I want out of this hell hole. My vision has been corrupted by the toxicity that's bred by this damned site to the point where I see race in fucking everything. I can't stop looking at skulls, I can't stop thinking I'm above or below anyone.
While everything I have learned here may be 100% true. I don't want to spend my life discussing how much I should hate niggers, or how often I should actively avoiding contact with them in public. I deep down DON'T want to hate blacks or any minority for that matter. Because that's just makes me feel icky in side and it's not the kind of person I am. But this stuff is just glued to my mind daily and only drags me down, and doesn't actually solve a god damn thing, or lift me up. It only make she feel even more hopeless.
I honestly wish the days were I was blissfully ignorant to the facts regarding race. I actually had a life and friends. I was actually starting my career as a musician, doing live shows and recording my music meeting chicks and making friends. But now, I'm stuck working a tedious job, making a shitty wage, just to come home afterwards and argue with ideologues anonymously on the internet, people who will honestly never change their minds no matter what you say or where they fall on the political spectrum. It's all pointless.
And no, I don't want to be "friends" with literal autistic genetic dead-end NEETS with an extreme in-group preference who only seem to care about someone's ancestry.
Holy shit, I ironically wish I was still a normie with normal thoughts and opinions. This experience is just so life draining. Anyone else feel the same?
>inb4 cuck
No. Even if I do leave, I will still retain these facts, I just won't consciously act on them depending on the situation.
