Why aren't you becoming a border patrol agent?

>an actual good idea
Thanks OP

Yeah. Defend New Mexico from ... Mexicans...

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>have to learn Spanish
>have to live near the boarder
>have to deal with actual Mexicans all day
Nah

I'd send her back anyways

They kept me waiting for ~six months, and rejected me after my structured interview. I had to jump through so many hoops to get to that point (entrance exam, health exam, fitness exam, background check, etc).
Fucking cunts, it's their loss if they don't want people that actually care about securing the border and instead just want to hire a bunch of spics

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I because I make a hell of a lot more money than they do already.

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I am this winter

The pay generally sucks at any entry position, usually what people do is take jobs at places people don't want to go and get incentive pay to be there.

I don't want to freeze to death

I even got past the interview. It was the polygraph that got me. I didn’t even lie about anything. They just kept asking me the same 5 questions repeatedly and couldn’t get good results so I failed.

I'm color deficient. I guess the Gov thinks you need to see colors in order to discriminate against them.

fml

Because it's 99,9% driving through a hot desert

she can stay

You dumb? Border patrol agents make pretty damn good money, especially if you stay in for a long time.

They make less than a lot of local cops.

ill bite. what were the questions user?

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I'm actually applying. Passed the opening test. But honestly I probably won't make it. I've lost a few jobs in my past, when I was more foolish and self centered. Thinking of dropping out of the process and reapplying in 8 years or so when I've proved I'm a reliable man. Better do something else now and try later than be found unsuitable now and banned forever.

I have a criminal record of raping a Mexican girl

"Law enforcement" makes six figures. Kill yourself shill with this fake 'cops don't make money' meme.

So instead of making $150,000 they make $100,000.

what questions? Polygraphs scare the shit out of me but I've done some fucked up shit in life

Do they accept fat lazy fucks? What are the requirements?

Don't you have to know Spanish to even apply?

Give me American citizenship and I'll do it.

I've also heard their poly is insane (4-8 hours) and the administrators fail people to justify their jobs. I do have a masters degree in CJ, so maybe they'd take that into account in the background. But as much as I'd love it, I don't think they'd take me as I am right now, unless the're under so much government pressure they've dropped standards a bit and give guys like me a shot.

You have to be some kind of reject pussy to resort to border patrol. Ugh.

"Chad big guy meat bag, if you're not this then you're weak and can't do it" fake nonsense shilling faggot. Kill yourself.

>guys like me
What's wrong with you user?

Pardon?

What are you even trying to say, please take your meds

Were you permanently rejected or can you reapply?

Jow Forums is an army of rejected pussies duh.

See My employment record isn't the best. Not proud of it, just used to be more foolish. No involvement with the law or criminal record or anything though. Just thinking about waiting till some of that's further in my rear view.

Why would I? Trump refused to fund the wall so Israel gets some extra shekels, which shows where his priorities lie.

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How hard is the structured interview?

Six month waiting period, but I doubt I'll reapply after the way they dicked me around
Yeah, even if I passed the SI, they probably would have failed me at the polygraph. I hear they love failing people out on that one for no reason. I've never done any drugs or committed any crimes, yet somehow Carlos who got arrested for possessing weed in high school and has a few eses working for the cartels can become a BP agent. What a fucking joke

That doesn't actually matter. It's just another possible excuse to fail someone if they don't want them. Law enforcement is niggered and criminal and mafia'd as all fuck, and these are not stellar high quality people, they're regular motherfuckers, actually much worse than regular motherfucker, total sadists and psychopaths (but that's the nice among humans that they want). You think anyone really cares about some stupid gay polygraph test? If they want you then they'll accept you even if you don't do "well" on a polygraph or have blemishes on your criminal record. If they don't want you then they'll refuse you even if you do "well" on a polygraph.

They are gonna be the 1st ones rekt by the surprise Russian attack. No thx.

I cannot drive.

I'm saying he's or you're a faggot shill, shilling for the stocky faggot archetype that you have a faggoty hard on for

Implying they know enough about you to even care. The poly is just another dumb way to narrow down the applicants. People who should fail pass sometime and people who should pass fail sometimes.

I'd love to but my age is too old.

t. 38yo

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Actual BP agent here stationed out of Juarez.

You would not believe the amount of Mexican pussy I get as a result of this job. I've gotten so much spic pussy, just because they're terrified I'll deport them, it's amazing.

These women will do just about ANYTHING to stay.

>deep throat
>anal
>two mexicunts at the same time
>swallow thick loads
>lick my asshole

Shit, I've had women offer me their teenage daughters just to stay.

proof? otherwise this will be seen as a gay ass larp.

>pls gib evidence that will cost you your job

You retarded, son?

Basement dweller larping at its ugliest
Clearly not fit for service/nigger mentality

Assuming you're telling the truth, any advice for the background investigation/structured interview? Can you make the cut with a few job losses in your past?

Any faggot would do all those things for free.

There's no border to guard, except the Eastern ones which are relatively safe.
Besides, shitskins aren't really our thing - thanks.

Lie. If you're a terrible liar, then you have some growing to do. This job or any high paying job isn't for you.

