Wanting new sex

Have you done role play with your wife?

have you done really really weird role play with your wife that you would never tell another soul about? (stuff that may not even normally get you hard, just a new experience)

I get that, I do. But I still can't shake this feeling I will regret not sleeping with more girls, and I don't know why.

I am. I am grateful she has been loyal and that she gave me her virginity.

I not saying I like the feelings I'm having. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with/get rid of them.

It is petty, yes. But I just thought maybe it's something hardwired in me. Spreading the seed and all that.

I do love her. I admit it's different than in the beginning, and I sometimes wonder if I'm still "in love" with her, if this is just what it looks like after years of being with someone. But I absolutely love her as a person.

She's not my wife yet lol. And sure, we've certainly done some roleplaying over the years. It's fun sure, but I still know I'm fucking the same person I have for past almost half decade

Since you have done roleplay I suggest you drop LSD with her and fuck her right in the soul.

>I'm just bumping this thread to piss off the HURR ALL PREMARITALS SEXZ IS BAD ;__; retards.

You do realize that OP is only in the predicament that he is in because he is having premarital sex with multiple people right? You sound like the kind of retard who thinks that the solution to ending shootings in gun free zones is to somehow make them more gun free.

Go fuck other girls but don't complain when she starts fucking Jamal while you're at work ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Not OP here. I don't know if I could stay with the same person for long. It seems like the more I know people the more distant I get. I like fwb and having sex with different guys, but I'm lonely as fuck. There seems to be no place for me in the world of love and sex.

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Are you a girl or a guy?

She won't do that. She is incredibly loyal

Not OP, but I am in an LTR and have had sex with prostitutes on the side a few times, as well as several times when I was single too. For the most part they have been good experiences. But I wasn't looking to fill emptyness.

Is she not attractive anymore?

>She won't do that. She is incredibly loyal

Bet she said that about you, too

>I am in an LTR and have had sex with prostitutes on the side a few times

What's it feel like, being trash?

>I not saying I like the feelings I'm having. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with/get rid of them.

I hate to say this, but you're always going to want to fuck other people. There's really no way around it. Most people in long term relationships feel that way at least sometimes (women too)

You can either accept that you wish you could fuck other people but won't because you care about her.

Or you can break up with her so you can have sex with other people.

Or, you can be a sneaky cad and try to get some on the side.

Neither solution is perfect, but it's basically the options.

Neither one of us does drugs

jack off fantasizing about her hot friends. sounds scummy but infinitely better than cheating.

It doesn't feel bad, actually. I should note that we've been together over a decade and she has an illness that really limits the amount and kinds of sex we can have.

I love her and don't want to leave her, but at the same time sometimes I just want to really plough someone hard.

Most of the prostitutes I've met have been pretty cool people (one even gave me a cheesy holistic health book to pass on to my partner) who do a much needed job that is usually given a lot of shit.

Confirmed, absolute trash.

I feel bad for your gf. She doesn't know she's in a relationship with a guy who is thinking about cheating. You can't have it both ways retard, either break up or control yourself.

how long have you been together?

No, to me she is still attractive. It's odd because most people would probably say she was just another average girl you wouldn't pick out from the crowd. But she's always been very sexy to me.

I have been loyal mostly. I admit I have talked to/done sexually things with women online, but that's where it stays. And I only did because I felt like I needed an outlet.

I know some might say it's technically cheating, but I rationalize it in my mind that since it's purely online and emotions aren't involved(at least not strong ones) that I have been faithful.

It's part of why I need advice, because I've noticed the temptation to cheat in person has gotten stronger and I hate that.

And yet every time a cute girl at the grocery store smiles at me(I've been working out and get more attention now) I can't help but to think about what it would be like to fuck her.

This is what I was thinking of doing but it's difficult in a conservative communist city where prostitution is illegal and the prostitutes that are around are sub par, infamous for their shitty service. I don't want to lose my girl of nearly 3 years but she doesn't give my dick the proper loving it needs.

Aren't you worried about STDs?

>she doesn't give my dick the proper loving it needs

And have you talked with her about this?

