What are the most painless suicide methods?

Try alan watts like that other user said, and meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

I've wanted to kill myself for a long time but user if you have people that depend on you (including emotionally - like your family) it will affect them too. Suicide is contagious, unfortunately. You must push through.

i've tried that, helium tanks contain oxygen now. someone walked in the fucking room when i had a bag over my head, dammit. explaining that away as an accident wasn't easy.

sleeping in the snow is a good one, but you get called a pussy when u die and maybe laughed at too. You dont want that do you?

It's unironically nembutal.

Retard. Dying from hypothermia takes a long time

You need to get saved, friend
m.youtube.com/watch?v=WDEBz25lGdY

he said painless

idk, ask the guys from M*A*S*H

lol

lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods has a chart

My dad works at a hospital and one of his doctor friends who deals with drug overdoses has told him every dead person he has seen who died of a heroine OD has always had a big smile on their face.

If you seriously want to go out, i’d just OF on that at least your last moments should be happy. But no seriously don’t kill self bro.

i've OD'd on heroin. i took too much and stopped breathing. thing is, it's impossible to be scared of ANYTHING while on heroin. i was so relaxed that i remember thinking to myself 'huh, i'm not breathing. that can't be good... but... why bother breathing, to live? what's the point in that? nah i'm too cosy, cbf to breathe'
it's inevitably less suffering than a shotgun to the face, i mean that's just instant nothingness, same as explosives, but they're a bitch to get. my plan is to just slam a gram of opiates in a vein. 5 cosy minutes later i'll be braindead.

Why do you want to go out without suffering? If I am going to kill myself you bet your ass I'm going out in style. Sand niggers might be stupid, lazy, over zealous nutcases but damn do they know how to kill themselves.

Face it, you're looking for painless because you don't actually want it. Otherwise it wouldn't matter, even the most painful methods you'll feel pain for what, a few minutes at worst?

How did you not die from OD'ing?

>I like pain and suffering guys
>its totally normal for everyone

guess i started breathing again in time. the whole thing was cosy as hell. i had weird audio hallucinations, i could hear cockerels crowing all damn night, but if i concentrated on it it went away.
i've OD'd maybe 100 times on allsorts of drugs. more than once in a day sometimes. still alive.
ODing on opiates is the only correct answer after explosives/guns. it's how harold shipman killed his patients, it's what you'll be put on if you're fatally ill, and it's how doctors commit suicide.

they shoved a tube up his ass and suck it out

why the hell would i want to feel minutes of extreme pain if i could feel none? dumb. you'd scream like everyone else if you were fatally injured. dying is extreme suffering almost always. fuck that, it can be avoided.

How the fuck do you know you OD'd if you didn't wind up at a hospital? Sounds like you just took a lot of heroin, not an OD. But I don't know shit

seriously nothing beats dying from an old age. At that point u could careless it also be less painful just to die

Who said you had to like it? I'm saying it's pointless to go out and kill yourself painlessly because that pain will only exist for a few seconds at best. Assuming what you think would be painful actually will be considering your body pumps you full of adrenaline when such events happen. I hear your body releases all sorts of chemicals upon death, it's probably even a pleasurable experience

Embrace the pain, it's the last thing you'll ever feel or comprehend after all.

GODpilled

i've still got the hospital discharge form from a couple of months earlier stating that historically i've OD'd on diazepam, mdma and codeine. nah man i've OD'd shitloads of times. isn't necessarily fatal, i've just been ludicrously lucky. i spent decades munching valium like smarties while getting shitfaced drunk every night too. one night of that i'm told, would kill many. apparently i just keep chugging along.
talking of chugging, it's 5.30am and i just cracked a cider. i'm never sober.

Interesting. What's your life like?

Buy link fren

Why don't you take a few of (((them))) out before killing yourself and make the world a better place in ways the living cannot? It sounds to me like you attempt suicide as a method of attention whoring.

