Wife has been cheating on me for five months. I found out and collected text evidence, eyewitness testimony, etc. I found texts with her and the guy saying she's going to get me and my kids arrested on abuse charges by faking the fact that we hit her. With or without that, she's going to divorce and take half of my shit (that's 800,000 USD for her, at least). I live in california so it is a no-fault divorce state. What do I do? Can I give the house to my son (20 years old) to protect it? Any good ways to launder it? Any good ways to hide it?
Thanks. I posted this in Jow Forums but someone told me to post it here. bitcoin? How would that work?
Fake a gambling addiction and buy tons of btc otc instead. She thinks all the money is lost at the casino and you saved it in secret btc accounts.
Lincoln Jones
yeah just fucking lie.
Gabriel Brooks
"Fake a gambling addiction and then gamble all your money away. It's the perfect plan!"
Asher Nelson
Its not about the wife though. It's about the court. Would that hold up? Also, how about the house? The house is worth 1.2 million dollars. I can't sell that without her signature as well. However, I CAN refinance it without her permission. What now?
Camden Jackson
Tell your kids what's going on and lawyer the fuck up
Landon Richardson
This, lmao
Justin Nguyen
Go to the police in advance and set her up idiot. Let her fake the charges then divorce her with a well-paid lawyer and take the house and all her wealth and send her to jail idiot.
Give me your email. You can pay me in BTC.
Luis Bell
They know. I have a lawyer. But the lawyer is only giving LEGAL advice which will give her 50% of her money anyways
Liam Miller
Go fucking HAM and refinance to buy btc then wash with monero and repeat. Worst case scenario you lose the keys. This is 100% satire and not financial advise I am totally memeing rn.
Collect all the concrete evidence and the fake abuse. Fake a trip somewhere and inform the police. Get a sting setup. You should already be balls deep with a lawyer.
Evidence. Evidence. Evidence.
Then go to the guy she wants to leave you for. Tell him it's over and tell he's facing prison time with the cops beside you. Get him to setup the sting and make the call for abuse. Better yet if she tries to hire a hitman.
You found a classic black widow my man. Get her to commit a crime and send her ass to prison. Then take everything. A good lawyer is 20k not including court fees. Good luck.
Blake Jackson
DO NOT. DO NOT.
Launder the money.
Now is the time to get a sting going. You need the police on your side and you need recordings, photos, screenshots and written and court admissible evidence.
Nathan White
You made your bed, now sleep in it
Jeremiah Baker
Sell everything, I mean everything and put into crypto and fake gambling addiction. There's a cute little trick I told a divorce friend about that actually worked for him: sell your house and rent it from the person you sold to. So virtually nothing changes from your wife's pov. You don't tell her obviously. Again fake gambling addiction and put all crypto (tether will work). If you really wanna giver her the least possible, find a way to get fired if you have a job. Then file for divorce. At worst you'll own her her half of everything, which you will "have no way of paying." Her lawyer will want to cut a deal, which you will take as low as your lawyer can get.
Matthew Carter
do you have a job? alimony payments will come in regardless if u transfer home to kid. dont get married play shitty games win shitty prizes
Thomas Murphy
You need to avoid her for a bit and you need to talk to a seargent. Call the non-emergency dispatch and get a seargent on the line. Ask for one and tell him to come meet you. Get him to record all the evidence.
You need to trap her faking the abuse. That's a felony. Also. You can get her for adultry. Adultry combined with the faking abuse felony will net you all the proceedings.
Liam Richardson
Actually do this. It's more possible than my hypothetical bullshit. I have known someone personally that pulled it off.
But it still doesn't matter though. California is no-fault divorce. She will ALWAYS get 50/50. I need her signature to sell the house. This wouldn't work
David Nelson
Don't listen to these idiots. You've done nothing wrong.
You need to avoid laundering money and assets so you can legally claim them.
If she is breaking the law you can get her strung up by the neck.
Get the man she is fucking to convince her to hire a hitman. That hitman will approach but he's a cop. Boom. Evidence recorded.
Prison for life. Years later hire a hitman for the guy if you want.
Josiah Thomas
Then refinance, which will be even better. Plan doesn't change.
Ethan Ortiz
NO SHE WON'T DIPSHIT.
NOT IF SHE BREAKS THE LAW TRYING TO FRAME YOUR ASS. THAT'S ILLEGAL AND RENDERS THE DIVORCE UNTENABLE.
YOU KEEP ALL YOUR SHIT. SHE GOES TO PRISON. YOU'RE BEING A FUCKING IDIOT.
Jack Cook
If you actuallt abused her, the truth will come out and you're fucked. Then you have to launder your assets and leave the country.
