I feel like absolute shit

It means just having sex once or a bunch of times and then leaving the girl

Nobody will give you a good answer because we don't know how your relationship works... objectively speaking, if he were really interested in you, he wouldn't be thinking about his ex. iirc from your previous posts he said something about coming back to her. Best course of action for you would be finding a guy who isn't still in love with his ex but that's not the answer you wanna hear so idk what to tell you

Not true, I've considered going back to my ex because the girl I liked didn't show me any sexual interest, so I assumed that we're just really good friends.

user I think we both see that OP is not and probably will never be this type of a girl. A girl you describe would never let her potential bf even think about his ex in the first place kek

Move on, don’t put yourself through an emotional hell. Work on yourself while single, you can find a new lover in the future.

I see.

I'd do pump and dump if I didn't have such a guilty conscience.

Yes, I've been thinking about doing just this. It's hard though.

Why would you let someone else fuck your husband?

>husband
Wut?

You're giving him away for free.

We've only been dating. He's hardly my "husband".

My point exactly.

I think I have self confidence issues. I always feel as if I'm never good enough and don't deserve anything, so when someone comes along who brings me joy I always assume I'm not good enough for him.

>Don't you know anything about guys?
You evidently don't. Sex =/= commitment, it never has, and especially not since the retarded idea of "liberation" caught on.

ftp.iza.org/dp4200.pdf
>"Social and legal changes have given people more autonomy over individual and family decision making, including rights over marriage, children born out of wedlock, the use of birth control, abortion, and divorce (Stevenson and Wolfers, 2007). Once again, men may have been able to disproportionately benefit from these increased opportunities: Akerlof, Yellen, and Katz (1996) argue that sexual freedom offered by the birth control pill benefited men by increasing the pressure on women to have sex outside of marriage"

tl;dr Begone, thot.

Don't waste your time on this guy. If he's choosing her over you, he isn't worth it.

For fuck's sake. Why do you assume every woman has the ability to just get whatever man they want?

What is this?

I am sorry op i am one of those guys we are just big emotional babies

A couple years ago I was in a similar situation only he and I did get together. I thought he was over her but he wasn't and it ended terribly. You dodged a bullet OP.

If you want to win him back, just be yourself. Obviously, he broke up with her and came to you for a reason.

I'm glad one of you finally got a taste of your own medicine
lol

Why? What did I do?

So you think I should just treat him as I was before, but show some kind of sexual interest?

So you want a comprehensive answer but the issue is pretty simple when the complexity of relationships is stripped bare to their basic underlying emotions.

First of all, it's not a question of love or really about you at all. It's all about his emotions and state of mind when he became involved with you.

Unlike many women, a lot of men are able to form discrete relationships without the complexities of falling in love. The problem is the actions of falling in lust can initially look like falling in love, confusing both the man and woman involved.

Take a typical break-up of a medium or long term relationship. The guy goes looking for someone to replace the ex but his emotions are not invested in the new girl(s).

Quickly the man realises he's in lust, usually 5 mins after he's blown a load in or over her and asks himself "what am I doing?"

This is followed by trying to rekindle the relationship with the ex, who may or may not take him back. If she doesn't he'll keep seducing or interacting with the side girl (who may not know about the ex).

Every time he does/says something with the new girl it triggers the guilt/desire to rebuild with the ex. So for a while the new girl is actually the emotional and sexual support he needs to rebuild things with the ex.

If he succeeds, he goes back. If not he will stay with the new girl but become distant and may even start to bully her as he grieves for the lost relationship. She hasn't a clue and wonders what she's doing to cause his behaviour to deteriorate.

TLDR: It's often known as a rebound relationship and they seldom last long.

i mean theres always time to act, its not too late, its never too laaaaaaaaate, take em and make em yours

be honest and real. you won't take my advice, but if you tell him you're interested in being more than fun time friends and that you want to be romantic and that the idea of him getting back with his ex hurts you and makes you wish you could change his mind, any rational, normal, WORTHWHILE guy would probably be like aight cool lets get sum ice cream. other user above me talking about rebounds has the right idea, getting with an ex in most situations is like divorce rates after the first marriage: they get worse. you could potentially save this dude from being a dumbass in his own timeline.

jk ignore other user, makes it sound like every relationship after the first is doomed, and to that I say horsecock

Because unless you have an ugly face or are supper chubby, a confident woman could probably take most guys by the hand and fuck him in a bathroom.

We say this because we know this about ourselves.

>How should I handle this?
The solution is so easy it's not even a problem
Tell. Him. You. Want. Him. To. Be. Yours.

That's literally it.

You should probably make a fucking move.

Oh, you're one of those selfish pricks that caws "but we're OBSESSED with sex and anyone that disagrees is a LIAR" until a woman says the same thing, then it's "oh my GOD you SEXIST CUNT, how could you??!!" Fucking over other men to fumble for pussy, how pathetic.

You have to go outside more, dude. What are you doing with your life.

Most women are too shy to seduce a guy.

