How the hell are you supposed to get a job in the year of 2018? I mean look at this shit

>I mean look at this shit.
Shit it is! Somebody photoshopped the 1 in "General Labor 1 year" The above paragraph says "no experience required"

All you fucking idiots fell for it This is a slide thread, LET IT DIE!!!

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You need one year experience for a Tim Hortons job.

Think that's bad?

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>university degree in management, college HNC in business studies.
I found your problem.

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>Not moving to china and being treated like a god while teaching kids English 20 hrs a week

Have fun trying to stay on the sinking ship.

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>office job is turning me into a weak bitch with shitty posture

I would actually love to do some manual labour again but I'd have to take a huge pay cut.

I think they just want some kind of work experience. Not specifically shoveling.

>move to china
>get lung cancer after 3 years

General labour ie, yard work, ch urch work, moving things for school. Etc. Be creative. If you dont have 1 year general labour by 18 you spent you're entire life in a bubble.

Protip to this western shit fest life: lie when you can get away with it

You can tell Jow Forums is full of high schoolers because just look at this garbage heap shit of job postings that aren't even that bad.

These people will commit suicide with absolute certainty when they realize it only gets harder from there.

Fucking cringe thread holy shit.

>still studying
>no experience
>no work for the past 4 years

>sent about 7 emails over the course of 5-6 months
>got 3 replies
>2 interviews
>1 job

Super hard dudes.... I didn't even want a job. I was enjoying the unibum lifestyle.

Over saturation of degrees in the work queue. Everyone going out and getting a college degree should be a good thing, but of course, they snatch up every career until there aren't any left, and soon, you end up in the situation we have, in which more people have college education than careers are available, so people with law degrees are working as garbage collectors and janitors now.
And that means the uneducated are competing with the educated for menial jobs now, which the latter wins every time. These degrees are toilet paper now. Chris Rock's "Dropped out in the tenth grade, but may as well drop out in the second, because you'd have at least eight extra years of work experience" is starting to become painfully true for all Americans.

Every expert on the subject mentions that more jobs require a degree now; you will need a college education to get every single job in the future. Imagine not being allowed to screw on someone's toilet seat without 4 years education on it. That's the future.

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>say youve worked with an uncle/your dad/whover doing (insert manual labor here) on their side business

these interviews almost NEVER actually call your references.

and if you cant fucking lie your way THROUGH A JOB THAT REVOLVES AROUND SHOVELING, then youre basically fucked mate.

t. boomer who would riot if the same was being done to him.

I like how pol redpills on capitalism.

Stop being stupid and go into the trades

>make something of yourself
Boomer detected

how much does a big mac cost in your country?

>live in america
>get lead poisoning from the tap water

inb4 >live in sweden, get handgrenaderaped by (((refugee)))

Just lie.

how can they say this shit?

imagine if you said you only wanted straight, white, Christian land-owning males to work in your company.

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>live in sweden
>jerk off to cuck porn
>go to jail for being white
yeah i'm fine here thanks

Its manual labour. Offer to volunteer for a week. If they see you are competent they will take you on. Its as simple as that.

luckyfuck. ive applied to the local supermarkets over 20x. got interviewed 7x. no job. mcdonalds, kfc and burger kang never even called me. the only people who work there are hispanics in their 40s. and then they all have 1 elderly token black

>obviously using a shovel requires at least 1 year of experience of using a shovel
1 year of general labor includes things like operating a lawn mower. Besides, it says no experience necessary right in the body of the message. Do you understand what "General Labor" is? Planting a flower is general labor.

it clearly states no experience needed

This.
>Apply for management position at local hardware store
>send them a CV saying I went to university even thought I dropped out of college and worked at McDonalds
>they hire me even though I missed the job interview because they called back a week later and asked if I was still interested in the position
>never have to show any documents or anything

It says no experience needed. You can lie eitherway.

Do these retards not realize that if every delivery job required 3+ years of experience that eventually no one could possibly be hired?

Pretty easy actually.
You just gotta learn to be confident in talks.
I applied for job requiring 3yrs of exp, I got none.
Still got it.
Programming if you wonder which field.

