It is really cruel in my mind that we born here with no knowledge or memory about what life is & then we should just play with it and create own shit that people call as life. We are basically rats in a maze. Only thing worth to use this time in my mind, is by seeking truth. Seeking answers to fundamental questions of life.
All these years of studying & studying but only thing we get is possibilities. Only way to know is by experience.
So dmt & meditation? The pain of ignorance is growing slowly and at times it has been so great that I've fantasized about suicide, in couple seconds i would know everything(possibly).
It's not that i would be unhappy, no no i understand life enough so i realize that only thing between bliss, happiness and you is our own bullshit that we create. Life is most beautiful thing i know. I care not about that, i don't have to seek happines. I seek answers.
I found it really absurd that people just start doing own shit and does not stop to think what all this is.
Positive thing is that one day i will die and then i might know.
There is always desire to be something more within human. Usually it manifest itself trough materialistic ways, sexual ways, trough drugs or parenthood example. It is endless chasing, rat-race that leads nowhere but keeps you busy trough own creation that people calls as life.
We can't remember our time as toddlers because we didn't exist in that time. We had no identity. Only when years has gone while we gathered data from our environment we created identity. When we have our identity, we decide what matters to us. Then we experience impulsive feelings when things didn't go as we wanted.
We are piece of life that creates own image and plays it (Genesis 1:27 So God created man in His own image). We get so tangled to our own creation that it can kill us and bring us into hell. We think that something or someone causes our misery even when we alone create everything within.
We have all this mysterious desire to do something, be something more. It usually manifest itself trough sexual ways, materialistic ways, trough parenthood, dating, drugs, games, food, alcohol.. you name it. Trough that it leads nowhere, it keeps us happy for a moment and then we need more. So where we are now? We are piece of life that want to experience bigger part of it. Trough physical ways it finds not that part and when that need to expand finds no expression we create this pain within. So what to do? This is what meditation is all about. We wan't to think nothing, be nothing because that is just the data we gathered from the physical and created self from it. When we learn to be still, just be as piece of life, something start to happen that seems to expand you into everywhere. It seems to that consciousness, awareness is the basic that exist and everything else is manifest of it.
What ((they)) wan't is to bind us more and more into physical, sins, into that rat-race i wrote about above, so that we wouldn't learn or even think about this.
Austin Rivera
The worst is right as I wake up. I haven't even opened my eyes but I can feel the crust in them. A loud repetitive sound usually causes me to stir, my family doing laundry or mowing the lawn, neighbors testing a car engine, a barking dog... My back is sore but oh who cares nobody ever listened to that "excuse" before. My knee doesn't fare much better, but at least I can remember doing the injury. Before I even open my eyes I am suffering physical and emotional pain. Eventually the smell of my bedroom (and thirst) draws me up. I blow my nose on whatever furniture or cloth is around then walk to the fridge for my first beer. Maybe I will drink two or three of a sixpack before I vomit, and save the rest for in the shower. By then the shower water is cold and all my crusted tears are washed away. I look at my body unimpressed. If only someone who cared lived in here. Don't care. If my actions kill it faster maybe I can escape. I usually start shiverring while I dry myself. A home should never be this cold. It makes me feel ashamed and reminds me of childhood punishments. Then I go back to bed for a while to chain smoke and stare at my facebook wall. I would type so much into that thing some days, but always delete it. Sometimes it's racist, sometimes it's sexist, but it's always criticism. People don't like criticism because it gives them a chance to improve. When I was 8 years old I used to watch cars pass and think about how easy it would be to pop my head under their tires. Trucks were even more exciting, and cliffs, poisons, anything really that gave me comfort to believe I was 5 minutes away from a peaceful silence. So after my "morning" it's usually dark outside. I walk into the shed and open the beer fridge without even turning on the lights. If the fire is on I wont drink it in bed. I will stay in this position for maybe ten hours, staring into a void of self-pity. Sometimes I draw or make origami. I always burn them and get drunk... Then I wake up.
The creator is dead. We are just running the algorithms left behind, it will be millions of years before we really find any significance... But its more likely that our species will be destroyed before reaching any sort of real truth.. As countless species before us have
Brandon Thomas
>i don't have to seek happines. I seek answers. Ha, what has truth ever done for me? The matrix gives me a network and people. The truth doesn't do anything but make sad that I keep hearing the opposite of what I know to be absolute truth every day. I could form a group of like minded people but that doesn't go anywhere. Everyone just wants to meme and laugh, and we don't have the power to take out an institution.
Eli Wood
>I found it really absurd that people just start doing own shit and does not stop to think what all this is. Not only do people not think, they get irrational if you attempt to draw attention to this question. Sometimes I feel all alone out here.
Hudson Sanchez
Good read
Hunter Rogers
ay lmaos call us containers.
Adam Foster
................................truth does not make you sad, you do. You seem to care about matrix, i was talking about caring about truth. To what you need this group? I dont understand anything you just said
Juan King
Would you really want to know the absolute truth to everything? All the mystery gone? Not having anything left to do or strive for anymore? What if you did k ow all truths? How can you possibly think that would end your "suffering"?
Justin Cook
I design advanced machine-learning models. The brain starts empty so it is flexible enough to do and be ANYTHING. You're nothing special... because that's what you've used your sole life for. Well done. Some of us did something else...
Jonathan Kelly
i bet we are just a "containers". Little algorithms that gives data to source, god.
But based to my studies i don't think this is normal situation in universe. I think beings have usually some sense of what this is all about. This might be just a bullshit, idk. Idk anything and that is what is killing me.
I think infinity is always expanding and tho you can't never know everything. I think we, and our universe is just flyshit part of creation. Ofc i would want to know why i did born.
Ethan Robinson
Why do you want knowledge? All it means is you will have less in common with the people around you because you're immune to most of the propaganda unlike them. Then you have to larp because every archetype in their headspace they could put you under is a fake construct designed by malevolent institutions. Redpilling people one at a time is possible, but not feasible unless you're in a small group.
Robert Ross
>muh defeatism >muh nihilism
John Williams
i care not being "special". I as i know now is just 24years of data and happenings shaped as self, material. I think when we die we meet our souls, or higher selfs and depending our density, level of awareness, we assimilate to higher self. idk this is just one possibility. We basically just become flyshit part of true self. One little little happening in it
Ryan Foster
Ah, another man that realizes the truth, Good. All i have to tell you, and others now is "The truth will set you free"
Brandon Parker
you are really into matrix arent you? I don't like to identify much to things that i will lose anyway when i die. I care not those things you talk about
idk about truth, i know possibilities. I know it when i experience it. I've experienced BIG things in meditation but still it can be product of my brain. Maybe some day..
Jacob Kelly
idk about truth, i know possibilities. I know it when i experience it. I've experienced BIG things in meditation but still it can be product of my brain. Maybe some day.. atleast when i die
Blake Walker
I always felt the same way. Like each species has their own Roman Catholic High Priest. Imagine little birds, squirrels, and whatnot with crowns made of thorns.