>all this panic about sleeping around
>all this insensitive cheating
>all of this dishonesty and not communicating

this is why being in a committed relationship and swinging together is the best fucking route, hands down

I did, she told me she is asexual. This was after being together for nearly 2 years. I never really noticed, she would let me fuck her whenever I wanted. Now I have to beg for it which I hate.

>she is asexual
>I think about fucking other women all the time
>don't wanna break up
Are you seeing the issues here, op?

The way I see it, if I could only ever have sex with her again I would probably just dump her (which she has said often she doesn't want as she both loves and depends on me in a number of ways). So seeing some other girl for half an hour every few months to get my rocks off is a lesser sin.

11 years

I won't lie, part of the reason I do it is that up here in Canada it's essentially legal. So there's no worry of outside legal intervention and most of the women working as prostitutes are a lot more open and relaxed than I imagine they would be if it was all illegal.

Honestly, not really. They tend to be far more paranoid about getting something from me than I am from them, so they're very careful and I don't go for anything more risky than fingering.

>this entire post
I hope she can get away from you dude. You sound like a degenerate scumbag. Way to lessen my view of this thread OP. The things you talk about planning are not normal, just break up with her. Goddamn.

>if I could only ever have sex with her again I would probably just dump her (which she has said often she doesn't want as she both loves and depends on me in a number of ways

So did you openly tell her this? That if she doesn't want you to break up with her, then she needs to let you slop around in other pussy?

Or would she still love you if she knew you were trash?

If I am a loving and caring partner in all other ways, what makes what I do so terribly, terribly bad? It's not like an affair where I am emotionally attached or interested in someone else.

I don't see a lot of fundamental difference between that and watching porn (which she's fine with). Both are expending sexual energy lusting over someone else. One is just in person.

I have not, as it would clearly upset her a whole lot. Though I think there is a good chance she would actually understand to a degree, but I know the thought of it would upset her.

You can try and justify it all you want but you're a piece of steaming dog shit and deep down you know it. Like I said, I hope she gets far, far away from you.
>and watching porn is not the same as cheating nigga.

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I actually see it as somewhat virtuous. Can you articulate why I am such a piece of shit? Or in which ways it actually hurts her?

And yeah, porn isn't the same obviously, but I don't see it as completely different either.

Talk to your partner about it dude.
My wife on ocassion will pick me up in a bar wesring a wig. Or vice versa. There are ways to spice up the bedroom and if she loves you and wants to keep you she will do it if you approach it carefully.

>how am I piece of shit?
Hmm let's see
>think about other girls all the time
>emotionally using gf
>will travel for a hooker
>no consideration for her feelings
>think porn and cheating go hand in hand (spoiler, they don't)
>not concerned about STDs from said hookers
>not willing to beak up
Yeah no reason at all for you to be a piece of shit. None.

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You're always going to wonder what sex might be like with other people, just don't act on it. Sex with someone you've been been with for a while is better, you get to know each others bodies and know what gets the other person off. 1 night stands usually suck. Try new things to keep your sex life fresh and exciting, that's what me and my husband do ,

>think about other girls all the time
Hardly all the time, I simply said that it's not at all uncommon for people in long term relationships to desire fucking other people. That sholuldn't be too shocking, but it might be if you haven't been in a long relationship. What's your longest so far?

>emotionally using gf
How am I emotionally using her? We love each other, are almost each other's best friends and enjoy most of the time we spend together. Also I am a caregiver for her illness in many ways.

>will travel for a hooker
I never said I travel for it, and actually don't. When I do see someone they're visiting a local hotel or some such.

>no consideration for her feelings
But I do consider her feelings, which is part of why I don't simply dump her so I can date someone else who is more physically able.

>think porn and cheating go hand in hand (spoiler, they don't)
Not hand in hand, but on the same spectrum of lusting and having sexual release over someone else.

>not concerned about STDs from said hookers
I explained the issue with that and the safety.

>not willing to beak up
I am actually somewhat willing to break up and we've come close several times but neither of us wants the other out of our lives.