Blow your brains out, it's as simple as that.

a picture is worth 1000 words

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I was in a real bad spot and e-mailed the guy from Mexico who supplies Nembutal. Getting a response from him talking about pricing and shipping options was a surreal experience. Couldn’t go through with it

>attention whoring
none of those were intentional OD's, i've never attempted suicide nor do i imagine i will.

Fukken Bells yes lad, do you go out getting fucked with others anymore?

Oh I confused you for OP, I have had too much whisky tonight carry on

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not so much now nah. booze in bars is too pricey, i just get fucked up alone and shitpost online. pretty sure that's the norm nowadays

you ever miss being normal?

not really. i mean i guess i could be normal again if i quit everything and sobered up. i know though that it's being fucked up that i'd miss. being a poly drug addicted alcoholic hurts like a motherfucker most of the time, but when it is fun, it's the most damn fun it's possible to have. absolute shotgun of feelgood chems to the brain multiple times a day. it's an absolute riot, and worth the price of an inevitably early death.

No, it doesn't. There is nothing about that in the Bible as far as I know.

Living until old age.

get drunk and jump off a bridge

how is daoism helpful in trading?

the rather more pressing issue is that he might soon blow his head off. i imagine he'll worry more about candles once his life is no longer in danger.

Fuck this god anyways. He should be the one roasting in hell.

god forgives everybody. would He not be forgiving to one who feels as though they have no choice but to end it? one who was at the absolute rock bottom in their life and made a "wrong" decision?

This

only 0.01% of the population has real justifiable reason to kill themselves, after undergoing through debilitating childhood. (I mean sexual abuse and that sort of hard stuff) others are just people who didn't take responsibility for their actions so they are at pitfall. you can always change your life by making better decisions. even at the age of 40.

Fent.
Way too easy to even on the dark web still. Get it before it's classified as a chemical wmd

The only thing the guy who OD'd on heroin is right about is the audio hallucinations. it's bain damage. Had the same thing happen. Sounds like the volume gets turned way down for hours. Happened multiple times too.

You will probably wake up in an alternate reality each time you try though. You're here to stay, just like the rest of us. Go travel or get addicted to something fun faggot

>The only thing the guy who OD'd on heroin is right about
wut

I was just thinking about this when driving home today. If I don't make it with crypto in the next few years, there's not much reason to hang around.

imagine running away from your problems all your life to the point it makes your life worse to the point where you even wanna run away from the problem of pain to finish yourself while you are down.

good job. you caused all of this because you can't stand up and face your issues head on.

Most hilarious thing too is that since you have nothing to lose maybe its worth it to face your issues head on. Why the fuck do you care about the consequences? you have nothing to lose.

nah just be selfish and uptight. everything wrong with people that you hate, staring back in the mirror.

This.

I own both a shotgun and opiates.
Just in case.

Have sex

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I sometimes feel bad the west has lost its religion, then I get reminded why I hate it when people post things like this. There is nothing after death, it's like what it was before being born, just nothingness and peace. People like you guys, who get a kick out of scaring people looking for a way out, are the ones who will "go to hell".

sauce

This. But luckily for you, you can pay me money and you won't go to hell

t. Catholic church

just shoot yourself in the head
ideally do it inside a room and leave a note on the door which tells what you did to lessen the shock of whoever finds you

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Turkroach who deleted her instagram

>inevitably less suffering than a
*more than a

god what a cheerful thread.

Jumping from a skyscraper probably doesn't hurt for more than a fraction of a second.

i'd rather be cosy af on smack than screaming and shitting myself hurtling towards the concrete.
a lot of people don't jump from high enough either. you need to fucking vaporise on impact, or you may be laying there with every bone in shards, waiting waiting praying screaming waiting and waiting... to die.

unironically read Seneca, kek

skyscrapers all have suicide fences these days. And if you jump from anything shorter there's a good chance you'll survive. Also one time a guy fell on a pole and was impaled, didn't die for hours. There's a video of it out there