I'm looking at some jail time soon. What should I expect?

filthy niggers. sandwiches and cookies. Shitting and pissing next to 30 people. Feeling like a caged monkey and realizing the world evolved into such a place where this happens

depends
what did you do?
If you are just some bulglrar/thief, nothing will happen at all but you still need to get into a group quickly, otherwise some groups will notice you are isolated from the rest and will try to take advantage from you.
If you killed someone, you'll be forced to become a thug for someone whenever you like it or not
If you raped someone, well... better prepare that boypussy and anus

What did you do, leaf?

It'll be a feeling unlike any you've ever felt before user

BBC

See

But what crime did you commit?

tfw jail would be awesome if it weren't for low-iq people.

If Trailer Park Boys is accurate, canada jail doesn't seem that bad

You're peak boypussy
I'd start stretching now to avoid tearing

Unironically I hope you get stabbed up faggot.
Fucking sicko.

Did it menace you or threaten you in any way, or did you just assume since it's a pitbull it is there to fuck you up and respond accordingly?

It’s basically just a more dangerous boot camp.

Hope you get raped by a nigger.

>then took it into my garage and cut its balls off with hedgeclippers
Why?

Nice bait thread

Animal cruelty, causing unnecessary suffering. Prosecutor wants 3 years.

Canada is chock full of somalis by now, i dont know if tpb is that accurate anymore

Dilated sphincter

He was jealous that the dog was bigger than him.

people who are found guilty of killing animals aren't treated well in prison, be transparent with your fellow inmates tell them this and they won't kill you.

You should talk to your lawyer, I think there's a way you can get a reduced sentence by killing yourself.

We have the CBC in Canada

3 years of brother lovin'

What did you do

I'm gonna look up your case and put the word out there.

You are going to get raped

Based and pitbulled. I'd definitely consider a beeline to europe.

DAmn man, fucking snow people

Prepare your asshole criminal scum

oh, cool, youre a psychopath.

get fucked

Any pitbull is a menace and I was being proactive. Thank god no kids were encountered by this thing before I got to it.

It doesn't die but now it's much less aggressive

Judging by prison architect standards, Basically camp but your stuck in the building for who knows how long

Yea, you are getting raped for that. Shitbull owners end up en mass in prison.

I have a Russian passport because I'm a dual citizen but how do I avoid border authorities etc

Get Jow Forums or get rekt

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You're an idiot. If the dog came into your yard and you killed it, you could claim you feared for your safety and make a self defense argument. Instead you lured and then tortured a dog - clearly not self defense.

I hate pitbulls but you deserve punishment for your stupidity.

I don't even like pitbulls.

But goddamn dude you deserve a castration death

I tortured it? Lol. It was unconscious while I castrated it. That's pretty humane.

just sleep all day..guards will love you for it and before you know it you wake up and it's over

Based, but how did they find out it was you? Your first mistake was getting caught.

They are like 60lb dogs you pussy

>canadian prison
probably gayer than the ymca

GLHF

>in michigan
>tobacco products are not allowed

Serious advice user...don't gamble, mess the sissies, or put your business on the street. Also, if someone tries to punk you, stick up for yourself. If someone calls you a bitch, hit them.

I'll probably just do this

Six figures yet you failed to hire the "right" lawyer.
Larp.

>somalis

Shit moths, Rand.

based

pitbulls are nigger dogs that need to be exterminated

I don't even know what I'd do if my neighbour killed my dog. You're a real piece of shit

you clubbed someones dog with a fucking hammer.

i unironically hope you get fucking raped in prison

Jail sucks. Mind your own business, don't gamble, no drugs, etc... and try to be respectful and a model inmate. I did 90 days and the boredom and lack of any control was the worst part for me.

bring a rake

Anesthetic

>cigarettes
not so fast

>this

There are videos on YT by people who have been in prison speaking about it and what they made of it. Watch them you goof.

I didn't know my neighbour had cctv cameras on their property

This but unironically. Jail with anons would basically be Landsberg II: A new beginning

I hired a good lawyer, a family friend, he said he will do what he could. He said I was lucky that he got me house arrest instead of being detained

>I then took it into my garage and cut its balls off with hedgeclippers
You're not following traditional canadian values

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youtube.com/watch?v=Ovgj5hdng7s
Yeah, real fuckin menaces here, totally quaking at these dangerous monsters, good thing you proactively decided to torture one to death on a very thin basis, you're definitely proving yourself above the dangerous psychotic beast you summarily put down.
is this fuckin b8?

