How do I convert to Christianity?

>i've decided to worship some 2000 year old kike

great, more bluepilled faggots is exactly what Jow Forums needed

Jow Forums is a reform Judaism board. Mutilate your penis.

Read up on them then, end of the day we're all Brothers and Sisters in Christ, but the different denominations vary quite a bit and if you haven't noticed yet we fling shit at each other from time to time too, especially on Jow Forums. I'd give you my definitions, but others probably wouldn't agree and I don't want to start a shitstorm if you're genuinely serious about this.

THE APOSTLE PAUL SAID THAT CIRCUMCISION IS NOT REQUIRED OF CHRISTIANS
DO NOT BELIEVE JEW LIES
youtube.com/watch?v=vmx4UjRFp0M Watch 3 min

And yea, rabbi Yeshua hath blessed me with these sick digits to spread His holy message, "Give us thine foreskins goyim."

Better read Philip schaff's Christian history

Read the king james bible new testament , follow jesus teachings and congratz you are a christian

The Holy Prepuce, or Holy Foreskin (Latin præputium or prepucium), is one of several relics attributed to Jesus, a product of the circumcision of Jesus. At various points in history, a number of churches in Europe have claimed to possess Jesus' foreskin, sometimes at the same time. Various miraculous powers have been ascribed to it.
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Prepuce

Catholic (Good, righteous and true):
Roman: Oldest Church, best system but bad pope ATM
Orthodox: For Slavaboos, more mystically minded than the rational Catholics, speak Greek instead of Latin

NOTE THAT, ALTHOUGH THEY DISTRUST EACH OTHER, CATHOLICS AND ORTHODOX ACCEPT EACH OTHER'S SACRAMENTS AND CONSIDER EACH OTHER TRUE, SO WHICH ONE YOU JOIN DOESN'T MATTER TOO MUCH FROM A THEOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE.

Protestants (Extra heretical):
Lutheran: Originally created by a literal madman (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrupulosity) but has so many offshoots now that it can't really be described in such a short post. Usually, they're pretty leftist in Europe and can be pretty hardcore rightist in the US - again, a very heterogenous group.

Anglican: Depending on whom you ask, got created by King Henry VII so he could divorce, or to push back Roman influence over Britain. Very leftist.

If you want the real thing I'd say Roman Catholic, but the Orthodox are really good too.

I'd recommend what said. Ultimately it's your choice. Keep searching for the truth user.

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THE APOSTLE PAUL, A CLOSE FRIEND OF JESUS, SAID THAT CIRCUMCISION WAS NOT NECESSARY FOR CHRISTIANITY. U STOLE THE TIP OF MY DICK U DIRTY JEWS

Read Romans, the Gospels, read about the Talmud Christ spoke against and was killed for, then Read Mein Kampf and the Protocols of Zion.

Go with the original Church.

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Now you look a little more like Jesus.
Yum yum scrumptious dickskins.

Suffer a head injury. Rinse and repeat.

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>remove brain
>believe in fairy tales
That's it. You'd need to talk with a priest to officialise it and you're a christian

Explain how Poland benefited from being catholic.

Did it prevent:

- partitions
- WWII
- poverty
- Polish jokes
- general cluelessness
- et all

oy vey because smart people never are religious

WHITE PEOPLE!

LISTEN UP!

Your true religion and culture is preserved in India. You and I both know how much mental gymnastics is needed to even justify self-defense in Christianity. Here are some quotes from the Bhagawad Gita to give you spiritual strength:-

1) Yield not to unmanliness, O Arjuna, it does not become you. Shake off this base faint-heartedness and arise, O scorcher of foes!

2) Considering also your own duty, it does not befit you to waver. For, to a Kshatriya, there is no greater good than a righteous war.

3) Happy are the Kshatriyas, O Arjuna, to whom a war like this comes of its own accord; it opens the gate to heaven.

4) But if you do not fight this righteous war, you will be turning away from your duty and honored position, and will be incurring sin.
If slain, you shall win heaven; or if victorious, you shall enjoy the earth. Therefore, arise, O Arjuna, resolved to fight.

COME HOME ARYAN WARRIOR.

gita4free.com/downloads/

(Kshatriya means warrior. And consider yourself in the place of Arjuna.)

>ALTHOUGH THEY DISTRUST EACH OTHER, CATHOLICS AND ORTHODOX ACCEPT EACH OTHER'S SACRAMENTS AND CONSIDER EACH OTHER TRUE, SO WHICH ONE YOU JOIN DOESN'T MATTER TOO MUCH FROM A THEOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE.
Why would you lie like that the Orthodox absolutely do not accept the validity of Catholic Sacraments. The Catholics accept Orthodox ones though.

