Sell me this pen

sell me this pen

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do you have a pen? if you got one i'll give you prostate massage with it, OP

Now this is a very nice pen!
Look at the way it shines.
You want a shiny shiny pen?
This is the one for you good sir!

This pen belonged to my mother. Checked and sell penpilled

God man I wish you came to me a couple hours ago, but this pen is already sold. I'm just waiting for the buyer to come and pick it up. You know this is actually the pen Donald Trump used to sign the new tax law?

I have your wife and daughter. I will exchange them for one thing and one thing only. This pen.

Hello my name is Israel Horowitz, would you like to buy my pen?

/business

This pen bla bla bla use it to sign the most important deal of your life bla bla bla

When do I get my money?

What if I told you you I know of a sure fire way to get free meme tokens, would you be interested? Well, if you're like me, I'm sure you have a pooper. You have a pooper, don't you? Well all you have to do is buy this pen from me and insert it into your honey hole and you'll be collecting sweet syrup from you're money tree in no time!

please sir do the needful i am humble pen saleman i need to sell for food for family please sirs i am in the needing of money i am having pay rent on 3rd please its good pen very high quality you will not regret if you buy sirs

Spot on Pajeet! You're hired!

This pen is not just any pen, this pen has been inside the thiccest brapper known to man. Give it a sniff.

You already bought that pen. You just took it out of your jacket. I’ve never seen that pen before in my life

Wolf of wall street sucked. Totally unrealistic and fake and gay

Belle Daphene once was in the same room as this pen.
$500 paypig.

I bathed in it.

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You guys are terrible at this. How about, she stuck it up her ass? That would sell.

>he doesnt listen to the speech every morning to get motivated

You've gotta admit that this bitch knows how to sell fucking widgets.

This pen was once in Belle Delphine
$1000 Paypig.

Every single person who owns this pen will avoid the big gay for the rest of their lives.

You need a reliable pen, and a ergonomic pen that feels good in your hand. This pen writes clearly and never smidges and you’ll have perfect signatures and smudge free writing. It won’t ever bleed through your document so you will always have crisp clean professional signatures and contracts. This pen will never bleed or leave ink on your hands that could, god forbid, transfer to your clean pressed shirts.
And when signing with clients the chrome and gold shows your high status and professionalism. Subtle, unassuming, but pure class. They will know from this pen you must also have good taste in spirits. They think, I like this guy.

That pen would sell for 20k and you know it.

You have the pen on hand. You know how it feels. You can tell it's high quality. Just buy it while you have it. It's just that convenient.

Nah you can't afford this pen, why waste my time?

;) good post

"buy this pen or i will ram it up your asshole and post pics of it on Jow Forums"

So does this bitch sell useless shit for giggles to ironic weebs or something?

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This sounds like a clever way to get around prostitution laws.

Belle Delphine used it as a masturbation tool.

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Hey take down this account number. What's that? You don't have a pen? Oh you have a pen, but its a shitty bic that is out of ink? It figures, only faggot like you would be unprepared to take down an account or phone number on a second's notice. No wonder you're fucking poor. I'm gonna take my pen, write this number down, and I'M going to call and make this fucking deal. You're gonna home to your cunt wife and bitch about how you didn't get a raise, and then you are gonna ask for a pen for christmas, but she doesn't know shit either so she's gonna buy you another shitty bic to replace that fucking waste of space you carry around now. The only think you are gonna write with that fucking pen is a suicide note for when you realize how fucked up every decision you ever made was. Unless you buy this pen now, $39.99 for the "Executive" model, you could spend 20 on the lower end, but you don't want people thinking your a cheap faggot, do you?

she would never say that it like that, you gross assburger

>THIS
pen...
your grandfather hid it in his
>ASS
and then after the niggars got his ass
>I
hid
>THIS PEN
in
>MY
ass...
Then came Joe Pesci and
>you DID watch
Casino
>didn't you?

We're entertaining serious offers only, I couldn't let a person like you walk out of here with that pen.

"Name's Bond. James, Bond."
>pen flies about like a rocket drone and rests right back between fingers.
"All I asked them for was a pen."

You can shove it up many pajeet poopers

hey that's my signature

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what if I told you this pen has ties to the global journalist cartel, will usher the fourth writing revolution in the same way as printing books did and was discovered by a bunch of racist neets?

t. 10k penholder

you can use it to shove it up your butt for free LINKs.