None of those job listing look that ridiculous. The worst is the Baker which if you really wanted to, you could probably start as a cashier in a bakery and get time/experience with the ovens. The rest are either 12 to 40 hours and don't require crazy degress or certifications or knowledge of something esoteric. If you're not allergic to moving your body and lifting stuff you can just lie about experience and get called to an interview at least. You sound like those NEETS who just click stuff on Craigslist and whine about being unemployed despite never actually applying anywhere.

i dont think you realize how old delivery drivers are and how long they stay with a company. most ive seen are middle aged indians and i still see the same one from years ago every now and then. companies dont plan on retraining the new guys. theres always a desperate immigrant out there

Yeah thats what my buddy does he's had bout 11 jobs the last 4 years he just lies about his experience and shit to get different jobs when he either rage quits or gets fired for raging. He's sociopathic though so its easier for him to do i guess.

lol this cuck actually bows down and follows the Experience requirements. Nigger when I was job searching I applied to everything, I didn't give a shit. I got callbacks and interviews and they never even mentioned it. Landed a job and now I'm set.

nigger, it clearly states that the job requirements are reliable transportation and a DL. Indeed requires that question. Either apply and be a pothole filler or fuck off.

I've been a delivery driver and it took me precisely one delivery to get a hang of it. In what world do you need three fucking years to be competent at that job

>Boy that STEM degree was worth it!

It says any previous work experience of 1 year, most likely either because the site requires to fill that bit or because they just want someone who can literally show up on time and in right place.

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>using a shovel requires at least 1 year of experience of using a shovel.
Lol no, They're looking for people who are psychically fit from working hard. And they can't say no cripples, soys & fags cuz labor laws.

The announcer literally wrote "no experience need", just apply you lazy neet

lie, fucking retard.

> "special/equal"

AHHAHAHAHA FUCK IT HURTS

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Yeah, it's the same here. I'm at uni and even a part time low skilled job at my local Tesco requires tonnes of references and at least one years experience. Shits going to get worse thanks to importing niggers and automation. Thanks Boomers.

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Everyone in this thread without a job is retarded or scared of hard work. You faggots.

I have a degree in graphic design and am a self-thought coder with HTML, CSS, JS and PHP to make a step into web-design.
Yet I am cleaning toilets for a living.
You can't be more pathetic than me.

How does someone who’s never been fucking arrested even know how to “submit a police clearance”.

They give requirements so that not just every asshole, basedboy/feminist will bother applying.

If you are 18 and have no experience, have your dad pretend to be a former boss and put him on your resume as a reference and having done summer work that you worked your ass off.

The worst that can happen is they throw your resume in the garbage which they do to many people anyways.

Isn't Germany known for it's great apprenticeships? I'm almost finished uni and i regret going to uni but might as well finish it, all my mates instead went for trades in Engineering and got tonnes of job offers and make good wages. I think trades will become more valuable than degrees soon as the economy begins to change.

My favourites are:
>more than 1 year experience, no more than 3

numbnuts.
it clearly says NO EXPERIENCE NEEDED in the specific tasks of being a construction site gopher, but they want you to at least have "showed up" someplace sometime cuz they dont have time for tween angst and teen drama.

fuck, they will work with your parole/probation officer for fucks sake.
if you cant meet these... ummm... "qualifications" i guess? then perhaps Taco Bell or Starcucks is the "career" for you.

Taking care of your property counts as general labour right? Just make up some shit it's not hard

>company comes to school job fair saying they're hiring all shifts
>walk into plant
>give manager my resume
>shake his hand and tell him I want a job
>he says they're not really hiring right now
wtf Jow Forums you said this would work

I know this feeling, I only had work before and the summer after community college, was at a normal college for 3 years and got a similar amount of interviews and a job by just going to the 2 job fairs they had at my school and by applying to shit on LinkedIn.

My best advice for anyone in the thread is to play the numbers game and to not be afraid to apply for jobs that request things you don't have. I'm in software engineering, and the amount of places that asked for things like C# but didn't care if I actually had it were insane.

Please to be having 5 years experience with Windows Server 2016.

t. Pajeet

lie.

Tell him you spent all summer knee deep in bullshit and horseshit. Don't tell him that this was actually just time on Jow Forums.

> hiring a baker.
> expecting he ACTUALLY BE A GOD DAMNED BAKER!!!
how dare they!
dipshit, this aint "entry level" shit, go fuck yourself. nobody cares that you cant find a job you think fitting to your stature

nobody will hire you to be CEO of a multinational bank for a million dollarie-doors an hour? fuck. might as well stay on benefits! see ya at the centrelink, ya cunt!

>move to China
>get crushed to death by escalator
no thank you

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Nah I've been unemployed applying to 1-2 jobs for 4 months and can count the number of replies on one hand. I've been working part time whilst in uni and 4 years later I've got a degree,left part time job to move 200 miles to a more relevant job which they then decided they didn't need done (only a week after I'd started).Job market here is shit and many of them have diversity quotas.

