Has anyone on Jow Forums been to jail before?

>they had progressed to smoking "crack" my second time there, which is when they would crack open the e cigs and smoke the cotton from inside, along with some plastic fumes which smelled fucking awful.
kek

Like...this crap simply has to be professional, right? No one who actually thought like this would be able to keep his shit together long enough to open photoshop. He'd be too busy making giant conspiracy diagrams on corkboard with string and newspaper clippings in his basement or drawing on the walls with his own feces. How can actual professional shills be *this* bad at propaganda?

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Stupid people go to jail.

Anders?

I spent two week in jail for trying to suicide by cop. I got mostly weapons charges. Got let off because I had a history of mental health issues. I even got my own newspaper page. Would never do it again desu.

Norwegian jails aren't that bad.
I had to spend 14 days in jail for carrying a knife (I didn't have a license, lol) in public during a street fight.

Other than that I have only spent a few hours in isolation after being arrested for being drunk in public, but were released after sobering up.

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Yep, credit card fraud, drug possession, and firearm ownership.

Was not that terrible, was about the only european person with like 5 others out of 100, food was quite ok. Biggest problem was boredom more than anything

There was also a legitimately crazy motherfucker, pretty nonviolent though, some fuckhead who "told the future" with playing cards, everyone was too retarded to know any card games other than slap jack, and apparently the month before I went in for my second stint, they all got really methed out and went nuts, so there was no TV and previously they hadn't been allowed phone calls as well during lock down, but some dumbass broke the phone so it didn't work anyways when I was in there for like half the time.

The food is absolutely atrocious, way worse than anything I was ever served in school, which is why I always laugh when people in videos say school food looks like prison food. The thing I missed the most, both times, was fruit.

Boring as fuck.
if you want some idea of what prison is like, sit in your bathroom for an entire day with the door closed.

But my bathroom has a jacuzzi tub, a tv, a bidet toilet seat, internet access, heated floors, and a mini bar

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Worst part was being deprived of sunlight indoors for 2 months, no windows. Food sucked, niggers sucked, but that was the worst in my opinion.

Did your jail have a shop where u could get tv and powerboard and shit?

This, niggers are far worse than being locked inside a building.

both? your lawyer must have sucked ass

Strangely in a majority asian area still most of the inmates are black.

Hotplate hotwater heater minifridge and that's as much space as a human being needs. -Private for profit Prison System-

How'd you do credit card fraud?

That looks more like a fucking dorm room, jesus y'all have it easy.

I spent some time in LA county jail when I was a youth. It's not fun but if you're not an idiot and white you can manage to stay out of trouble. I was in for around 3 months.

I was in for 30 days after a few DUIs and some old faggot from Chicago asked me to borrow $5 for commissary right when I got in. I was stupid and let him use my card. He spent the money on Mike and Ikes and called them "chewie chewies". When I realized he didn't plan on paying me back a week or so later, I mercilessly mocked his Chicago retard lisp and demanded payment for the chewie chewies in front of everyone. He attacked me in my cell and I smashed his head into the wall and claimed self defense. I also flexed on some albino faggot when he was talking too loud on movie night during Pirates of the Caribbean.

You feel like a caged animal and it's really boring. Some places you have to sleep on the concrete. The food sucks.

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Yes, a retard that shot up people and made us look like killers.

I went to jail because I was drunk and disorderly. Cops caught up to me sprinting down the street at 3am wearing a halloween mask and carrying a duffel bag. I was going home from my friends house and thought running would get me there faster since I was drunk and wouldn't feel as tired. The duffel bag was empty except for half a bag of potato chips my friend gave me as rations for the trip home.

Took two officers to get me in the car, one pushing and the other crawled into the passenger side and was pulling on my belt because I'm a big boy. Went to the police station where I spent the next 2 hours waiting for the jail transport handcuffed to a table, while I slammed my cuffs on the table over and over again screaming "I'M HENRY THE EIGHTH I AM" etc. I headbutted another prisoner unconscious on the transport bus, nobody cared. They took my belt and shoelaces and threw me in a cell with the other drunkies. I was having fun because we were all pretty hammered, we were just laughing at the situation. One big spanish dude who was passed out randomly woke up, walked over to the sink/toilet combo and threw up into the sink part (?). Was fun until the booze wore off, then I just really wanted to go home. Ate a sandwich with half inch thick bologna on it and some warm cartons of milk. They wouldn't give us water for some reason.

