>Not joining the FBI
Why aren't you joining the most glorious organization to ever exist?
Did you know they have a shortage on the field of technology? So yes we could use some computer experts.
If I was an American I would join in a second! Just send them an email detailing some basic personal information and they will contact you!
Serve your country anons!
FBI = Famous But Incompetent
Maybe 50 years ago. They're more pozzed than john oliver's asshole these days
>couldn't charge shillary
>was warned about parkland didn't do jack shit
they are fucking useless
Send them email
Get an email with malicious hidden code in the headers back....
>why aren't you guys lining up to join the most corrupt police force in the entire world?
>Working for anti american faglords
I mean, if I enjoyed looking up my own ass for fake and gay shit, then i’d gladly come work for them.
Atleast glowniggers do something, but the fbi just pulls out their dicks and steps on them.
The organization that pushes schizos to commit terrorism so they can arrest them in order to appear they're doing something instead of doing actual police work? They're just one step above the actual glow in the dark niggers
they are worse than glow niggers. at least they put their lives on the line
Lel, my uncle is in the FBI and it's very competitive. You need to speak 3 languages just to be a civilian analyst let alone a field agent with service weapon.
Also you need to be pot free for 3 years to even handle mail so that disqualifies most of you degenerates
If there's any FBI anons or Glow in the Dark niggers who want to hire a UK user as part of their cryptology department; I make really good coffee and give lunchtime handjobs nohomo.
Help a UK user out. It's either you are Russia.
"Why aren't you joining the most glorious organization to ever exist? "
I dont know how to do a back flip without my gun going off.
Do they have an opening at the /x/-files?
I also require a qt tsundere sidekick.
>If there are
>or
Excuse the spelling and grammatical errors on my CV. I'm in a rush to be employed. Wink wink.
I wouldn't mind a handjob from you.
No one on this board would be able to pass a polygraph test.
Jobs before handjobs.
I don't want to be unemployed and offering sexual favours, else I'd be a common prostitute.
Should have gotten me out of college instead of recruiting me and putting down infinite red tape, now i'm exactly the person you want, except I have no interest in you and will make more and can smoke weed.
Just call it "freelance hands-on consulting". All consultants are basically whores anyway.
>So yes we could use some computer experts.
>If I was an American I would join in a second!
You must be pretty new, agent. Tell the boys in the breakroom I say hello. I would join if you guys got your shit together and purged the Comey-types.
none of us want join the gay boyscouts
Anyone can learn to fool a polygraph.
>Why aren't you joining
>they have a shortage on the field of technology? So yes we could use some computer experts.
Smart people that are actually good with technology don't want the Internet to be censored and observed by the government. Spying and censoring is bad, m'kay, officer?
>If I was an American I would join in a second!
Mostly foreigners join FBI. American citizens are kind of feeling guilty for spying on and jailing their fellow countrymen over retarded laws that they never voted for.
>Serve your country anons!
The best way to serve your country is to announce that FBI, along with russian FSB and similar organizations around the world, are the enemies of the people, and start prosecuting them for their crimes against humanity. Death sentence would be the best kind of punishment.
>being on the GS scale in Maryland/Virginia.
Does your uncle enjoy being poor?
>stop spying on me
>t. sputnik
I'm trying to get a drone pilot slot in the airforce and then transfer to the CIA after a few years of experience.
Started in accounting. Most fbi want accounting majors. Basically want you to be a virgin before joining and making $65k a year. No thanks. Became a consultant instead.
>implying that isn't the RCMP
I'm not an FBI agent.
So basically I'm a whore???
Say goodbye to any chance of a handjobs you ever had from me. Nohomo
I work for them on Jow Forums
>2007-2009
>Everyone making fun of the poor FBI agents sent to the basement where careers go to die, and they had to monitor /b/ for CP. Every FBI agent trying to stay the fuck away
>2018
>Former /b/ agents are now the tip of the spear when it comes to monitoring Jow Forums and its geopolitical influence. Every agent trying to get in
You know who you are. You're just like the CIAs Iraq unit. Before 2003 that's where they sent all the dead weight, and after 2003 the dead weight turned into the agencies superheroes.
No worries, I'm self-employed in that department buddy.
Your troll fu is really quite pathetic.
FBI is the useless one, right?
No thanks. I've got another mission and I'm not sure its compatible with being a yes man fed.
>Look at me
>I am the FBI now
Want a good FBI story?
>my grandpa put Frank Rosenthal on TV when lefty lost his gaming license
>one day at the country club, my grandpas leaving Franks house, Spilatro walks on in.
>FBI surveillance plane circling the country club runs out of fuel.
4 FBI Niggers land the plane on one of the fairways and run away in jacket and tie.
>rosenthal laughs watching them run away behind his house.
Portrayed in Casino even. They were incompetent in the late 70s, but I wouldnt fuck with them today just in case.
>pass a hair follicle test
heh
what do they actually do besides create terrorists that they then "save" everyone from
>superheroes.
supercucks*
Launder money for true CIA.
I'm pretty sure the low level guys are good people, investigating murders and such. It's the top level admin CFR members that are gatekeepers to protect the politicians and their crimes to further their globalist agenda.
I assume they mostly deal with leads on interstate fugitives, high profile cases, general security, infilitration of international drug/revolutionist/black market, honeypots, continued prankwar and pissing contest between NSA/CIA/DOI/IC, dickwaging to congress, and the legal/field/assistant teams relevant to each, I think they're mostly looking at nudes we send to each other.
They only take mormons , spics, and nigggers.
Help the Democrats I believe. For 2 years now they've been quite traitorous and have been constantly attacking and hampering the presidency. But they haven't done shit about Hillary and Benghazi.
That would be a giant downgrade for me. We make fun of them in office.
Inb4 glowing cia nigger.
I make fun of them too but not really don't tell my family I got stabbed by being in the ocean too long cia men.
Did you know when Devore was found handless their excuse was hands fall off in water? Take note kids, if you stay in the water your hands disappear.
Time to make hour-long videos of my fap-sessions in 4k, uncompressed, and call them "plan to assassinate the Clintons" or some shit. Might mix in some dolphin porn videos just for fun. You know they have to see through it all to completion, in case something is hidden somewhere in the video.
The CFR, Trilateral commission and Bilderberg are all globalist organizations. They have members in top positions in our Government including the FED and XYZ agencies , Jerome Powell as an example the FED chair is a CFR member. If you are a low level guy who comes across some info you shouldn't come across on your bosses you're liable to get whacked.
Yes
THEY TRIED
TO MAKE
HER PRESIDENT