>"no experience needed"
>Experience: General Labor 1 Year

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degree being masters in engineering

I am 28, and have nevet been unemployed for more than 2 weeks since I turned 16. Here's some stuff that helped me along the way.

1. Any work is good. It beats being broke, and hungry, or mooching off mom and dad.

2. After you turn in an application, send a letter to whoever you put in the application to. Whether it be a person, or an HR desk. Then a week later, show up in person and introduce yourself. Tell them you put in an application, and wanted to put a face with a name. If you're even a little lucky, you may wind up with an impromptu interview. Dress decent, shower, shave and haircut.

3. When you get an interview, show up at least 15 minutes early, with a pen and a notepad. Even if you arent thrilled about the job prospect take a few small notes about what the job entails.

4. Keep your head held high and walk like you have a pair for god sake. Make good eye contact. Ask questions if you have them.

I've done everything from shovel shit and throw hay to work in a nursing home begore I found what I wanted to do with my life. Having a long job history has made it possible for me even though I don't have a degree. Get started early. Make some fucking money.

> hotel hiring maintenance worker
> must have all skills required to build hotel
> must have own tools
> must bring materials
> guaranteed long term employment after you finish building a hotel for us...
> must provide real estate and permits...

now these cunts are fucking stupid.

What's wrong with this one?

>tfw have rich jew uncle that hired me at one of his companies right out of college

I mean the interviewer didn’t even know that I’m his nephew so I still had to nail the interview, but success in life is mostly who you know not what you know. I have a lot of respect for the people that are successful without having lots of connections to start with. It takes a lot of hard work and a special person to come from nothing and become something.

>no experience needed
: Experience: General Labor: 1 year

hmmmm

best advice.

I've done the same. Never been unemployed for more than a month and it's for those exact reasons. If you want work, go and get it.

Or entitled. Sorry, but I'm not working like a nigger just so I can eat. Get me that universal basic income shit, so food and shelter are taken care of, and I may use my free time to get a medical degree and spend the rest of my life curing you fuckers' diseases. Otherwise, the whole of mankind can fuck off.

I bet they don't have a gender equality strategy in place

old fag here, retired at 54, own 3 properties and won't have to work any more. high school drop out, some college (no degree)
self taught at many different skills, auto mechanic, retail, electronics calibration, admin stuff, computers (network, build, helpdesk, network admin, exchange e-mail admin, sccm admin, network security), i could go on.
years ago companies didn't care what your degree was in, history degree- you can be our factory rep.
now they are looking for specific degrees and or skills
not everyone is cut out or can afford to spend years in college
there are labor jobs that pay very well, sometimes more than the high paying white collar jobs.
the best advice i can dish out is to look for a career that has a future, mechanic, funeral jobs...
not everyone is going to be the ceo, cfo, cio, most of us are worker bees.
think how many niggers spend their entire school years trying to make it to the top of a sport hoping that it will lead to a pro contract, thousands or millions but only a few hundred make it

Here's a really shitty job offer.
>$19-$21 an hour
>no benefits
>requires 4 year Chemistry degree
>requires 7 years experience

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Go to jail for work experience

>I mean the interviewer didn’t even know that I’m his nephew

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>apprenticeships
Yes, it's the easiest way actually. Personally I made the mistake to study and not build conntacts during that time. I should have left school with 18 and learn a simple job, going for trading like everyone else. Uni is a meme, in my opinion. I regret it too.

whoops wrong one, still a shitty job

>no experience needed
>here’s how many years of experience you need

Not denying my Jewish heritage here senpai. I’m just saying she seemed very surprised when she found out after I’d already been hired.

you never took a summer job in manual labor?

Yall realize thats not a requirement usually and most companies are willing to bend that if you interview well and actually have some experience?

:( Uni truly is a meme. I don't even know why everybody falls for it. One of my friends actually done a degree in Engineering and still had to work in shitty jobs, he then done an apprenticeship with the Royal Air Force and now he does really well, im reluctant to do a trade after doing a degree though as ill be reaching my late 20s by the time i finish.

I got a job at BMW by networking through the owner of a coffee shop I visited daily. I didn't stay at the job due to school, but I got 13 months of experience that helped me get a job when I graduated.
The trick is to go out and make friends with someone more powerful than you and then get to someone more powerful than your friend until you reach someone willing to help you out.

Or go to trade school and live decent on a tough but well paying job