Should I just drop out?

Dude, you can't diagnose your fucking daughter with BPD. That's fucked. If your wife is abusing or fucking with your kids head bring it up in a group therapy session or something, what the hell does your wife do to "pass on" her BPD? PD's are never applied to people under the age of 18

Interesting thought.
But... I don't agree. Thanks for your input.

user, you knew how crazy your wife is, psychologist or no psychologist, cautious people don't come back to their troubled exes and then act all surprised when shit goes down again. And you own your daughter something, so maybe stop feeling sorry for yourself and try to help her. No surprise she's nuts if her mother is a legit head case and her father wants to pack up his shit and leave. Furthermore, if you knew your wife is cray-cray and her mental illness may pass on offspring, why have children?

have you thought that maybe your wife is just a bad influence on your daughter? I'd just say fuck it when it comes to your wife and all but I would think your daughter deserves a chance.

I'd only recommend something so drastic as an alternative to suicide.

Well you can't get rid of your daughter...so try to get rid of your wife, steal custody so you don't have to pay child support to your ex, and then deal with this brat for six more years. Or if you care only for yourself, leave them And pay child support to your dumb ex wife for six more years and move on.
It's your own retarded fault for remarrying someone you know is fucked.

this, OP.

That seems to be hindsight. Are you the same annon that said I can't spot the BPD in my daughter, now saying that I should have spotted the BPD in my wife even though her therapist told me she's all better now? I'm learning, user.
Yes, my daughter's therapists says her mother is a bad influence and the root cause of her problems.
Why would divorce and moving away to somewhere cheap that I could afford while paying child support be drastic?
When men try for custody, they get it only 1 out of 10 times.
I think I mentioned how her shrink said she was all better now.
Which do you agree with?
1) I can't spot BPD in my daughter.
2) It's my fault I didn't spot BPD in my ex wife despite her psychologist saying she was better.
Thanks...looking for solutions. Blame at this point doesn't really matter.

>my daughter's therapists says her mother is a bad influence and the root cause of her problems
use that against her

You mean in court, as in get my daughter's therapist to make a statement to the child custody court?
Even if I got custody, Wife will still get visitation and I won't be able to move somewhere cheap to live. 1st divorce she kept me from going back to school because I had custody.
And the wife would use the visitation to mooch even more off me; she will threaten not to feed them unless I bring a weekend's worth of food with them.
Then there's the dreaded 2 AM knock at the door thing where the police tell me to go pick up my kids cuz's mom's in custody.

If you don't believe you can save your daughter because she's also mentally fucked then do as said and live out your Nevada trailer living and whore fucking fantasy and pay child support to your dumb ex wife for six more years.

I'd get out just because it'll tear you-- the sane one-- apart. Although you did marry crazy so consider therapy kek
Just get out, maybe your story about the faulty bill of health will win you away from child support.

Is your older daughter free of the household? Leaving her in that dynamic would be cruel

Usually a therapist will talk to you and help you understand things about borderline. Borderline also has difference stages and can have different side conditions, like depression, schizoid personality disorder, etc. Since it's your family the treating therapist would be able to give you specific advise on things that you should do around your family and things you shouldn't and how to escape if that's necessary.
Talk to their shrink(s), tell him your issues and if he can help, he should be able to. Maybe you'll have a partner or family session.

Other than that, it's always good to have a place where you can cool off when things go weird.

>Yes, my daughter's therapists says her mother is a bad influence and the root cause of her problems.
You can use that in court against her. She's unfit to handle the child and increases chances of her having a meltdown. Should be an instant win unless your daughter prefers her mom, then you lost anyway and you can very well move to alaska in an igloo.

>Why would divorce and moving away to somewhere cheap that I could afford while paying child support be drastic?
Abandoning your child is a drastic action, at least in same countries and not Amerishart land where divorce is normalized.

If you leave your little girls life you’re gonna fuck her up even worse for countless years, what was the point in having a kid if you weren’t ready to deal with one? At least she isn’t a downy.

>No, she's not, and she passed on her borderline personality disorder to our daughter.

how did this happen, how did she behaved?

you should have been there for your daughter, take her to therapy she can still be saved.

>Or should I spend the rest of my miserable life fighting to save my daughter even tho' I know she's incurable?
Leave
Remember that BPD is not a biological chemical problem like schizophrenia that can be cured by a pill. It is a personality disorder. People act the way they do because it is adaptive for them, it makes them feel better.
In the case of BPD, it allows them to blame all problems on other people, therefore they think of themselves as "good" people regardless of how much they treat other people like shit.
You can't change people that don't want to change and BPD people rarely want to change
Leave and save yourself.