You need to initiate the divorce on your terms with EVIDENCE.
Jaxon Young
>gambling addiction and put all crypt I see, good idea. I'll look into it. How would I convince him to do that, lmao.
Also everyone else: Thanks for the advice, but the abuse thing is a small part of it. That's an IF. She threatened to. Right now she's monitoring my cell phones, email addresses, etc. She doesn't know that I know she's cheating. She still threatened to arrest us just because she "hates us and wants to kill us". It's about the money right now. None of this evidence will do anything because California is no fault-divorce. I have no choice but to launder
She threatened to. But she hasn't yet. I'll work on trying to get her to do it though. Never touched her. But she's hit me, our kids (including marks on 11 year old daughter. I have pictures and recordings)
Leo Hernandez
I hate stupid niggers like you that come here for larp threads.
You get her cheating.
That's a fault divorce. Game over you won.
Then even if she threatened abuse, that's still a crime. That's conspiracy with the guy.
Talk to him. If he wants to avoid cuffs, he needs to cooperate with you and law enforcement.
Even though I'm not married I've been thinking about how to handle this situation for about three days now. I have a high IQ so I will come up with an answer eventually. Drop a temp email or something if you want me to contact you when I discover the answer.
Shouldn't you be talking to a lawyer instead of Jow Forums?
Nathan Torres
You can get that thrown out.
The law is on her side up until a point. She can't no-fault divorce you if you sue her and she has a pending trial for a crime.
William Rodriguez
why did you marry such a shitty women.
dont you know only 10% of women are marriage materiel
Owen Russell
See here. Also, she threatened to. I can't get in her trouble for a felony without proof and until she does. Either way, I don't think she will. Again, that's a small part. I need to hide my money even if she doesn't do that, because she will still divorce.
sell it all and put it into BTC. they won't be able to take it.
>wife won't sign
doesn't matter, fake the signature and leave the country. also get incriminating evidence against her.
Jack Parker
Won't I be held liable for that money anyways? I'll owe it to them
Andrew Gonzalez
Divorce her then file a domestic tort lawsuit.
Colton Howard
If this isnt a larp you ahve too uch to lose by taking shit advice of this board on your situation. Go see a good divorce lawyer on the quiet and get your ducks in a row before you are forced to react to a bad situation. You get the advice you pay for.
Ayden Cox
Local.bitcoin.com poof it's gone.
Yet still easy for you to use and spend when you need.
I still can’t believe anyone ever gets married anymore
Ryan Martin
Don't launder anything. Trick her into moving to another state where her actions will fuck her. Bribe her with something. She sounds stupid enough to go for it.
Ryder Green
When did she first start acting violent? After the marriage?
Jaxson Thompson
>What do I do? you gotta kill the bitch because are right your kids are already a lost cause. thanks for making more fucked up people
Sell all assets, buy BTC on an exchange, then setup proxy/TOR PROPERLY and drain your exchange wallets to a hardware wallet. Say you got hacked, then you get to file capital losses as well. Slowly launder the BTC for cash.
John Harris
Bitcoin. And secure seed phrase by remembering it
Isaiah Brown
Would suggest that you fake a gambling addiction as one user said and buy an unknown amount of Monero
Robert Wilson
>give your house/car/everything you have to your son >put all your money into crypto (preferably BTC or LINK for possible gains) >say you lost everything on crypto >say you lost and don't remember the seeds/password for your cryptowallet >say whatever the fuck you want about getting absolutely JUSTed by crypto, no one understands this shit anyway >win
Daniel Ortiz
Threaten to blackmail for something and since you have all the money say that you will continue to drown her in legal fees until she is broke, also move out of the country
Evan Harris
Sooo much this... my buddies wife was a heroin junkie would bring guys into their home. And fuck em for money and he still had to pay half
Ryan Mitchell
Unironically hire someone to kill them
Angel Morgan
Forget about the money user, she will get her “fair share” no matter what. Focus an what’s important, recovering emotionally from what this cunt has done to you and move on with your life.
If you get caught doing ANYTHING to hide money you’ll be absolutely rekt even more. Understand that she fucked you hard and do your best to limit how much more she can take from you.
The absolute BEST thing you can do at this point is not show her a single ounce a resentment. Kill her with kindness, show her that you are happier with out her. She will eventually destroy herself, don’t let her take you down with her.
Highly probable that she will come crawling back to you begging for her “family” back. Do not give in, cut her off emotionally, physically and only give her what the courts demand from you. She’ll slowly fade away from your lives naturally. Women like this are their own worst enemy.