>But I do consider her feelings, which is part of why I don't simply dump her so I can date someone else who is more physically able.
NOPE.jpg

If you really considered her feelings, you would be honest with her so she could make her own decisions about what she wants to do about your behavior.

Would you be ok with her fucking other guys?

I'll grant, that's a decent point.

I'd be totally fine with that, yeah.

Ask her if she's interested in an open relationship for a period of time.

Tell her exactly how you feel.

What do you get from a marriage that you can't get from a committed LTR? I mean really.

A marriage is a contract between you, your wife, and the government. If you ever decide you want out (or she decides she wants out) then one of you - probably you - will be the one getting FUCKED financially.

The thing is that though I'd be fine with it, I highly doubt she would want to. I am the person she most wants to sleep with, the issue is that between her various health issues we really only get to once every week or two. She's barely able to leave the house most days, so running around chasing after another dude to bang isn't something she's likely to want to do. She does tell me about her sex dreams about various TV people and watches my porn sometimes so that's cool.

Its an never ending cicle buddy, the famous "the grass is always greener at the other side of the fence" complex, leaving her to fuck some random bitches would give you momentary satisfaction, but it would quickly turn into deep regret since you gave up on a possible beautiful marriage and family, for some casual fucks, and even if somehow you manage to find another girl who you ended up marrying, these thoughts would come back eventually.

"Explore your sexuality" is just a stupid meme that vapid people use to validate their promiscuity, it will do no good to you, but just make it harder to find wife material by the time you decide to settle down, since most already be taken.

Think about it carefully, give it time to see if those thoughts will eventually fade, try focusing on your girl again, just don't make any big decision out of impulse, best of the luck to you user.

Sorry for the bad englando btw.

>tfw reading this thread

Cheating is a violation of an agreement set by the people involved in the relationship. It is the highest violation of trust you can commit to a person in your relationship. It involves gaslighting. It is inherently abusive to the person, even if they don't know. It is unacceptable in every possible scenario.

If you want to change your relationship agreement, that's fine. Proper protocol is to bring it up with your partner, no matter how hard the circumstances or what you expect their response to be. This is the only way to have a healthy relationship. Honest and open communication. Anything else is lies, deception, and misrepresentation of who you are or what you both are. No exceptions.

t. romantically monogamous sexually polyamorous swinger

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Great. Now dump that poor woman so she can get someone better.

You will always feel attracted to other women. No matter how much you love your partner. You will always want to desperately fuck other women, because that's our biology as men. Spread the seed and shit, I guess. Fuck nature, right?

Lots of white knight, self-righteous basement dwellers will get triggered by the thought of infidelity, but it's actually completely normal and not uncommon at all. But they do have one thing right, you should not (and shouldn't have to) keep your partner in the dark about it.

>self-righteous basement white knights
Jow Forums troll spotted. Go back and never show up here again. Thanks.

What? Make coherent point or don't bother posting.

>infidelity
You mean polygamy, right!? Because infidelity will never ever be something normal to me.

You need to accept that that's just how relationships evolve. ou bought into the constant flirty stage jew and now when your relationship settles for companionship and real trust instead of constant sex bonding like in the beginning you think something is wrong. No, OP. Everything is perfect for you. You're currently just in a mental satet of an addict which still thinks if maybe the next shot would be even better than staying clean. You accustomed yourself to the feeling of beeing loved and cared for and now can't REALLY appreciate it anymore, your dick takes the lead.

I'll tell you what will happen if you let him have his way.
In you overconfidance from a married perspective (always having pussy) you'll get a hot chick and fuck her. You'll have a great high, maybe even for a couple weeks. But the regret will quickly come about as soon as you look your spouse into the eyes. You will have to exist in this state or completely kill of your feelings for her for your own desires. Either way your relationship will go to shit, prolly even in the same time as your sex one, as the other women will not want to be too deepy involved in your drama just for a fuck. If you got yourself a psycho one, she might enjoy it as a ego boost beeing able to break a marriage apart with her pussy, but that's even worse as they will break you afterwards as well.

So now you got neither your constant good waifu sex nor your once in a while great side bitch sex.