READ THIS IN ITS ENTIRETY

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>partitions
You can blame szlachta for that.
>WWII
It held us together through our darkest time and right after WWII the Roman Catholic church was the biggest opponent of communism when we got occupied by Russians.
>poverty
Plenty of charities around, the majority of which are, in fact, Christian.
>Polish jokes
U wut m8? Grow a thicker skin, you're on Jow Forums.
>general cluelessness
Self-hating Pole, eh? Is ok fren, that too shall pass.

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You've already done the important part. The rest of it is just ceremony.

READ THIS. COME HOME.

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There is no reason to go to a church, and you should detach yourself the religious mainstream and not partake in their fornication.

Real christians do not believe in a trinity, real christians do not celebrate pagan festivals or take part in paganism. Read the KJV, and pray to the LORD for the truth.

youtu.be/4h53opvBTrw?list=PLIdrpmOyYyTvrwJ_wKM3nO3m5pkn5Vcxs

Go to an Orthodox church, the Catholics have the most retarded Pope right now.

>polish jokes
oy kurwa anudda invasion

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Go straight to a latian or Byzantine church and set up a meeting with the preist. They will set you up with their parish convert office. You have to test me on this. If not.me than the saints before us. Look into yiur local area for the specific latian rite. If you're in a state that has a big city than look online at the oldest churches and typically they still.practice the latian rite.

Here.
Start watching thus channel. It's going to make your life so much easier in understanding Catholicism and Christianity if you watch them as well as finding seriously redpilled preists.

youtube.com/user/onearmsteve4192

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>real christians don't believe in the trinity
get the fuck out of here you oneness heretic

>orthodoxy
Pagan eastern breathing worship denying the Trinity through "uncreated energies".
It's not coincidence orthodoxy was banned before the fall of Constantinople.
youtu.be/d07mgLoOW8g

If you decide to go for Catholicism
look up the Nostra Aetate
but I trust that Catholics will uncuck themselves

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if it's between the kikes and the poos
I'd probably choose the kikes, honestly

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HINDUISM

1. Knew earth wasn't flat thousands of years before anyone else.

Proof:

The Sun does never set nor rise. When people think the Sun is setting it is not so. For after having arrived at the end of the day it makes itself produce two opposite effects, making night to what is below and day to what is on the other side having reached the end of the night, it makes itself produce two opposite effects, making day to what is below and night to what is on the other side. In fact, the Sun never sets. - Aitareya Brahmana (3.44)

Shape of Earth is like an Oblate Spheroid. - Rig Veda XXX. IV.V

Earth is flattened at the poles Markandeya Purana 54.12

2. Supports Evoultion

Proof: youtube.com/watch?v=L0X4dM1ve4g

3. Developed Yoga, Meditation, Ayurveda, etc all of which have been scientifically proven to be beneficial

Attached: Carl Sagan.png (700x700, 92K)

You need to read this mate

You've just converted, congratulations.

Read it, stop shitting in streets yhwh will forgive you

I'm Roman Catholic, but I'll have to disagree, the Orthodox church is NOT pagan.

>denying the Trinity
This is bait, isn't it?

Someone needs to shut this poojeet

I did in the past, you like spamming it everywhere. I can respect your faith, but it's not my cup of tea personally. And since OP is looking to convert to Christianity, you're doing him a disservice right now.

Hindus are pretty based when it comes to dealing with mudslimes.

I can easily post pictures of high IQ white Americans shitting their pants in malls and in San Francisco. Do I want to do that? No. My people are poor and illiterate. Your people have the best life on earth and still you do it. So, be mature and just accept that there are problems in every culture.

LOL you afraid of the Truth mate?

You sure you're not thinking about the Sikh mate?

>this religion was right about some non-religious facts
I mean it's not like I'm basing this on any disregard for hinduism, rather on my disdain for your shitcunt countrymen
if it weren't for the fact every Indian I've met is lazier than niggers, smells like shit 90% of the time, treats you like shit if you aren't Indian (to the point of denying service), and doesn't bother to learn to speak anything even vaguely resembling English, I'd probably be more kindly towards this merger
since that isn't the case however, fuck off and die, at least the kikes know how to bathe

Yes I am. Look up the BJP.

I am giving him an alternative. You did not read this . I don't want OP to be meek. I respect Lord Jesus and consider him a divine figure but "Duty" should be held higher than "Peace" and "Tolerance". I studied in a Christian school myself and sincerely sang prayer songs every day.