Asher Perez
So no one here answered a good one. This is my advice for you! Sell everything, literaly everything!! It's going to be alot of money. then try to buy more crypto as possible in a short period of time, and then you have to hide the cryot as well like mixing. After that? You must move out of USA! or if you want you can keep living in USA but must hide yourself very well. I'd recommend you to move to somewhere like south america or asia or any shit like that. After this? Enjoy. Fuck your wife, fuck your kids, she wanted that right? The kids will be fine, she will take care of em..
Jordan Rodriguez
Wow I come here for coin recommendations but instead I get relevant advice from older sages.
Should I buy UND? I'm literally shaking at this arb chance right now.
Brayden Mitchell
Refinance your house, sell as much as you can without raising suspicion. Send rhe money to a local exchange and buy bitcoin with it. Once you have it, you can send it anywhere and hide it. Pretty easy user.
Godspeed and fuck that skank
Zachary Hall
Thanks for the help everyone. I talked to a lawyer and he said I’m basically fucked. How horrible is the fucking law???????
Samuel Miller
buy gold & silver en mass and bury the shit somewhere before shtf, it's what my uncle did and it worked out for him. Or collectibles like old mtg cards. As long as it's unregistered assets. t, a faguette, the most fucked up country in the world in term of pro feminazi divorce clownlaws, where you can be sentenced up to 5 years of jail if you do a dna test to determine if your son is yours, where wives win 96.5% of divorces and where 94% of judges in family courts are women
You're not fucked, just start learning about Bitcoin right now. Once you have your money in your Bitcoin private key no one can take it from you. No one.
Je n’ai pas l’abilité de vendre ma Maison sans la permission de ma femme
Kevin Wood
How do I get the money out of my house dude. And the government can still tell me I owe her the money over a long term and I have to work to pay it back
Gavin Nelson
Forget the house, i speak about what can be saved, empty your accounts, sell the furnitures, your car, hide the family photos, all the shit she could reclaim. Sell even the damn cat and the shovel in your cuckshed. It's a fucking war to death man, stop to be in the cucked boomer mindset. If you don't go full SS oberkampfuhrer Rambo NOW you alrdy lost the match. Wake the fuck up, it's serious shit, she could destroy your life.
You already said, Refinancing, put it in Bitcoin. "Lose" your private keys in a boating accident whoops. Or "gambling" whatever you think will be most convincing. They don't fully believe you, but so what? It's good enough to keep you out of prison. And they are going to take your wages so what? Not if you get paid in Bitcoin. There ARE companies that do it. Cash out your bitcoins as you need them in person for cold hard cash. Local.bitcoin.com. If it stays out of the banking system the judge can't seize your pay and give it to your ex wife. Bitcoin is a superpower. It means no one can steal YOUR money. USE IT.
Do not send any amount of money to anyone, or put your money in exchanges of deacons. 35% of the people here are from India
Juan Hughes
This, OP. But you will have to buy from places that don't do KYC/AML, because if there are records showing you bought crypto (e.g., Coinbase) then you will get raped by the judge for trying to conceal assets.
Be sure to blame your gambling problem on depression stemming from your wife's infidelity.
> I found texts with her and the guy saying she's going to get me and my kids arrested on abuse charges by faking the fact that we hit her. SAVE COPIES OF THESE. Proof of this sort of fraud may not get your wife thrown in jail because pussypass, but it can prevent you from being thrown in prison.
Also, get a DNA test on your kids to make sure they're really yours. California's laws on paternity are bad so you're probably fucked anyway, but there's a very tiny chance that you might be able to escape by showing paternity fraud if your kids aren't too old yet.
Talk to a lawyer ASAP. Start planning and making arrangements. Also, if you have any personal property that you're especially attached to, move it out of the house to someplace secure that only you know about -- maybe leave it with your parents if they're still around, or whatever.
Dominic Harris
buy ricin from the deep web or make it yourself and poison her, though don't buy anything you might need from local drug stores if you decide to make it yourself. you have no other choice for you or your kids lock the evidence somewhere where it won't ever be found (but don't destroy it), and don't tell your kids she cheated, you need to act like you didn't know at all, the guy will confront you after her death and it will all probably come to light.
Elijah Brooks
Holy shit user, what nightmare country do you hail from? Sweden?
Benjamin Baker
Buy crypto. Somebody "hack you" you stay with nothing and wife will leave you.
Ethan Evans
or ask her to come with you somewhere and crash the car on her side to a corner, be sure to disable any airbags on her side if you can, if you time it right there is no way she'll make it, do it in an empty road that way no one gets hurt and no witnesses will know the way you crashed the car, better? cut something in the car and since you have evidence of her talking about killing you, blame it on her if anyone finds out the brakes were sabotaged.
