WankBells

I met a kid once who was the son of my dads college friend. The faggot had a door knocker that the parents would use to summon him from his semen encrusted den. They were a 'sexually free' family, their daughter was a degenerate, their son was a retard. When we first got there they wanted him to come out and say "hi", they knocked the door with the thing. 45 minutes later he comes out, by then they had told us that they never open his door because of his 'privacy'. Also the kid made a pact with his friends to never do drugs, yet sat in his room and jerked off all day. We went to play video games and he told me if her jerked off 5 times a day that was a slow day.

Support MGTOW. Go see Ready Player One in theaters today!!

Stop masturbating so much

Mainly stop watching porn

>Postie rings doorbell
>immediately pop boner

Well I tell my mom i'm gonna wank and she doesn't disturb me cause she knows I gonna have to keep replenishing that fluid and spread the family genes someday

>Pavlovs wanker

just have your porn on mute,ive never watched porn with audio

EVER

when i was a kid and you had to fap alot while parents was in the house you develop ultra instinct so you dont get caught lol

>install this on 8 yo bedroom
>boy is now 19
>creams his panda every time he hears a doorbell

> How would you feel Jow Forums
Go back to plebbit faggot

I posted it on Jow Forums first you little knob

remember to sage non political threads
and why do you think this belongs on Jow Forums? post it on Jow Forums or /b/

Because Jow Forums are obsessed with the morality of fapping

>not jamming something under/infront of the door to buy yourself time

Not when you're mother assumes you're doing drugs or something else she doesn't like.

i dont live with my parents

Oh shit, that's something you have to consider.
Pavlov's boner is real, user. I used to take diphenhydramine as a sleeping aid. I'd take a couple gel caps, fap as I waited for the effects to kick in, and go to sleep. Did that for a few months, and then one day allergy season starts and pollen is everywhere and I take a Benadryl for it, before work.

BAM! Rampaging iron boner. I had a hardon like I'd taken a speedball of Viagra and powdered rhino horn. My body had gotten so used to "diphenhydramine=imminent cum" that it turned my wang into a battering ram the moment the chemical hit my system, with zero erotic stimulus.

Beware pavlov's boner, anons. It's real, and it's easy to provoke.

>tfw im open with my mother about my drug use and she tolerates it since she knows its only dudeweed and kratom

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This, for real. They would buy some weird tech to avoid knocking? People in my parent's house would just start with trying the knob, total horseshit.

I put a lock on my door as soon as I could. A deadbolt. Family wasn't happy about it but they can fuck off.

And then I moved out as soon as I could and they all got upset. Ha

Don't knock steel reserve, it's an American institution. Also, you can get 4 tallboys for $7 or a 12 pack for $11.

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>Jow Forums
wrong board m8
But I'll take 20
also
>what is locking your door

Thats exactly what I mean though; why would I buy a doorknob that actually works/locks when I could pick up 4 steel reserves instead

When I was growing up we had an intercom in our house. It was awesome. I didn't even realise other people didn't have them till I was like 12 years old.

Well first of all, kids have no right to privacy in their parent's home. Door should be open at all times, unless changing.

Have fun walking in on your kids wanking all the time. Im sure they love you so much.

you sound like you would be a horrible parent fucking totalitarian

I've been jerking off lying down in bed for 14 years and now I can't cum standing up or even sitting, I have to lay down and stretch my toes out like a retard.

>Over at rich asian girls house in the rich part of town
>watching a movie in her home theater
>we start making out
>Bing bong! It's the intercom
>(mom) "Did you bla blah blah do your chores?"
>"YES MOM"
>call ends
>keep making out

How did poor fags compete?
This was my one victory as a teen but still.

kids have nothing to hide. if they do, it is usual wrong or immoral. clearly you have never been a kid before.

you shouldnt know everything that your kids do

>kids have nothing to hide. if they do, it is usual wrong or immoral

Another bad parent flag
Everyone has secrets you fag.
It's better to let your kids know they can tell you anything and talk to you without fear than lording over their lives like a king.

That's how you get shannon sneaking chad inside at 2 am to fuck her brains out when you're asleep

it is the nature of kids to be deceptive, limiting privacy keeps them from going down the shithole. learn about child rearing.

kid's don't have secrets, if they do it is because they are hiding wrong doing.

