How do I gain more confidence?

How do I gain more confidence?

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Talk to people IRL
Take up self defence
Take up a team sport
Join a running club
Stay off social media

Tell me about your circumstances first/

I'm 19 in college and haven't spoken to a non-family member since leaving high school

this

to be more specific, talk to random people
stuff like asking staff how their day is going when they're serving you

also, stay in touch with distant family
call them occasionally just to ask how they are / what they're doing


but don't QUIT social media
a lot of people get invited through FB
(unfortunately, I'd love to be able to ditch FB without suffering social consequences)

try talking to people in your course
join a club of your interests

oof

is it more of a social phobia thing or what?

I don't think so. I've just so far haven't found myself in the situation

so do you actually lack confidence? would you talk to a girl you found attractive? would you make friends with people who have similar interests? or are you scared that they might react negatively so something you do or say?

The latter

27yo
Married with 1 kid and another on the way.
Probation worker, routinely talking to violent offenders, building a rapport as quick as possible to try and keep them from offending as long as possible, I can't flake or lose frame otherwise I'll be cunted off.

Rejection is a natural part of life, you won't get every job you apply for, some people won't like you and not every woman will be interested in you.
You can't not live your life because a woman might not like you.

well its irrational. i encourage you to go out and push the boundaries a little bit every now and then, and you will be surprised by how friendly people are :)

How do you know people are friendly?

because i talk to them. i work as a doorknocker and people are polite, even when they hate me. except the few that aren't but they act as contrast and make the nice people seem nicer.

You don't know the people around me

Don’t take yourself too seriously.

Do things you can feel proud of.

neither do you if you dont talk to them

>be me
>no confidence after toxic ex
>tried to fake being confident
>got involved with a girl
>she thinks i'm funny an attractive
>it dawns on her i have no confidence
>things get awkward
>dawns on me i bit off more than i could chew
>think i'm just gonna not talk to her again
>wtf was i thinking
>not ready for this shit
>the cycle continues

why did you stop faking your confidence?

20 Y/o

Hello Mates, I'm having trouble getting over an ex, and have a hard time looking further and seeing myself with another person. What should I do to just move on and have the will to get other girls ?

make a new thread, i need this advice too

I'm new to Jow Forums, don't know how...

Literally me

me_irl

Nofap

Fake it 'til you make it.

Its 3:30pm and I'm having my first beer.
I feel like this helps

it does. go to parties where everyone is having beers. things are easier that way. why do you think chad and stacey do that so much?

I mean things are kinda different in the country side, we just drink most of the day anyway.

But yeah I agree, I'm going out tonight and its the only time I talk to girls.
Worst part is when you sober up and you're still talking to them.

yeah bring enough too keep you confident for the whole time you wanna stay, dont have it all at once, leave when your done. the best bit is you learn from your drunk self how to be yourself and still be confident

I don't know man, I just got insecure maybe?
But fuck it, not gonna let that shit hold me back.
I had a few hours time out, had a sleep and now I'm ready to give it another go. Fuck my life I'm prettified..

not op but would like to know as well.
I'm 18 and have recently tried to become more extroverted. from a completely antisocial 14 year old who would eat lunch in the bathroom and wait for mom in the backstreet after school so nobody would see me, I've become friends with a lot of people and am now in multiple social circles. I've been working out quite a lot and a lot of girls say I'm very attractive. I just never manage to convince myself of this and even when I am absolutely certain that a girl would gladly bang me, I just fail to do anything because I'm not confident enough to face the consequences. I can spend hours in female company and even do borderline sexual things playfully, but as soon as it comes to flirting or actually getting to the point of doing something i get overwhelmed and switch to full autism.
People are surprised when I tell them I'm a virgin, but in truth I've never even kissed a girl...
I know I'm not gay and it's nothing like that, I've still just got the scar of my chronic social problems and all I need is a tiny step, I just don't know how to gain that confidence...

Hang in there kid, if you're working out & stuff now, give it a short while an you will have the ladies coming to you, no sweat. Just always try have a positive attitude my man, chicks dig that, and be funny of course.