New Faggot General!

Have new faggot questions? Ask them here and get people to make fun of you. Possibly even get advice.

I'll start:

>New faggot
>Using Coinbase pro
>Looking for exchanges where you can buy, and then trade quickly
>Tired of buying, and having a wallet hold for 7 days etc

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imgur.com/a/R2Pm5xE
youtube.com/watch?v=kTg3OdmtA9s
youtube.com/watch?v=VltHWZLH9cw
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

>use debit/credit card to buy ETH on coinbase
>send to Binance/IDEX wallet
>trade

Hello new faggot
Thank you for making a new faggot general thread for all your reddit buddies instead of shitting up the rest of biz. I sent you gold.

hmm. can i buy and then sell immediately on Binance???

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Can buy the real Bitcoin (Bitcoin Cash) with Credit Card at Bitcoin.com, then send the coins straight away to a crpyto only exchange with good service like binance.
Just have to wait for 6 confirmations usually, so this method might take about 2 hours total from decide to buy to trading.
Expensive though, 7% fee.
Better to find a local dealer you can trust, via local.bitcoin.com. Once you find a dealer you like, this could only take a few minutes if they are responsive.
It's peer to peer cash.

how exactly does everybody make fucking money through this? is it sieving through alt coins, or finding something in a slump and hanging onto that? what should i do?

Take down the picture. We're not posting pictures of kids with down syndrome. Have a little bit of compassion you son of a bitch. Wish I could knock some sense into you with my two fists.

>Wait until bitcoin is low. like 4K or lower
>Buy any established coin
>Wait 30 - 150 days
>get 2x - 5x

Party is over bud. There's no rush right now. Just buy solid projects like link. Fomo is for homos.

Thanks user

How to make money from fuck prostitute?

whatever you do. do not buy some flavor of the month brand new coin everyone is going on about. look at the bitcoin chart over it's lifetime. just wait for the dip, and buy one of the big established coins.

>BTC
>ETH
>LTC

that kind of thing.

yeah? so like i should only go for the big boys, not Quant or anything?

also is link actually worth it guys

link is probably a bad idea. it might become a proven coin, but now it is WAY too risky. also, BTC is too high right now to invest any serious cash into any crypto.

oof. thats sad. so i should hold off?

Here's a tip, don't take advice from random anons blindly. You can only trust your own judgement and research, only use anons for a general idea of what direction to researh.

Jow Forums has a lot of people that FUD link despite being all in because they don't want newfags to get in on the project before it takes off. If I were you I would DYOR and start right fucking now because the project is starting to take off. Don't FOMO but you better fucking get to it, at the very least get a suicide stack of 1K and DO NOT LISTEN TO Jow Forums ABOUT ANYTHING LINK RELATED

imgur.com/a/R2Pm5xE

thank you user, that's solid advice. i will investigate it myself and see if i should invest

Why not like that retards gonna be able to get on Jow Forums let alone turn on a PC

No problem, just for some context not but a week ago everybody was claiming LINK would go straight to 50 cents, check the charts right now on daily and weekly candles and compare it to other coins.

Also read the whitepaper for any coin you're interested in first, judge it for potential issues. As a rule of thumb PND shitcoins don't last for more than a month or two here on Jow Forums and they'll be really obvious

What does seething mean?

Angry, upset, butt blasted, pooper peeved, anally annihilated, rump rekt, etc.

Comprehensive newfag guide:
>whales are accumulating
no such thing, if it were true whales would compete with each other, if someone says this while price is dropping he is probably dumping on you
>bots are trading it down
literally just sell, because "bots" will keep trading it down until its 0
>price drop is bullish
>correction is a good thing
If price drops then nobody wants to buy at current price which means market is bearish and you should sell
>i am a whale and x will do y
How stupid are you to believe this?
>soon
never
>its a longterm hold
Translation: Imao dude of course price won't go up in the next 5 months or even a year what were you thinking
>bought more
Ask him for wallet public key and watch him go insane.