You lost everthing and are a single in an age where everyone else got kids and plans their future. Ask yourself if it is worth it. If it's not, go and retrain your brain. Meditate and see it as a stoic exercise. Don't let your desires ruin your live like a kid. I hope you make the best out of it. Good luck.

Grass is greener.

>has a womb ready and waiting in a stable relationship
>tries to explain why it's more natural to casually fuck a random bitch because muh seed spreading
Humans were monogamous since we sattled into agriculture, some 150.000 years ago. You're litterally the nigger of the white race if you still fall for it. Make your wife poop out 15 kids instead of nutting in a wet condom inside a random STD ridden slut if you want to call on nature.

>humans invented agriculture 150kya

You dumb nigger, our species was barely starting to EXIST 150kya. You know nothing about human evolution or biology.

good post

She most likely feels the same way.
Time to cut your losses.

>Cutting your losses because you're going through a tough phase.
People nowadays are so shallow, why even bother with relationships then!?

That's some big information to leave out. It's obvious your sexual needs aren't bring fulfilled, on top of that you've taken the position of caregiver for this genetic dead end.

Tell us what her problem is, but chances are good that you're holding her back too. She will wallow in her weakness as long as you're her stability, and you will eventually break under the weight of another person stuck to your back.

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youre being a animal

you have a keeper. She's loyal and was a virgin before you had sex with her. Don't ruin your relationship. marry her already. If you break up with her shell just be another woman who will go ride the cock carousel.

Man up, marry her and take responsibility for taking a girl's virginity. People these days... If you said this crap 50 years ago you'd get punched in the face.

If she says she's asexual then no wonder, you can't enjoy sex with someone who doesn't enjoy it back. Break up with her, you two are not sexually compatible and that will wreak havoc on your psyches in the future. Not worth it.

>humans were monogamous for 150,000 years

You fail. Your lack of knowledge is truly remarkable.

>equating lusty casual sex with paying a whore to fake interest

Lol

No I meant infidelity. A huge percentage of the population (even higher outside of the US) has openly admitted to cheating on their partners. Conservative estimates put the rate at 30% of marriages experience infidelity.

Totally normal. And the answer is grass is always greener. If you live the fuck life you'll long for a relationship.

If you're in a committed liyal relationship you'll crave the fuck life.

So it's not about shaming yourself or thinking you aren't in love. It's just instinct. It happens. It's about managing.

I work construction so I'm around mostly dudes daily, that helps. Outside I'll limit contact (not cut out. Need a social life) with women I find attractive.

Then the other two things I use effectively are: take my wife on a date and have a great time together. That goes a long way to keep on center and you should be doing that anyway.

And if all else fails. I jerk it. All feelings of sexual desire vanish in an instant. It's a last resort because too much screws with my sex life but.. it works.

>Fear or missing out.

Think of the last time you had a mad craving for a hamburger. Did you get it? Was it life changing? Do you even give a fuck now?

What about the last time you had a mad craving and didn't get it? Are you losing sleep?

I cheated in a past relationship when I was younger and dumber. It does nothing. I also had my fill when single. Never life changing or quality of life altering. It's an in the moment pleasure, that's all.

Which brings me back to point one. Just greener grass brother.

This guy knows what's up.

Do it once
The regret and guilt will teach you a thing or two maybe
If you're gonna cheat, don't fuck it up, don't tell anyone and keep it undercover
After the momentary pleasure you will value your gf a lot more knowing the shit you've just done

>agriculture 150k years ago

Yeah no. The humans that invented agriculture had mostly the same genome as you and me.

You're pathetic. I'd give anything to have what you have, a stable loving relationship with a good girlfriend

Your mind is wondering because you can't control your lust. But say you dumped your gf for another girl you want to fuck. After dating for 6 months it would be just the same situation all over again. You're not focusing on correcting the root of the problem, which is allowing your passions to control you instead of the other way around

I agree with this guy about everything.

I love my wife and want to stay with her. She is a perfect woman for me. Great mother, great in bed, fun to be around, and I can trust her.

Do I want to nail that hot young girl flirting with me? Ohh yea I do. I guess that show's I'm still alive and male.