Thank you.

I wouldn't really classify referring to Christianity as mental gymnastic as being super respectful towards Jesus.

Those are religious scriptures. But let me settle everything once and for all. I will leave things to your intellect. Check this out -

Abrahamic religions (AR): Only I hold the key to heaven. If you are not on my team, you are going to hell. Anyone who does not worship my God is doomed. The source of all conflicts.
Dharmic religions (DR): You get to heaven depending on your actions. Very few or almost no religious conflicts. Peaceful co-existence.

AR: Those who don't follow my God will suffer in eternal hellfire BUT, my god is loving and just. Only problem is that my God won't give you second chances.
DR: You will suffer if you do wrong. There is no eternal hellfire. If you don't pay the price for your sins on earth, you will pay it in the next life. God loves you and gives you second chances.

AR: All other religions are false
DR: No matter whom you worship, only your intention, sincerity and devotion is what God sees. All paths lead to the same God.

Christianity: You are a sinner by birth. Even a baby is evil until the baby accepts Jesus.
Dharmic religions: You are divine by birth. But as you get older and get more involved in the world, your mind gets polluted with money, lust, sex, greed, anger, etc. You have to detach from those and connect with God. (Best way is through prayer, chanting, and singing)

AR: God sits in the sky with CCTV cameras
DR: God is in every single atom of the universe. There are two parts to God. This physical realm in which we reside and the spiritual realm in which God resides. But both realms are part of God himself. God knows the past, present, and future of everything.

AR: You get good points for converting people
DR: You get good points for doing good deeds or helping people become good people

AR: Focused on converting people instead of connecting to God
DR: Focused on connecting to God through songs and meditation instead of converting people

AR: Goal of life is to enter heaven (sometimes has 72 virgins)
DR: Goal of life is to break the cycle of rebirth to become one with God. This world is a test. You have to detach from this material life.

Sorry I hurt your religious sentiments. But seriously, do you not have to dig deep and create meaning out of things to justify self-defense?

Nothing. Accepting Jesus Christ as your savior is enough. Let the holy ghost fill you with infinite positivity.

reading comprehension an American Negro would be ashamed of, just as I've come to expect of your blighted educational system

Don't cheat yourself. Go Orthodox. Ask God.

How many good points do you get for gang rape?

>You get to heaven depending on your actions
>God knows the past, present, and future of everything.
These two contradict each other.

God gives us free will, that doesn't mean he cannot predict what we will do.

Amen.

Please help me out with my English high IQ better educated Aussie mate. I request you to make it better so that people who read it in the future don't have any complaints about my writing skills.

>Why would you lie like that the Orthodox absolutely do not accept the validity of Catholic Sacraments.
Except they do. If you're protestant, you're SOL tho.

you get your false idol worshipping ass out of here. Fuck mary and the saints its all about the Trinity you scum

Atheists have literally 50% brain activity in comparison to christians.

>Before Christianity
>No Jews in Europe
Yeah, that's wrong. Jews were a privileged class in pagan Rome.

God in Hinduism is considered to be so powerful that even though everything is happening in real time, he knows all alternative futures simultaneously based on every single choice you can possibly make. Tell me if you did not get this. I'll explain more.

Cry more.

Also, the Hindoo here is probably KKJ_Rajputana, that schizo tripfrag from the other Jow Forums back in the day, who's convinced that Christianity gives energy to reptoid aliens.

Wasn't there a conflict where they destroyed their temples?

Yeah a privileged class who got their homeland smashed and named after their enemies

How is this different from the Christian God?

No. I am not him. Whoever that was is an idiot.

For apologetics, read Screwtape Letters and Mere Christianity by CS Lewis, then Orthodoxy by GK Chesterton. Or read The Brothers Karamazov if you want a great story with lots of religious basis.

Read the rest of the points. There are a lot of differences

Catholicism isn't Christianity.
Christ would never agree to such a hierarchy of power or its pantheistic nature.
Catholicism is satanic.

And here I thought you were decent for a second. Shame.

>How do I convert to Christianity?
You sit on a buttplug and masturbate to Jew Jesus.

CHRISTIANS = HOMOSEXUAL:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_DSM
>1973[6] – On 15 October the Australian and New Zealand College of Psychiatry Federal Council declares homosexuality not an illness – the first such body in the world to do so; in December the American Psychiatric Association removes homosexuality from its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders

Guy who legalized gays:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Nixon
>was the 37th President of the United States, serving from 1969 until 1974
>Political party Republican
>leading anti-communist

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage_in_the_United_States
>U.S. wedding would take place in a religious building such as a church

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Same-sex_marriage
>religious ceremony

Jesus was a Lama. The three wise men were there to find him and test him. The gap in the story of his life is from when he was in the east somewhere, learning about Buddhism.