MOSTLY BUTT STUFF...you will be raped repeatedly until your gay gross, anus bleeds...

then you will flip and "talk"...and then you will die....sry

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Based and Redpilled.
Whatever you do, tell the police nothing interrogation, and try and get as short of a sentance as possible.
Given that you live in Canada, the biggest thing you'd expect in prison is never ending soul-crushing boredom.

I unironically hope you die in prison, you fucking subhuman waste of atoms.
S to spit on OP's grave

This is probably a bs bait thread.

6 fig pharmy job and schooling by a guy who is crazy as fuck?

Highly doubt it.

Dude you're not rational. You had an opportunity to eliminate the pitbull legally and instead you cut it's nuts off like a fucking psycho.

You lack critical thinking skills and you're going to jail for it. Too dumb to function unfortunately.

I have some sympathy for people who function purely on emotion and lack the ability to plan, understand consequences, and act accordingly, but candidly - you seem violent and cruel so you probably belong in jail

S

I didn't see this at first. I don't know about Canada but in America, animal abusers are treated the same as sex offenders. You're gonna have a rough time.

Good one, Cherry picking

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What do you mean "on their property"? You said it was on your property.

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This.

I did a two year bid, ate a bunch of fish sticks, tuna, and some weird meat that looks like pork. I’m not a retard so they immediately put me in the work unit. One hour of gym per day, free coffee/food, tobacco and weed rolled in bible paper, played cards every night until lock-up. Watched football on sundays, hockey most other nights. Saturday was movie night. We could order books via money you had in commissary. We played ball hockey twice a week in the gym. We had an original x-box with Halo and a few other shit games from early 2000s, a pool table and a ping pong table. We had a guy who was in the Rock Machines so he had an in with a guard who snuck in porno mags, bales of tobacco, weed, crack, hydroes and oxys and all that.

Advice - dont tell people you are there for harming an animal. Don’t make ANY noise early in the morning (dont drag chairs around or shit that makes noise). Don’t randomly attack someone early in your bid to try to look tough. Wait to see what kinds of gangs are established and hang out with the one who looks like they run the unit (hang out with other whites). Because of your job make up fake shit to insure yourself. If I were you I would tell them that you are in for stealing a shipment of dilaudid or fentanyl patches or something. Tell people you have a tonne of them cached and that when you get out maybe you guys can get into business together.

It’s seriously not that bad. I have other tips if you want, currently phoneposting

You can't be serious? For castrating a fucking pitbull? Animal castrations including on dogs are done all the time. How retarded does one have to be in order to be outraged by this?

you know it's funny how jail would be an easy laid back ride if the majority of people in it weren't fuck heads

As I said, I wrote that I left the dog after I castrated it behind my neighbours house in the alley. They had cctv cameras that saw me.

Cunt I hope you get treated how they treat pedos in jail. You're gonna get made someone's bitch and anally raped.

You can't cherry pick if they're all dangerous brutal psychopaths like you're assuming, there'd be no cherries to pick. Now you're talking shit about how you were seen on --their property-- and still no word at all about any provocation from the dog.
You sound like a vindictive psycho.

Oh my fucking god
Don't tell me you actually knew beforehand that they had CCTV?

It's a dumb animal, and it serves yoiu right desu. Don't be a dumb caveman hom immediately turns to violence just because a Vietnamese pottingcraft forum tells you to, you stupid autist.

Saged because OP is a liar and a fagget

If you can make it to the US on the road without border control. Figure out if US shares bail system with Canada on their airports on your flight to RU. I imagine they do. If so, you'll need go further south to some shithole.

Alternatively, find a russian cargo boat in a port en route to russian port, explain situation, pay $500, hitch a ride. Works only if you have some contact to maritime industry, but definitely the safest.

Correct, one of their cameras caught the actual hammer hitting the head but the rest wasn't caught on camera

did you NOT understand human intuituion?

you are a moron?

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Yeah. Story like this would have made the news. There's nothing

S

KEK you are not Jow Forums, faggot

That a trait serial killers have.
Harming animals.
Congrats.
I would dismember you.

I did not know about this. I don't talk to them. I don't see the point in establishing relationships with my neighbours

B8 of decent quality, leaf

Always higher the ex-prosecutor who has the reputation for getting people "off" or reduced sentence. They usually know the judges and prosecutor s.

Get into a routine, mind your business when you are tested you better handle it rather than put it off. If you fight and don't snitch you will earn your respect.
It is barbarous in there. Keep your head up. Your mentality in the way you handled the dog should get you through.

Next time think it through man.

Actually this is good. Find a way to get prescribed seroquil.