>First of all, it's not a question of love or really about you at all. It's all about his emotions and state of mind when he became involved with you.

This makes sense.

>This is followed by trying to rekindle the relationship with the ex, who may or may not take him back. If she doesn't he'll keep seducing or interacting with the side girl (who may not know about the ex).

So, he was going after me only because he saw me as a replacement? I'll keep this in mind.

>Every time he does/says something with the new girl it triggers the guilt/desire to rebuild with the ex. So for a while the new girl is actually the emotional and sexual support he needs to rebuild things with the ex.

So is there anything I can do in this case to ensure I satisfy him to the point where he forgets about the ex and stays with me, or is he hopeless at this point?

>but if you tell him you're interested in being more than fun time friends and that you want to be romantic and that the idea of him getting back with his ex hurts you and makes you wish you could change his mind, any rational, normal, WORTHWHILE guy would probably be like aight cool lets get sum ice cream.

Hmmmm, all right.

>you could potentially save this dude from being a dumbass in his own timeline.

That's what I'm aiming to do.

Will that scare him away though?

You're still here? Sad!
Make a move, get rejected and move on. At this point it's really whatever: if you keep doing nothing, he will eventually go back with his exgf. At least if you make a move he will be forced to give you a clear and definite answer.

Don't be afraid of scaring him. Men are more afraid of being rejected than being pursued by multiple women at once.

I dont know how you got that out of what i said, but no.

What i was attempting to convey is that men are hard wired to go along with direction from a female.

Are you sure he won't see me as a creep if I attempt to make a move?

It's not too late, stop having victim and prey mentality start having predator and hunter mentality. Go out and get yours. Some guys want to be chased and seduced, treat his ex like an obstacle to overcome or a rival to beat not some impossible cock blocking wall. If you really want him you are going to have to make a move. Get to him or get him to come to you and escalate it physically a bit, show you are interested.

>How do I do that without being too obvious though

Are you retarded? Seduction is supposed to be obvious. YOU NEED TO SEDUCE HIM, not sit around hoping he makes a move on you. Fucking grow some balls and take action for once in your life.

You are hopeless, just by your responses I can tell you probably don't even maintain eye contact or touch him.

ROASTIE BTFO HEHEHEHEHAHAHAHA
now that's out of the way, honestly move on. don't do this to yourself. i know women never take anyone's advice, ever, but don't put yourself through this. and if you still decide to do it(which you will) just remember you could've easily backed out of this at any point. if i'm being honest, it doesn't sound like he was really into you, and i'm sorry it sucks and I know, but you should back off and see how things go with being friends with him. he may try to stir things up between you two again because he most likely knows what kind of "power" he has over you, but you have to be strong and not let that happen.

Got it.

Fuck off incel.

Imagine living your whole life with this kind of passivity and crippling self doubt. OP if you want to crawl up into a shell of never taking risks just because your feelings or ego might get hurt, you might as well put the bullet in your head right now.

>hehe you know nothing about guys
>actually, YOU know nothing about guys
>wow ur a fucking nerd lmao

way to take an L, bud

>woman's mentality.

If a woman does its just empowered seduction, but if a man tries this IT'S RAPE

>but if a man tries this IT'S RAPE
But if an ugly incel tries this IT'S RAPE

ftfy

I've seduced my way into many girls pants while they wondering if they wanted to return to their ex or when they were on a "break" from the relationship. It's when women are at their most vulnerable and open to sex. Just keep in mind that once they snap back to a normal emotional state chances are they will regret it and get back with their ex. Don't get attached if you are rebound guy.

Hahaha you have it so easy and yet still manage to fuck it up by acting entitled.

Do something or live with the consequences. If he says no you at least won't hate yourself for being spineless.

>won't hate yourself for being spineless.

Seriously this op.

Don't take this as me laughing at your misfortune. You've encountered a situation that men have to deal with for the rest of their lives, and you're deeply hurt that such injustice can even exist. You don't even know how cruelly you have treated people in the past when the shoe was on the other foot. How would you feel if a dude acted dismissive while angrily looking at you, and it turns out he was waiting for you to ask him out BECAUSE THATS YOUR JOB. You'd probably think that dude is entitled and lets things happen to him, rather than making things happen. Would you respect him? Hey guess what that's opposite world and this dude is you.

If you do manage to man up and ask him out - you'd better do more than just lie on your back like a dead fish and expect him to say it was the best sex he ever had. But let's take it one step at a time.

Because it's not like seductive women get labeled as "tricky" or "sluts" or anything...

just rape him.

OP here.

My plan is to start talking to this guy again very soon, try to stir up old feelings by acting exactly as I did when we first met, try to act flirtatious with him, compliment him, tell him how great I think he is, try to come off as sexual (I'll wear something cute, not revealing but cute), and, if things are going well, invite him somewhere. Good enough?

This is still here? Jesus

Sounds like a plan. Just be aware that he may see you only as a rebound.
Good luck

Nope

So what can you do? I think the best advice is telling him how you feel and that this is something you really want and not to lead you on to getting hurt.