Fags burn in hell.

Fuck you nigger. I'm out here railing 90lb latina poon, while you're shitposting on a siamese noodle cutting board.

so showing your work shirt or something will cost you your job? we're not asking for your badge number faggot.

The Californian cops tape the shit outta taxpayers

That's more of a white person job it wouldn't be right if I was doing it as a biracial human being

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Why do you keep saying that in every thread?

How are the fish sticks at the JIDF cafeteria?

Kek, lying on a Homeland background is a YUGE roll of the dice.

Fucking this

You think I should be willing to risk a life of being overpaid to intimidate brownlets and fuck their women till their cunts are dripping wet, just so you can believe me?

Ask yourself what exactly you think being a BP entails. We exist to keep the brown menace in check and that's it. If it means seeding brown pussy every god damn day, then so be it.

border patrol are like at least 80% spics

lmao

Work on visualizing what you believe they want from you. A lie is merely the fulfillment of expectation, even if imaginary.

>Fuck you nigger. I'm out here railing 90lb latina poon, while you're shitposting on a siamese noodle cutting board.
That's as easy as getting a Cheeseburger, vato.
Actually You're on this board as much as I am.
Fuck You fat mapuche animal. Nigger mentality.

yeah because you're an overweight larping jack off sitting in your room

It's pretty much impossible unless you've been a squeaky clean autist who sits in his room and never does anything illegal. I saw somewhere 80% of applicants failed the polygraph

If there was no polygraph I would certainly do it

Same, a polygraph essentially disqualifies me from any position requiring one

Ridiculous LARP shills (you) should be strangled.

Well that, and the fact that all of us on this website are/were probably on some watchlist that prevents us from federal employment

No thanks Americans only.

That can't be true. Plenty of dudes on Jow Forums are ex military or clearance holders. I doubt visiting a popular image board is a death sentence.

they're such bullshit honestly

Just tell the truth. On of my friends is a border patrol agent who works down near El Paso. He said 80% of people fail the polygraph. And most of those guys bomb out on the drug question. When they first apply they fill out the application form which asks, "Have you ever used an illegal drug such as marijuana, cocaine, etc." People fill that out and say no because they think they won't get hired if they say yes. Then they get strapped into the polygraph and the guy asks, "Have you ever used an illegal drug..." If they say yes, they get booted for lying on the federal application. If they say no, they get pinged for lying by the detector.

Truth is, the border patrol doesn't give a fuck what kind of drugs you've done in the past, or what you've done in the past (as long as you don't have a felony conviction). What they care about is whether you tell the truth or not and as long as you tell the truth, even if it's ugly, you can still get a job because they're fucking desperate.

Squeeze your ass really tight, you'll beat it.

Jobless wetbacks can't even cope with the fact that I'm plowing your mothers and sisters on the daily. Hell, I may even be one of your fathers.

Feels good. I'm gonna bleach the shitskin out of your people, wetbacks.

Polygraph questions
>”So user it says here under your MAC address that you’ve created 847 anti-nigger threads and 731 pro nazi threads on some anime website. Do you deny this?”
I dindu nuffin

Nice Srba u got there prijatelju

99% failure rate
1% pass on 10th attempt

obama's sneaky way to sabotage border security
and the consequence of hiring diversity

Man is that really true? BP is that desperate? I've been stressing out over jobs i've lost thinking they'll reject me for it.

Don't tell him that man, he may actually try it.

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Is there a pension?

Because you need four years of prior law enforcement experience, and most police agencies require two years of prior law service (bailiff, meter maid) before they'll hire you on as a rookie. So at a minimum you need to be a cop in some capacity for six years. And speak Spanish. And move to Texas.

Where do I sign up?

>spanish
fuck, nvm

why cut your hair short if your going to be in the sun all the time, at least keep it long enough to keep your head and ear protected from sun burn.

I dont speak mexican, that seems to be a necessary requirement

I don't think that's a requirement.

I really want to. I'm 29, and graduated a year ago as a Mechanical Engineer. I still don't have a job. I'm afraid they won't take me though because of my lack of work experience. A year gap since college looks pretty bad. I have a really good GPA but I don't know if that will be enough.

I also have a job interview on Wednesday so I may be getting my first job finally. If I get this job I might try to become a BPA after I have a year or so of work history.

There's no need to border patrol here because there are just leafs on the other side but the people in Yukon are alright

that aint no gringo

Because of their stupid fucking polygraph tests and intimidation methods. side note: the dude who lives behind me has a 15yr old that smokes weed pretty much 23hrs a day with his friends. He's border patrol.

It's awesome too.. when you fail that FEDERALLY ADMINISTERED polygraph test, it's permanent record shit.

My little brother is a faggot druggy tattoo covered shit skin and they hired him to be a cop. Have you actually ever seen a border patrol agent? It's fucking hilarious ever since 9/11 we have towel heads doing airplane security and the Mexicans guard the god damned border.

Can someone please let me in on this meme. I see it used all the time by autist on /v/. Just trying to get a rise out of spics for using gringo incorrectly?

You don't need prior LE experience. It helps, but it's not mandatory.