Carson Miller
also for any cuck thinking this is extreme, it's not, the roastie wants to destroy her husband and her kids for chad's cock, the system is broken and encourages this behavior by taking her side, the white man needs to take matters in his own hands and act quickly, intelligently and with honor. also dna test your kids, those that are yours stay in the house and those who aren't get in the crash mobile.
Alexander Martin
sounds like france because of the dna test prohibition
Make her have a little accident walking down the stairs lmao
Nathaniel Garcia
You're the stupid nigger. California doesn't allow adultery as a cause of action in a divorce. As far as the state is concerned, a wife can whore herself out, go to sex clubs, get AIDS, and there's still no "fault" to divorce her under.
FFS, California decriminalized INTENTIONAL spreading of HIV. You can literally take a needle full of HIV-infected blood, jam it into someone, and can only get charged with a misdemeanor now, because a homosexual state legislator felt it was bigoted to criminalize spreading a fatal disease.
Cooper Ward
>get your ducks in a row
Why didn't you say "lawyer up" too you reddit faggot
Gabriel Perez
It's not that hard, really. You just have to plan VERY long-term.
Texas doesn't allow spousal maintenance for more than two years, and paternity fraud means zero child support as long as you sue within two years of reasonably suspecting that the child isn't yours (IOW, you can't get out of it if your wife births a niglet and you wait five years because you love the baby, but if the kid might be yours and you don't bother to test, you can still divorce and not pay support if you failed to find out until the divorce).
Prenups have to be drafted very carefully. Some states and some judges will do absolutely everything that they can to shred the prenup. California is one of those.
You kids nowadays are lucky that crypto exists. You don't have to buy gold coins and bury them innawoods any more. You can just go to a BTM that doesn't do KYC/AML like one of the original Lamassus, pay the "outrageous" premium, and flash a QR code to the camera. No one will ever know who it belongs to unless you talk about it.
If you can't find a BTM that doesn't have KYC/AML on it, get a friend to create the account. If you want to prevent him from risking getting fucked on taxes, have him write a bill of sale to you for the amount you had to pay, dated the same day of purchase. Then if he ever gets audited (unlikely), he can show he got rid of it immediately for no gain, and therefore it's not taxable and he didn't have to report it unless he wanted to be safe.
Better yet, find some dying old man in a nursing home to do the ID validation. Then once he's gone no one will ever know.
Divorce is civil court not criminal court, contracts don't matter they just show consent, which can be lied about as coercion.
Owen Butler
There's gotta be a way to legally verify during the signing of the prenup that is was not under coercion. i.e. a third party
Grayson Jackson
this is what they mean when they say 'store of value'. Its secret asset protection against divorce rape
Juan Flores
You are probably the only man to ever try and hide his assets from an impending divorce so the court and her lawyer will be totally taken by surprise and not have any way to remedy the situation. Count on it.
Jonathan Perry
You can, yes. You each have a separate attorney represent you. However it is still a civil agreement not a legal one and can be dismissed.
Grayson Garcia
Buy shit ton of gold in cash and say you gambled it via sports betting.
put all of your money in LINK, and give her half of your stack of stinkie linkies, that shit will be worth $0 soon enough.
Thomas Garcia
>no fault divorce holy shit burger user, there would be not a single day without me thinking about killing her and that dude OJ style before even thinking about giving her half of my shit.
>hide all your money in a public ledger so that they can objectively see that you didn't, in fact, lose any money at all the absolute state of Jow Forums if you don't have 100 monero by 2020 you will not make it >pic related
>"What website, user?" >"Okay, we will reach out to them and confirm this." mongoloid.
Sebastian Morgan
it doesn't matter anyways because you will not be able to convince any female you're actually interested in to sign a prenup. I don't know why guys think it's as easy as saying "Hey honey, sign this please!" no, it's a process, it will take weeks, and your potential wife will absolutely think you're using her or don't trust her etc etc etc. good. fucking. luck. just buy monero and forget about it. honestly. fuck you retards for making me wait so long. I know for a fact it's a 5-figure asset. but this thread is proof enough that this RETARDED MARKET thinks a public ledger is "PrIvAtE eNoUgH" - meanwhile, law enforcement pumps literal millions into chain analysis, and arrests are coming as a direct result. screencap me. I want to laugh in the future.
Leo Carter
>gambling addiction and put all crypt >I see, good idea. I'll look into it. If you go for this, don't neglect actually going to a casino regularly, so that there are evidence of you going there. I don't know if this is has any value or not, but in my legalities-related clueless mind, it does.
It seems more believable if there is actual camera footage of you entering the casino and gambling than just saying "Woops! I lost them all!"
Easton Wood
Go to a notary and/or lawyer and deliver all the evidence in a sealed and dated envelope. The second she files charges, reveal said evidence and watch her burn in court.
