My wife just gave me a blowjob. It was fucking unreal. She deep throated me and slobbered all over it and I came in her mouth. She also makes dinner for me every night. I'm laying in bed now ready to get a comfy sleep before I go to work tomorrow and repeat the process again. When I asked her how I got so lucky, she says because you treat me so good and I love you.
Enjoy your fleshlight tonight you enormous race traitor faggots.
She didn't massage your prostate? Worthless cunt.
“Now that’s fucking based”
Her boyfriend out of town?
I’m going to screen shot this post and fap to it forever.
>making a post about a blowjob.
If your girl doesn't suck your dick at every opportunity she ain't your girl.
When I ejaculate I have a burning pain, I got tested for STDs but nothing turned up. Help did I jack it too much?
How many kids you got Rabbi?
I bet your wife would give me a blowie joey if I asked her nicely
You ought not to have caused any permanent damage unless you're way overboard. Take this opportunity to do a few short runs of nofap in case there's something irritated or inflamd that needs some time to return to normal. If that doesn't work then ask your doc.
Yeah she gave me the same thing this morning.
>way overboard
Is no lube five times daily for fifteen years “overboard”?
>Enjoy your fleshlight
I will thanks
Yeah, that's kind of a lot. And no lube 5 times a day if you're cut sounds pretty horrible. It's probably a good idea in general to lay off.
Not that there's anything wrong with jacking it 5 times a day once in a while.
It's because your foreskin was used as a beauty product. The whole point of the foreskin is to collect smegma which is used as a natural lube. It's why I only wash my dick every 2 weeks.
LARPing as your father again, leaf? That's the spirit!
True :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
My gf is voracious about it and loves sucking me off in public places. I know it’s gonna get us in trouble eventually. Fucked her mouth in a bar that had a photo booth, then a week or so later she begged me to cum in her mouth in an alleyway after we spent a few hours dancing at a club.
Apex though was right before we were exclusive, I came in a virgin blonde girls mouth in the morning and went to her in the evening, where she proceeded to make me cum twice with her throat before I could go soft
Honestly bros I could die tomorrow and feel happy about it
no one cares
die spamming faggot
Dear God....
The fuck am i looking at
if you're cut you aren't white
you death gripped your cock so hard you fucked up your urethra, but it's temporary, it needs time to heal, just stop beating your meat for a month or two. this is not a post i thought i'd be typing tonight
>once every 2 weeks
lol if I did that even with my jewdick it would stink like hell and be all greasy grossy to touch.
fpbp what a stupid bitch
>She deep throated
you married the town bicycle then
(also sage & hide this thread)
BUT I DID NOT GET A SAY IN THE MATTER
FUUUUUUUCK
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I JUS WAN MY DICK BACK
FUUUUUUCK
I WOULD RATHER BE A NIGGER THAN CUT
FUUUUUUUUUUCK
>before I go to work tomorrow
>work
>deepthroated
>town bicycle
Probably, but also bulimic girls are great at it and a godsend
a thread died for this maplefaggotry
>in all fields
degenerate
this, ex-fatty girls who puked/starved themselves to skinny give the best deep throats, and they still have the enthusiasm of a fat girl. to be honest, if you get one of these elusive creatures -- marry them, not even joking.
...
take a dose of nofap user nobody likes a guy who faps to fucking children
what the lucky girl's name? James?
Congrats on getting six stickers.
Jesus fucking christ
irk he doesn't even have a codeword system to differentiate his inside vs. outside clothes in order to hide his power level. My system is based around the colors of spray paint I use to mark the different laundry bags in order to separate loads of laundry.
you don’t get deep throughed by your own wife, you fucking degenerate leaf.
my mom made me label my clothes because i kept mak,ing people uncomfortbale
You know what youre looking at
stop it.
>wasting his seed.
what a faggot.
Take a fucking break from Jacking off dude. Could be an injured eurethra, could be soap residue, could be whatever you are using for lube. could even be a low level bacterial infection.
I guess larping > cucked so its kinda an improvement... maybe the leafs are turning over a new ...?
I had this a few times, it's ants
This isn't your erotic stories board fucking degenerate
Funny you say that, because here we have a torture method where we insert ants in the subject's urethra
underrated
spbp
>Apex
kys
this its a terrible idea that can only end with some people being shoot.
a 5 minute blowjob, makes up for 35 years of working for a boss who is incompetent, a company who will offshore your job, and a government which will take your money and support those who don't want to work with it.
lmao.
>baby sideburns
What was ment by this???
Deepthroat is a porn meme that feels wrong. Roof of the mouth and teeth. Porn has ruined oral sex.
Chicks need retraining to do it properly.
CHAD
Lmao you are like a schoolgirl seeking validation from strangers. God damn you are a faggot
>pic related
10/10
Holy christ my sides..
Dont go too crazy with fido.
>kissing something you put your dick into
lmao
any woman willing to put a dick in her mouth is not a woman worth respecting
Yeah right! She'd want at least 500 good boy points.
You sound like the kind of guy who hasn't tried to see if he can suck his own cock.
I have not, because I do not want a penis in my mouth, not even my own.
Masturbation is fine, but I think sucking your own dick would be way too much effort for too little payoff.
Lol you see surprised, like it doesn't happen often. How did she get so good I wonder?
That's what guys who can commonly report, but it's still something I would definitely want to try just to find out what it's like. Kind of like prostate stimulation is amazing and worth trying, but I think really only worth the effort once in a blue moon.
And tonight I dine
and the meat I eat
is my complete and
total defeat owned by
(You)
this whole blowjob thing is clearly a big deal to you. huh, that implies quite a few things indeed...
Wut?
I cannot properly convey my disgust in words
Letting the mouth you kiss suck your dick? Gross man.
Good God.
As a man who owns 2 fleshlights I can understand
But fuck pedo shit
Jesus fucking christ they sound like the holy grail
>You will never find one
Are you on any meds?
I was on some antidepressants that caused my pc muscle and urethra to burn like hellfire every time I blew.
>He's going to get raped in divorce court.
I hope you think of this post when you find out she's cheating on you.
No one cares if a chink gets his dick sucked.
>My wife just gave me a blowjob. It was fucking unreal
I had her. She's awful. Her sister is much better.
Nice work, leaf.
Is that what the japanese fap with?
This post drew the redditors out of hiding. Good job user.
Would you do it, anons?
My lawyer has advised me not to answer this question.
>game of thrones
>šòy
What went so wrong?
>game of thrones
>not onions
Soibois love the electric jew.
What I mean is: when did the tumblrinas get into it?
Anyone have that cringy GoT bar webm?
S1E1
What do you say when your mom brings you dinner?
itadakimasu
^o^
MY MOM MADE ME LABEL MY CLOTHES BECAUSE I WAS MAKING PEOPLE UNCOMROTBLE
What does that even mean
>What does that even mean
He doesn't know.
>She deep throated me and slobbered all over it and I came in her mouth
Kek I wonder how much other cock she sucked and fucked to learn that technique. Does that keep you up at night?
>always wears his trench coat with his cargo shorts and Hatsune Miku tee and unclipped sketchers
>inb4 37
She fucks me when you're at work, and she treats you so well because she feels guilty that she's kissing you with the tongue that cleans my anus.
the pussy must be shit
Your wife, huh
I bet she’s quite the butterball
I’m worried about your dick too bro