>telling newfag to read charts.
Might as well be telling a nigger to not spread AIDS.
Bullshitting aside, if you can afford it, get a suicide bag of link ASAP. Then do your homework as to whether or not you want more, or what coins to buy. Tbh, top 10 projects are rather safe. If a guy just bought a monthly bag as part of his savings every month, regardless of what the market is doing, he’d have good returns the next time btc takes off.

This is just the thread I needed.

I am such a fucking retard at this shit. I know I need to be investing to make my stagnant assets grow but I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I have read all about it but this shit seems to go right over my head.

I understand most of the basic terminology and how the market works but I don't understand how the average person could possibly make a profit off of this. I don't have the time, energy or know how to day trade. I work 60 hours a week, it's just not viable but it seems like I never make money on whatever I invest in. I have tried Robinhood. I wasn't seeing any substantial growth so I moved it over to Betterment and I actually started losing money.

I'm so fucking lost. I don't know what I'm doing wrong and I feel like I'm completely blind.

It isn't like I'm telling him to do TA I told him to zoom out and compare LINK to every other shitcoin PND Jow Forums shills. That alone should tip off anyone that there's more to it than what's shitposted here.

>suicide stack

By that do you mean an investment that you are willing to lose heavy on but it could go either way?

A "suicide stack" is a set amount that you're willing to lose and forget about on a project that is very likely to be successful often long term. The 1,000 EOY memes are entirely possible if you understand the actual mechanics behind what gives the tokens themselves value, it took me weeks of reading to understand the implications. $10 for this project in the long term would be considered a failure.

That's why you get a "suicide stack" in the event something nobody can see coming happens.

How do I buy Chainlink?

I forgot, the generally accepted suicide stack for Link has always been 1K. You hear this with other coins but especially Link because of the potential long term.

It's so you don't kill yourself if Link actually reaches $1K by 2025 and you just assumed it was a meme.

>potential long term
classic example of a clueless shill

Thank you for the demonstration user. This my newfriends is the type of FUD you can expect. One of 3 things are true here:

1) This is an oldag who has tens of thousands of LINK and is shitposting for fun

2) A genuine retard that fell for the FUD and is convinced that LINK is an illegitimate project because all the oldfags told him it was a scam (despite everyone on Jow Forums owning a stack of Link that's been here for over a few months)

3) Some random tourist that just assumes everything is a scam regardless of what you tell him. Typically a boomer who's sole investments are in a 401K and shiny rocks

What the fuck happened to you biz? This thread should be filled with OP is a faggot and bad advice

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And holy fuck look at this delusion. LINK is a fucking meme that buy shills to newfags so they go broke. Everyone knows the only way to make it is to all in BSV.

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Fuck you're right I completely forgot about BSV. thanks just sold all my linkies what was I thinking

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>long term investement in funny tokens created by balding fat philosophy major claiming its the next financial revolution while its price is only driven by newfags on Jow Forums who fall for link meme
yep, thats going into my bagholder compilation

Woahhh, wait a minute there nolinker, you're telling me that

>despite hating LINK you monitor the price religiously and make a thread as soon as there is any movement
>develop novel and intiutive FUD plotlines using the most up to date information you constantly seek out
>dedicate your creative energies to editing maymays with LINK branding
>have LINKtrader, GitHub, Gitter, pivotaltracker bookmarked so you can keep up to date with the project you hate
>actively participate in a LINK discord or telegram group
>know more about LINK than any other project, even more than stinkylinkies themselves

You need to have sex incel

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youtube.com/watch?v=kTg3OdmtA9s
i don't give a fuck about your shitcoin lmao

1K EOY is FUD it's already been confirmed

youtube.com/watch?v=VltHWZLH9cw

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wanna fuck btw? I'm subby bottom

imagine buying a scam shilled by nazis on a incel meet and greet board.

sry bb but im for sergey only and im going to bed now

GL newfags you're gonna need it

dump that fat fuck, I'm fit and cute
besides, we can cuddle while we lose all your money together