To be honest I'm hoping that just typing this out will help order the tumultuous chaos that's currently in my head; this conversation happened last night after a party and she's still asleep in my bed.
Generally I don't have a problem or issue with what significant others have done in the past. I do think a person's past choices and actions inform who they are today. My girlfriend has had 137 partners and is 25. That seems *extreme* to me. I could easily have handled 50 I think. Genuinely all of my googling of "insecure about past" has turned up results with guys struggling that their partners have had over 50. 137. It's like an order of magnitude "worse".
I find it hard to believe I can compete with all of those other men, and that I can mean something to her. That's how I feel. I'm struggling to believe our sex can be emotionally fulfilling and important for her as surely by now it's just a meaningless transaction. I feel bitter. A raw bitterness in my stomach that permeates my entire body.
She cried hard and told me she didn't tell me because I would break up with her, and that it doesn't matter. That seems like a contradiction to me, as if she thinks it does matter and that either the number or the reasons why the number are so high constitute a red flag. It's hard to trust that she won't get bored and just fuck someone on a whim. We've been dating 2 months. Help. It's been a good start to the relationship.
137? You are the dumbest person if you don't cut contact RIGHT NOW. I would NEVER date anybody with over 5 previous partners. There's a reason why promiscuity is looke down upon. If you choose to ignore it, you deserve whatever happens to you.
Oliver Gray
Something about it tells me she might be lying to test you. 137 just seems too much. Try to lead a tiny investigation on the side. Doesn't have to be much, just ask her inconspicuously when opportunity presents about her previous partners, see if she's making things up on the go or there's substance behind it. Obviously a couple first ones are gonna be real, but if you keep at it you should eventually see clear discrepancies that hint she is just testing you.
So my advice is - give her the benefit of the doubt while also try to slowly find out the truth.
That being said, if you find out clear evidence that she really did have this many partners (50+) then I advice you part ways, for your own sake. She might be trying to score pity points but don't let it get into your head. It's just no good.
Brody Ortiz
Man, I must be weird, because I personally just don't care about a girl's sexual past. Because like, if she cheats, the relationship is over. It doesn't matter if she's been with 1 guy or 100.
But eh, I guess promiscuity psychologically affects girls differently.
>told me she didn't tell me because I would break up with her, and that it doesn't matter. That seems like a contradiction to me, Not really a contradiction. Like, imagine you were hanging with a hypochondriac that freaks out about germs. There's no need to tell them that the other month, you stuck an ungloved hand in the toilet to retrieve a dropped phone. The person would probably unreasonably freak out and never touch your hand again, even though it's pointless and you've already washed your hands hundreds of times since then. It's not an issue - but it becomes an issue if they know.
As for her lying, I don't think so. Why would she artificially inflate her number given society's hostile orientation towards female sexuality? If anything, girls are known to serially downplay their body count. With a number like 137, there's no point in downplaying because it's already quite high. And up-playing is, as already mentioned, highly improbable.
You have cause and effect backwards. Being promiscuous doesn't cause issues, mental issues lead to being promiscuous. Sex is a socially acceptable way for men (historically) and women (more recently) to reach for self esteem and validation that they aren't getting in a healthy way. Frankly, I think anyone under 24 or 25 lacks the self awareness and experience to make good sexual choices in any direction.
Adrian Brooks
I'm impressed by her record keeping skills.
Camden Lee
She tried all of them and ultimately rejected them. She is now with you.
You win.
Hunter Thompson
>your gf got pumped and dumped by over 10 full football teams but that's okay, now you get to pick up the pieces and allow her to settle for a harmless beta
LOL
OP leave that whore.
Caleb James
gross. fucking hell what???
Christian Miller
yeah that's fucking disgusting that's a higher body count than a lot of pornstars and she did it for free How can you seriously consider a loose slut like that to be good gf material