I also take my wife out on dates. When we can, we'll get a motel room, go out drinking and dancing and then pound each other all night. She's knows exactly what I like, even if she doesn't look like that thot in the club.

What would you guys do in the same situation as op, but your gf is LDR and you only see each other twice a year? Really tempted with a fwb

Sorry to break it to you, but LDR is not actually a relationship worth much at all. You two are basically getting the worst parts of a relationship (no variety) and the worst parts of being single (not having a loving person around when you go to bed at night). Stop this charade and "break up" from this fake relationship.

I mean, we do have plans to move in together and I love her very much, it's been 6 years already
I just feel bad for not having anyone while she's gone

That's expected. How long have you been apart/will you be apart?

Cost/benefits analysis required.

We started out as a LDR, only seeing each other in December and July
Planning on getting together in two years or so
We get along really well, we can talk and share about anything, even retardaded Jow Forums memes

I mean there would be no risk of she finding out, I just don't know if I would feel terrible by getting a casual fwb, it's a friend of mine and we talked a lot about this, she's totally okay with that

You only see your gf twice a year?! Fuck man that's sad. IMO that's not a healthy relationship, or even a relationship at all.

If I were you, I would break up. Maybe if you two move to the same city you can rekindle what you had?

I know it sounds horrible but I was thinking of keeping her around and seeing her twice a year while keeping this fwb
At least while we can't see each other more often
I feel really tempted even though it's so damn wrong

I'm her first bf and she's pretty lonely in her town doesn't care at all about not seeing other boys

You sure about that? Women get hit on constantly and you aren't around to confirm if she's staying loyal sexually.

Break it to her gently that this LDR isn't making you feel good. You love her blah blah blah but this situation just isn't sustainable.

Pretty sure about that. It's hard to believe but she really is that loyal

Point is, we already broke up once for similar reasons and depression hit hard on both of us for months, she refused to simply stay friends and we got together again

Don't know what would her response be if I proposed an open relationship tho

Sounds a bit like attachment and dependency. Why would you be depressed? You weren't seeing each other anyways...

It's totally reasonable for her to not want to be friends. But man, you seem young and you're wasting your youth. Get out and meet people. When you get older you will regret you hadn't been more active.

The fact that we talk every single day about everything and have thousands of plans for the future was a bit too hard when we decided to break up
It's fucked up, but we really kinda depend on each other

It's this fear of wasting my youth that made me make those moves on my friend, and the fact I got really happy e relieved with her physically is what makes me feel weird

The ldr gf completes me in every other way but I still miss this physical part
A friend of mine said this lust would go away and I should slowly dettach from this fwb, don't know if I should go this route

I was in a codependent LDR for 7 years that formed in childhood. Trust me, if it was formed in your youth, and you can't function as adults without one another, you need to break it off, unrelated to the LDR aspect. No exceptions.

I don't understand this. I haven't experienced what you're talking about so that's part of it And im not being a jerk here. Open to debate and clarification..

But it seems to me if you're together and doing fine despite the co dependence then there's no issue. If it's some fear that if the worst happens and you're suddenly forced in adulthood to be apart, I see how that would be terrible.. but wouldn't just breaking up make a future possibility a current reality? Aren't you just putting yourself through that anyway?

And giving up a dear friend in the process?

No. Codependency formed in childhood means your mental faculties stay in childhood. In the areas you are codependent, you will revert to childlike behaviors and impulses, as you were not pushed to develop them to an adult level due to the crutch of codependency.

Makes a lot of sense actually..
How does this manifest in public away from your partner. Does it?

Yes. A good way to know what areas you lack are the areas you reach out to your codependent for. A good check is to see how well you handle it without them. I promise you, it'll feel like withdrawal.

Well I know the withdrawal noise but that's all just human pair bonding. There's some heavy addictive chemicals that get released in intimate relationships.

Breakups are heroine withdrawal basically. Same treatment too. Stay the fun away from the source (the ex)

>Stay the fun away

Man my autocorrect is fucking wholesome.

Dump her and go have casual sex.

start roleplaying or other kinky stuff to get your dick going
fear of missing out is shit tier for cheating