Things you won't hear a black person say

I have to go to work.

I have raised you since birth son

I love being white.

Maybe I should return this iPhone instead of making threads on Jow Forums

>i just finished mowing my lawn

Sir, you dropped your tv!

ask (ax)

>Good day, Officer!

>pardon me
>I have this extra change
>do you perchance need to buy a bus ticket?

Think I'll go swimming.

I do recognize the physiological and psychological difference between the different admixtures of the human race and that my race has the mental capacity of a silverback gorilla

Maybe it's my own fault that I'm going to jail.

gee willickers

OP isn’t a fag

I did do something

I'm thinking of becoming a competitive swimmer...

Your mom and I are concerned about the kind of company you're keeping

Gotta go to work. I won't take any government gibz.

lost

I'm sorry, I was incorrect.

Look at this innocent undeveloped country, we should invade and despoil it of its goods, rape its women and enslave its men.

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Anything with more than 2 syllables.

kek

Wakanda or Bust!

I have to leave now. I don't want to be late for work.

Don't insult gorillas like that user.

Here is your wallet you dropped.

We were not kangz

Keep the change.

A black what?

Yahtzee!

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a fucking lmao

i do

I invented this!

I should be more responsible

Man it's nice to live in a nice neighbourhood

fpbp

Sorry guys, I can't go out partying. I have to work in the morning

I read Drew's book and he said he was such a dork he showed up at a frat party with a arm full of board games like Risk and Avalon Hill games. I once sent a challenge to him via ABC mail to play a game or Axis and Allies on a giant stage accompanied by girls on roller scats dressed like WW2 map room girls moving the pieces with Pool Table granny sticks .

Still waiting

my dick is actually average

i dont have a criminal record

underrated

"Yeah, that was my fault".

Dad I had an A+ today!

He a bad boy, he did everything.

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Underrated

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Dragonball Z was mediocre

dad

Are you hiring?

>Dad!
FTFY

Thank you white America for not sending me back to Africa.