Delete this shit entirely and start over.

Protip: Nobody reads resumes except AI and dumb HR thots. Of the two, the AI is the one that has the most impact on the hiring decision aside from the hiring manager (who won't read your resume anyways). With that in mind, you have to rewrite your resume for every position you apply to to match the keywords on the job description. Match it 1:1 since the AI doesn't know the difference between words. If a job description asks for "financial modeling" and you put financial analysis on your resume, you fucked up. Should have put "financial modeling."

Protip 2: fudge the numbers. If you're on Tinder and you're 5 11'', put down 6 0''. If you're asked for 3 years of managerial experience but you only have a year, put down 2 and a half. Everybody lies, it's expected

Protip 3) Most of the online job postings are either entry level sweatshops with shit pay/benefits, H1B fake postings, or internal promotions that are posted online to be made seem "legit". So don't put more effort than is required - shit asks for cover letter? Fuck that don't bother. Shit asks you why you want this job? Give them a sentence instead of a paragraph. Spend as little effort as possible on each application and send them out in bulk; you're trying to find a gold nugget by sifting through the shit and there's a whole lotta shit out there.

Maybe they are jelly of you so they don't want to hire you OP? You should put that you have a small penis to balance out your resume.

The truth of the matter is that more than half of all job postings are a formality. The company already knows exactly who they want to hire, or they have a fair idea of it.

>20

Honestly, kinda pathetic. You should put out at least 10 job applications a week. The way things work today is you apply to 100 job postings, you hear back from 10, five want to interview you and maybe two will make a job offer. Here, I'm gonna give you advice people normally pay to get told.

1: You need a social media account that actually flatters you. Purge your facebook. Your first hits on google shouldn't show you shit faced at some dumb college party getting drowned in pussy. It might bring you up the social totem pole in college but no employer is going to hire you for that and many will discount you over it. Employers don't want to hire some frat bro who's going to get the company sued. Start a Linkedin account, complete the profile, make sure you have a copy of your resume on it.

2: Your resume needs to not suck. this resume sucks. Dump the qualifications, no one cares. Do not list an objective, anyone reading your resume knows what your objective is. Anything further would go on a cover letter. A good cover letter can help you, but only if your resume does not suck. You're wasting a ton of white space on all sides- margins should be less than one inch. Ditch the black square, I don't know what that's for. Do not list a GPA if it's lower than a 3.5- most employers do not care anyways. Go online and find a good resume template and base your resume off that. This is just a mess.

3: You need to tailor your resume to the job posting. Match key words- if a job posting has very specific phrases it likes to use, your resume better have them too. Otherwise the filters will just shart yours out.

4: If you think you're half qualified for a job posting, apply. Anything lower than that is probably a waste of time.

> busines management
Bullshit degree with no academic substance. You're a dumbass with no tangible skills.

Die you cringey "depressed" fucks

I gotta say that sounds like bullshit.
I've never had so many options when looking up for available jobs.

just go

Attached: 1549818972211.gif (312x276, 121K)

This can’t be real...

like if you remember the comfy resume threads

Attached: 03skVJb5_400x400.jpg (400x400, 16K)

>be me
>come on here to try and find like minded business oriented individuals
>everyone is a wagecuck or salarycuck
>people talk about resumes which everybody knows are a waste of time

let me tell you something that i learned. Successful people don't use resumes and have no need for them, while not so successful people obsessed over every small detail

It's not lying, just spinning it from the angle of where you are applying too. If you left on good terms they'll back you up. There's an art to it but it's always been telling stories about past jobs that landed me a new one.

This is actually great advice.
I have no idea why people are so afraid of lying on resumes. Nobody is going to fucking double check anyway

>2002 to Present
>2016 to present

Why is the P lowercase now? Shows lack of attention to detail => carelessness at job

Use a better template and follow their formatting style(Education, skills, Work history, awards, ). Google drive has some free templates. It needs to be easy to skim for a recruiter. This looks like MS Word low effort.

wtf is this and what kind of job are you targeting with your mandarin growing and ms word skills?
kek

this

>17 years of experience in growing mandarin oranges
Thats a CEO material right there

Because you're not having sex

Attached: 1469971840050.jpg (1280x720, 113K)

Be assertive and call them. Ask if they received your application. This automatic shows your are not fully retarded/lazy/shy.

This guy knows how to play the game OP, listen to him.

>Ditch the black square
Shit advice desu

worst resume i have read in a while 2/10 would not give job

The supply of workers > Demand for workers, das judn and the boomers have purposefully imported millions of gibmedat collectors to every european and north american nation, dooming it in return for paying 10 dollars less while requiring a doctorate degree in aeronautics to work as a cleaner, the commies unironically understand the institutional need for worker-employer balance better than boomer capitalists

I uhhhhhhhhhh

Almost nobody gets their first job in a field by handing in resumes. You're supposed to know people who can get one for you. That's how all the normies do it.

just turn transgender for a day or until you're hired and you'll get it 100%

Please consider completely reformatting your resume. goto google and find le reddit resume resources for formatting and what to include. here's an example of a resume to show you a little better formatting and structure. the HR rep is only going to look at it for 1 minute so make sure you have everything you need to say up top. which in your case is your degree and job.

Attached: Please fix your resume.png (539x696, 98K)

Also make every bullet point a power statement. something you actually achieved. no one cares you pushed papers around or your "knowledge on how to track something". tell them about the best case you worked and it's outcomes, or how many cases you've worked and how many led to prosecutions/convictions etc.
>extensive claims investigation exp
wtf does that mean? how much is extensive? 5 cases? 500 cases? tell the HR rep.
>objective
drop the objective, your cover letter does this.

>my situation is good so everyone else must be retarded

> tfw when grow mandarin for 17 years🙁

if you tell a good story of how you did x project or had some impact on the company they aren't going to call and ask about it unless you said you made such outrageous claims like moving a proverbial mountain. dont lie just tell them what you actually did, add some whipped cream of being a little more important than you were, and put a cherry on top on how it's relatable to this job and shows you have experience doing something they want to see.

this but unironically, fuck as many coworkers as you can to show how good you are at collaborations

What to do about Linkedin and not having almost any work experience? I dont want people viewing my profile and seeing how big of a loser I am