After spending the whole day yesterday with my girlfriend, and having an amazing time...

No OP it doesn't change a damn thing. I feel for you and had the same illness, love blindness. Lets just go with she was really into him, it all worked out since you are ok and they still get to hang out with each other, even spend quality time in their friend group without you. But for her to still have feelings for him a year after despite being with you for a year shows how deeply she cares for him and how little she cares for you. Its almost like she wanted him but settled for you.

I guess I'll try to talk to her tonight about dropping him, like she should be doing. Or at least having her get angry at him, because she did say she was angry that at the whole situation last night because it's threatening her relationship and she can't believe she even considered it. She should at least talk to him about what he's doing wrong.

If she makes no change, no difference in behavior toward him, then I'll start to pull back from both of them because they clearly both don't have me in mind.

This is really bumming me out.

>I'll try to talk to her tonight about dropping him
No, don't try. She needs to drop him. Cold turkey no more answering texts, no phone calls. You need to talk to him and tell him you know what's going on, and that you need him to back off. If she can't accept these things, she's not worth the trouble.

Any updates on the situation?

I'm still at work, I'll talk to her once I get home which will be about half an hour and let you know.

So, after talking to her, she told me she put him down. She told me that when my friends and her were on Xbox, he was being suggestive and trying to start something. She then told me that after she got off, he tried to start a text conversation. She told him off, told him how happy she is in her current relationship, how in love she is with me, and that he had his chance but he dropped her back when they were first starting things during her ex's relationship. She's not responded to anymore of his messages, and she said she would block him if he persists- I asked her to do that. She keeps asking me not to talk to him, he asked her not to tell me anything when he told her that he loves her a few nights ago. He was afraid of how upset I would be with him. She also won't let me talk to him because she'll be at his uni, with the rest of our friends next month, and he'll "ruin her life" while she's there for just that month.

How does this all sound?

>and he'll "ruin her life" while she's there for just that month.
He threatened her?

>Because all of her boyfriends in the past have abused her, and been horrible to her.
That's what they all say. There is ZERO excuse to cheat, as you can simply get out of the relationship if it's really so bad. I guarantee she will eventually find some way to rationalize cheating on you, and you'll deserve it for settling with a whore.

No, but he can be very verbally hostile when he gets upset with others. Honestly, it's extremely demeaning when he does it. He has been that way for a little while now to her and only started being nice to her again a few months ago. That kind of stuff really gets into her emotions, and she is afraid of that happening if he finds out she told me.

>She cheated on that guy with my best friend
DROP HER NOW user FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T DO IT

haha shes not feeling horrible about that, she just didn't tell you the full story. I'd be asking where did she sleep that night... whenever a girl cheats its an emotional commitment as oppose to one of just lust, they're ruled by there emotion and when they are not, they are prone to strike again. Not to say people can't change but when someone does something they open a door they can see in and out off.

It's not looking favorable, and if she has to question it even once coupled with the fact of her past generally there is a reason behind that but even more so it eliminates the factor of her ever feeling unconditional about you.

Get angry and remove yourself is my advice.

For now, acquiesce to her desire to not fuck with him. She did as she was told, she blocked him and told him off. She's in the green so far. The minute he starts getting hostile, you kick his fucking ass.

That night she went back to her house, and he went back to his- He hitched a ride with one of the friends they were all out with. She also called me once she got home, as she does every night. There's no worry about them having done anything that night. But I see what you're saying, there's the possibility in it happening again because she's done it before and is more susceptible.

I'm also a very calm person, so it's hard for me to just get angry with her and just go like that- especially when all I have ever done in this relationship is encourage just simply sitting down and talking whenever there is a problem so we can make things work. If it looks like it won't, I'll get up and leave. It'll hurt, but I can do it if it comes to it.

Yeah, ever since she and I talked it's been a bit more reassuring that she understands what her priorities are, and what she has to do. I'll also tell her if he ever gets hostile, she can come to me haha.

Mate you need to drop both. She loves drama and he is a fucking rat. You deserve better as you seem a nice trustworthy guy. Believe me my dude you will regret holding onto this relationship.

user...your killing me... you seem like a good guy. Why put up with these assholes being alone is better than being betrayed and you'll find some new people eventually i promise.

This relationship is something very special to me, we're both extremely compatible, became amazingly attached when we first started dating, and if I were to honestly think of my dream girl before we dated I would've described someone just like her. I really can't just let all of that go. Especially when we're so compatible, we hope to get married when we're graduated. I really care for her, and want to be with her throughout life. It makes things difficult.

The only thing is that she has some kind of serious underlying issues, mainly involving self esteem and depression, and as much as I'd like to help her, there's only so much I can do.

As for my friend, I could easily drop him if I really wanted- which it looks like it'll get to that point. I can't stand him sometimes, but I always hold a stupid sentimental value to us being friends since childhood, and doing my absolute best to making things last.

If it ever comes down to it, I'll let them both go. If she thinks she would really be happier without me, then I'm gone. I'll still love her, but I can just let it all go easy. But for now, I hope to keep fighting for what I really believe in. If it doesn't turn out to be what I expected, and it's about to burn me, I'll know it's time to stop and let them go.

So you wanna stay with the girl and try to remain friends with the guy? Job done.

every girls ex is abusive if you didn't know that

>I think I completely reassured her back into our relationship.
Ooooh, boy.

>he can be very verbally hostile when he gets upset with others
You should be dropping him too. Sounds like he's not worth the trouble.

Why do people integrate their gfs into their group of male friends or date girls who have guy friends to begin with? Are you asking to get cucked?

T. My gf doesn't even want to hang out with my friends because she'd rather be alone with me whenever we're together.

>she committed a heinous act of betrayal but it doesn't count because it wasn't against me

I'll never, ever get this mentality.

My current girlfriend and I both cheated on our others to be with each other. A year later and we're still together and spend nearly ever moment with each other.

That's because deep within yours and her soul, you both know you're only good enough for each other after what you've both done.

Nope. I've never met a woman so fluid and adept at conversation, willing to critically think, as well as invested in her own hobbies and interests but still wanting to share them with me because she values my input.

Don't get me wrong, the rule of thumb that if she cheated on her ex, she'll cheat on you is sound. But if you both have the chemistry of a house and fire, go for it.

Why the fuck would you ever date a girl that one of your friends fucked??

>implying cheating isn’t wrong

Holy shit bro please leave her. She masturbated over Skype and sexted another guy, who in their right minds would think that's ok to do in a relationship? Would you do that to your gf? You need to do some self reflecting bro, you're gf is a cheating (sexting and masturbtibg over Skype IS cheating, but they definitely fucked too) disrespectful ass, and you're a beta male that's been stepped over his whole life I can safely assume. If I was you, Id dump her and beat the shit out of my "friend" for his actions and to show anyone else if they even try with my girl I won't take it lightly. I left my last gf because she hung out with her ex behind my back, I won't be disrespected. I can see the larger problem here though, you have a weak personality, and when people get the chance, they will step all over you and you'll let them. It's ok just practice standing up for yourself and read some books on self esteem etc. good luck I believe in you

Yeah and then why didn't you break up first you spineless faggot

Youre girlfriend is a whore. Fuck her in the ass and record every moment you spend with her. She is using her emotions to manipulate you and I guarrantee shes going to cheat on your ass eventually whether she cries afterwards or not matters fuck all.