If you want a real relationship with this guy then make sure he knows that. If you just want fun, sex and giggles, make sure he knows that too.

Don't forget to TOUCH HIM. That doesn't mean grabbing him by the pussy, but just touch him a lot. This really turns a guy on, and make sure you smell nice and be close to him. Make sure you space out the compliments and when he compliments you give a kiss on the cheek or a hug don't just awkwardly say "thanks". When you hug him make sure to hold it a bit, don't "bro hug" for a second. Also, cuddle a bit. If you sit down somewhere sit NEXT to him, not across from him. Do not allow objects to come between you and him, tables or bags or other women. This is no time for subtlety grab his arm and give sqeeze it a bit between your own arm and breast. Look him in the eyes, a lot. And most importantly of all, SMILE. You should seriously not wear anything you are not 100% comfortable in because it will be taxing already. Remeber his ex is a rival and you won't lose to her.

What else should I do?

Yes, I plan on doing something very similar.

Stop posting on Jow Forums

Soo many incels hating on OP. So fucking sad. Go get what's yours OP.

Do you think he likes you back, or do you think he wants his ex? If you're not afraid of being rejected, then tell him how you feel. For example:

Man user: hey op I'm thinking about getting back together with my ex
op: well that would be a shame
Dude: huh why do you say that
Op: because that effectively prevents us from hanging out
Dude: oh r u saying you like me? Why didn't you say something before I got back together with Stacey
Op: I was too shy
Dude: ok cool well we could still hang out if you want
op: but aren't you with Stacey now?
Dude: yeah but she doesn't have to know what goes on between us

So basically what I'm saying is your man crush is a jerk.

Are you a virgin?

Also for all we know the guy could have only mentioned his ex to see if how OP would respond. Pitiable subtlety.

It's painfully clear you have not had much human interaction.

Actually I am 99 percent certain if Op comes forward with her "liking him" after he is already told her he is into his ex then he is either going to call her crazy or try to pump and dump her or use her as a girl on the side anyone who disagrees with this is an idealistic whitenight faget.

Read
Also reread op. Also even if he wanted his ex back, what give you the slightest idea that his ex wants him back? There is a large likelyhood the dude is fishing for a response because OP has not been sending him signals that she is interested.

I honestly can't tell. He was VERY into me about 1-2 months ago. Out of nowhere his ex gives him a call, and all of a sudden he says he's thinking about going back to her.

>what give you the slightest idea that his ex wants him back?
She initiated it from what he told me.

you're fucked if this is the case.

Just get laid, boy.

The female sperg, everyone.

>implying women don't get aspergers

If common perception, political rhetoric or movies/adverts are anything to go by you would think that women do things differently, perhaps better. Bullshit, they are just as inept, nasty, narcissistic, competitive and cruel as men. But they are oppressed, which is why they don't excel at anything despite growing up faster than that other darn childish gender.

If there's anything women are better at, it should be finding a mate. But take away the obvious numbers advantage and you end up with this - an OP who is not just a sperg, but actively ignoring advice because "things usually happen to me, why should I make things happen".

It's disheartening to see that someone would take the effort to ask other people for help, only to rudely dismiss what more experienced, well-meaning people have to say. People came into this thread with a smile, hoping to help sort out an adorable problem, only to find out that it was made for attention, and none of the advice will be followed.

This is shameful. It will result in more kind of shitpost replies in the future to people who may actually need help because too many self-centred twits like OP have cried wolf for anyone to care.

Incel pls go and stay go. No one wants your shitty shit "just give up because it's better than trying" advice.

>shitty shit
Stephen King's days are numbered.

I've specifically lambasted OP for not trying. That makes me an advocate for not trying, as well as an incel. Apparently.

Jow Forums pls go.

He kinda has a point. I really think women would be happier if they developed a more go get'em attitude to dating.

Most problems they complain about with men are because we chase and therefore trophify them.

I mean, I'd "chase" him, but he's very shy and reserved and I'm worried that's going to scare him away. But, not chasing him in the first place is what made him think about returning to his ex.

It's OP obviously.

Sure pumpkin, it's because of his fragile personality.

Give it time, you will hate yourself for this.

We all know this girl won't get that guy. It's painfully obvious. I don't know why OP bothers bumping this shit

>implying a bj won't do the trick

>implying she will ever give anyone a blowie
she's beyond aspie, user

What indicates she's aspie?

Almost all girls are like this they just don't post it on Jow Forums. They have no reason to learn how to chase guys, it's the other way round, that's just biology.
Consider the fact that every guy who has ever approached you or shown you affection has had this plus a library of possible scenarios in which you publicly humiliate him, demolish his self esteem etc in the back of his head. We know you don't have balls OP but cmon, at least have a little balls.

So what should I do? Should I tell him how I feel or not?

OP here. is not me.

I've decided to let him make the move because I don't want to scare him away. Any tips to make it subtle? I can't be too obvious...

Not OP.