What became of this fucking country Jow Forums? How does my life stoop so low to the point that living is like a cheesy purgatorial TV show?
>Be me
>Junior detective for a PD of a decaying town in a small county.
>county pop. is small but crime is getting rampant and PD is extremely underfunded
>It's so underfunded that I (an investigatory specialist that corresponds to higher authority) have to go on patrols with rookies
>Despite being underfunded the department was committed to the PC-diversity bullshit
>Nearly two-thirds of all personnel are now women and dumb college kids.
>Patrol shift clocks in.
>Number of patrol vehicles are limited so sometimes we have to patrol in a disguised Ford F250 panel van.
>The van also happens to be the only vehicle of the operating K9 unit.
>Meet my misfit partners for the patrol.
>A ginger thot who totally wants to fuck me. Always calls me for code 3 on everything, never made a single arrest. Useless
>Second is also a woman, fast on the computer but incredibly unfit for field work. Always a klutz and has poor eye sight.
>Since the van belongs to the K9, the dog and the K9 officer also has to accompany us.
>K9 officer is a fucking pothead. I swear the guy comes to work high (can't prove it but discretely smells like weed).
>He's incredibly unfit and lanky but somehow he's the only "qualified" K9 officer.
>The K9 dog is a Great Dane breed but its absolutely stupid like his partner and is very poorly disciplined.
>Dog won't sniff out shit unless he's given half a box of fucking treats and gets scared when there's a 10-57 (pursuit of suspect)
>Officer basedpot always carries around a box load of biscuits for the Dane
>Officer basedpot himself also eats the dog treat like hes craving the munchies.
>I work with these useless degenerates with guns everyday.
>All five of us (the dog included) drive around in this small-ass van.
>I do this almost everyday of my life...
...and I wonder if I'll ever solve to escape out of this Mystery.