>That's how you get shannon sneaking chad inside at 2 am to fuck her brains out when you're asleep
Let him keep thinking its safe to raise kids this way though; we need more shannons in the world

>it’s too hard to tell my kid it’s time for dinner I better install a fucking doorbell to notify him when his microwave dindin is ready

sneaking in to fuck her brains out?
soooo you agree that kids should not have their doors closed.

i'd finish wanking and cum right on the fucking bell, and then smash it in the kitchen and grab my tea.

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>child rearing
Yeah I bet you rear them real good you fucking child molester

You are projecting fucking hard my man, privacy is very important. Do you think the 4th amendment is bullshit because we should all have nothing to hide? Kill yourself

No i mean they do it to spite you because you sound like a piece of shit

kids need fear, without fear we get niggers with no respect for authority who think they can run through the streets looting without consequence.

> then ring it from elsewhere e.g. the kitchen when they want them to come out of their room for tea or whatever.

All parents just text their kids now you know. What the fuck is this retardation?

come on nu/pol/, you know this isn't an argument. it's just embarassing.

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kids have no rights in the parents home.

Life must have been shit for them. I wasn't even rich neither, but we still had an intercom. My dad fitted it since he liked tech stuff and with 4 kids it would otherwise be a lot of shouting.

that's fine. if they are old enough and do not want to live by house rules, they can leave.

What the fuck happened to knocking on the door?

>can fuck endlessly as long as you don't lay down
>bad thing

>he doesnt have proximity sensors and pin hole cameras to monitor when a fapping session is about to be interrupted (or improved ;))

and way to conflate rights for adults with discipline for kids.
I will not kill myself because i would never make such a retarded conflation.
you sound like one of those anti-spanking types.

Can't they just knock?

>Don't knock steel reserve, it's an American institution
So's the fucking IRS, doesn't make it a good thing. It's some vile shit, on so many levels, and not really fit for human consumption. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking it because I'm some kind of elitist; I've drank my share of Steel Reserve 211 and then some; I've done more High Gravity training than fucking Goku. I'm just speaking from experience when I say you're better off just not introducing that particular poison to your body.

I'm a virgin

That would be valid if niggers weren't raised on fear.

Children don't have rights? You sound like one of those Muslim rapists.

> people in my parents house would just start by trying the knob ?

>not shoving it up your ass to cum harder
>not having your mom walk in to see your asshole light up as you shoot out a 12" rope

You fucking faggots

>Buying a device to avoid knocking
The absolute state of modern life

My mum took down the bedroom door to make sure I never wanked

to resell them?

Good. Find a traditional woman to impress with your sexual stamina and repopulate the white race with your toes pointed.

user is right. Kids have no rights. Daughters are for raping. Praise Allah

Fucking hell, why did you have to remind me of this.
>be me
>be stoned
>wanking feels good stoned, start to wank
>mom comes into room, way too high to make the connection between (parent approaching)-(hide that dick, click that X)
>she leaves the room, shuts the door
>brain starts to click
>FML. Most awkward days followed.

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Should've looked her in the eyes while finishing.

way to conflate protecting kids through the use of clearly defined rules and boundaries set by parents with pedophilia.
you sound like a david hogg

Working on it, although she's a little olive skinned.

that you think addressing the leftist nature of kids by parenting them with strict rules and standards of behavior is akin to rape, is quite in line with your flag.

You've completely failed to define anything so all I'm left with is conflation and speculation.

Discipline to one person is child abuse to another.

Leftist nature of kids? Are you fucking retarded?

What kid wants to share his toys?

What kid wants to hang out with stinky niggers?

You're actually fucking brain dead.

fapping is degenerate

>yfw it acts as pavlovian conditioning and you start popping wood every time someone rings the doorbell

this must be that rape culture I hear so much about.
So can I expect you to be marching in the streets sometime soon protesting for sexual, financial, religious, and political rights for kids? Maybe sign some petitions seeking to tear kids away from parents who dare to set rules and curfews for their kids?
sounds like a typical tuesday in canada

yep I'm retarded.
selfish, hence the leftism
leftists exhibit all the qualities of children.
glad you unwittingly figured that out.

Are you sure she didn't take it down because she wanted to see you wank?

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