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Hey man, don't insult Christ.

A lot of this came from the libraries of Byzantines when they fell. It's Neoplatonism. The Christkikes hadn't managed to wipe out pre-Christian history like they tried and once Byzantine fell the world became flooded with old pagan works that dragged Christian Europe out of the dark ages and sparked the Renaissance. Christians will deny this up and down but its pure objective fact.

Plausible theory.

Find Orthodox or Trad Catholic parish. Attend bible study. Get baptized.

See a catholic priest, FSSPX if available and ask him to introduce you to the true path.
(((King James)))

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Ganesha poos on Jesus.

There is a reason why infinity is a Greek invention and Zero is an Indian one.
You figure that one out.

>American education
Jews were a privileged class in Rome, very rich and influential. This only changed when Christianity became stronger.

Anyway, jews tdid revolutions all the time, never losing their privileges. Even after Christianity, the non-Christian pagans preferred them a lot:
>Julian, the only emperor to reject Christianity after the conversion of Constantine, allowed the Jews to return to "holy Jerusalem which you have for many years longed to see rebuilt" and to rebuild the Temple. However Julian was killed in battle on 26 June 363 in his failed campaign against the Sassanid Empire, and the Third Temple was not rebuilt at that time.

And afterwards:
>The Jews in the diaspora were generally accepted into the Roman Empire, but with the rise of Christianity, restrictions grew. Forced expulsions and persecution resulted in substantial shifts in the international centers of Jewish life to which far-flung communities often looked, although not always unified, due to the Jewish people's dispersion itself.

tl;dr: Pagans love Jews, Christians hate Jews.

And again, American education.

hu, hu, hu,
erogenous

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Pray to the Virgin Mary user, all the saints and doctor's of the church have had devotion to Her since the time of Christ, She is very very real and never let's you down
>www.salvemariaregina.info

You're a stupid faggot. Why are Christkikes such giant liars? Is it because you're Jewish LARPers?

Neoplatonism ostensibly survived in the Eastern Christian Church as an independent tradition and was reintroduced to the West by Pletho (c.1355 – 1452/1454), an avowed pagan and opponent of the Byzantine Church, inasmuch as the latter, under Western scholastic influence, relied heavily upon Aristotelian methodology. Plethon's Platonic revival, following the Council of Florence (1438–1439), largely accounts for the renewed interest in Platonic philosophy which accompanied the Renaissance.

"Of all the students of Greek in Renaissance Italy, the best-known are the Neoplatonists who studied in and around Florence" (Hole). Neoplatonism was not just a revival of Plato's ideas, it is all based on Plotinus' created synthesis, which incorporated the works and teachings of Plato, Aristotle, Pythagoras, and other Greek philosophers. The Renaissance in Italy was the revival of classic antiquity, and this started at the fall of the Byzantine empire, who were considered the "librarians of the world", because of their great collection of classical manuscripts and the number of humanist scholars that resided in Constantinople (Hole).

Neoplatonism in the Renaissance combined the ideas of Christianity and a new awareness of the writings of Plato.

What did Christians do? Let's ask John Chrysostom.
"Pythagoras and of Plato, which seemed before to prevail, have
ceased to be spoken of, and most men do not know them even by
name. Yet Plato was, they say, the invited companion of kings, had
many friends, and sailed to Sicily. And Pythagoras occupied Magna
Graecia, and practiced there ten thousand kinds of sorcery. For to
converse with oxen, (which they say he did,) was nothing else but a
piece of sorcery. As is most clear from this. He that so conversed
with brutes did not in anything benefit the race of men, but even did
them the greatest wrong. "

Kill yourself

The Pentateuch wasn't written till the 3rd century BC, idiot

First of all, you should decide, wheter you believe in the one God. If you do believe in Him, you should reject the heretic notion of sons, holy ghosts and whatever. The fist two comandments, the only two commandments written directly by God Himself, state, "I'm the Lord, your God" and "You shall not worship other Gods beside me".

Follow these and the other commandments, and you'll have a place in the world after.

Optionally, if you feel like really in this thing, you can convert to Judaism or Islam. Both have their merits, but they are just traditions, the only thing, that really matters is the belief in the One True God.

Bullshit. My true religion and culture is preserved in seafaring