My last name starts with a V so I was the last person to get called into court the next morning. While sitting in line on the bench in court I was handcuffed behind my back waiting my turn, and my nose got itchy. I kept trying to scratch it with my knee, but the bailiff closest to me kept telling me to stop moving and keep my eyes on the judge. So while trying to do this, lifting my leg and putting it down every time the bailiff looked over and over, my fly managed to open itself. I was called up and my dick was clearly visible, though still inside my pants.

Somehow since it was my first offence I only got fined and let out.

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Yeah bruh, only cool guys go to jail.

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Damn, usually you only have to sleep on concrete if you piss off the prison guards. The food is not bad too in Canadian prisons.

I technically "floor slept" for one of my nights in LACJ, I was never compensated.

It's lame, the worst part is people who expect to be there or act like it's cool. It's not fucking cool. It means you're a goddamned loser, fuck-up, scumbag, criminal. It's not something to be proud of. I'm not pleased with myself that I spent two weeks in jail, which isn't even enough to be called "Time," and still makes you feel completely worthless afterwards. You do that and you will not only reconsider your entire life and where it all went wrong, why you're such an idiot, you will also despair the future to the point of hopelessness, that there is nothing to look forward to, you had nothing in your life already and then you went to jail. People say there's nowhere to go but up? More like further down, it will only get worse. Not drug addict, arsonist, murderer worse, just poor, broke, alone, working dead-end jobs 50 hours a week the rest of your life for no insurance, no pension, can't afford a car, can't get drunk since it might lead to trouble, slowly deteriorating, watching your life disintegrate into nothing, no family, no friends, no girlfriend, all you have is death. That's what jail, prison, confinement feels like.

You must be a hoot at parties

it's pretty comfy

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My cousin went to jail and he said the prisoners took his shoes from him and if you refuse to give them your shoes they kick your ass.

Using anyone's debit card is credit card fraud in United States, if done without cardholders permission

I spent two weeks in jail as part of a plea deal for stealing a $million.

It was like high school. Fairly chill, just bs'ing with a bunch of dudes. My housing unit was for non-violent people, so no assaults/rapes/pedo bullshit mostly dudes there waiting hearing on probation/parole violations, drugs, house breakins, etc. I'm just a clean cut white guy with an MBA. I was far from the only white guy there, but a lot of people told me I didn't seem like I belonged there.

I guess I didn't. Was supposed to stay 6 months in county jail per plea agreement, they kicked me out to house arrest after two weeks and then released me from that 4 months later for good behavior credits, been serving out a 5 year probation since.

I spent one night in jail.

There was a little time for basketball, and a nigger asked for my breakfast and was mad when I only offered him the one thing I didn't eat.

Even though it was just a single night in county, everyone could tell I didn't belong and they singled me out. I was even nice to a junkie who was going through withdrawals and people were like "don't do that"

>stealing a $million.
More on this?

To be fair it's mainly when you're just in there for the night. Whenever i spent a couple days i was given a bed. Yeah i can eat it, not sure what they did to Tommy there in the UK. Can't believe how much weight he lost.

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One planned, one collateral?

I didn't steal a $million. Like I really didn't. They claimed I did, but couldn't prove it. There were some other fraud charges that they could have nailed me on anyway, so finally they offered a plead deal where they dropped the legit but I had to agree I stole the $million.

It made me laugh a couple weeks ago when the libs jumped on Cohen pleading guilty to campaign finance charges. It was a bunch of bullshit, it's the same old tactic they always use. Activist trump hating prosecutors knew they had Cohen bent over a barrel with 10+ years of tax fraud charges, but they wouldn't have won on the campaign finance charges because Cohen would have said it was done for personal reasons not campaign reason, so in the plea they made him agree he did it to aid the campaign instead of his friend and in exchange they offerred him 4-6 years on the tax charges they would gonna definitely win on. Then the libs get to sing that the campaign was corrupt. It's all pretty fucked up.

It smells like ass on a constant basis. Everywhere, it just smells like a sweaty butthole

Like a trip to the zoo.

user do you thing a nigger in jail knows or cares about that? He just wanted some candy.

Spent 2 hours in cell while waiting for interegation. One bitch accused me of rape. But prosecutor dismissed charges on me.

Which prison