How the fuck do I attend university with social anxiety?

How the fuck do I attend university with social anxiety?

It starts with getting to the place. 1 hour of commuting in packed public transport is horrible (+1h for getting home). I never liked the "where do I look so it's not awkward" game.

Arriving at university - even more fucking people.
I can't connect to my classmates(or anyone at all). The smalltalk situations are killing me - after one semester I'm running out of topics to talk about.
I think they started being annoyed by my lame presence. Trying but not being accepted is very demotivating. Why should I go through the horrors of commuting for this shit?
Rather stay at home.

Staying away from lectures is threatening my study success. I dropped out once already because of this.


Somehow I do manage to scrape through such a day. But every morning I'm struggling to get out of bed and do so. Now that summer approaches, it gets exponentially harder. I hate having to wear less clothes that expose my pathetic body. I don't like being around all the even more lively and happy people. I don't like being reminded how they enjoy the best time of the year (+best time of life according to some folks -university) while I have to post on some advice internet board hoping that my life is not a lost case scenario.

Drop your protips pls. will take obtainable drugs if necessary

Attached: lecture.jpg (1024x424, 151K)

It helps if you're in a stable relationship because you can focus on hitting your life goals together, which makes what everyone else thinks a lot less significant. But if that's not you, then I suggest drugs. I've always preferred stimulants.

>But if that's not you, then I suggest drugs.
I guess you have to make some specific suggestions because that's definitely not me.

I got over social anxiety by learning to detach and not give a fuck - just go numb

I can't even feel embarrassment anymore I'm so detached

Adderall

Grow up.

The more you avoid situations like this, the worse your fear of then will be. Put yourself out there and things will fall into place.

>just go numb
>I can't even feel embarrassment anymore I'm so detached
Oh, that's also what I do. When I said that I scrape through the day, that's what I meant.

Can't numb the loneliness or urge to drop everything though.

But for real though, OP. Adderall motivates you to take on shitty tasts.

okay thx
I'll check it out

You're thinking too much. Being too self conscious. No one their is paying attention to you and they're all just as wrapped up in themselves as you are about yourself. I wouldn't worry so much.

>Put yourself out there and things will fall into place.
This is not true. I've put myself out there often enough already. And still I struggle every morning and still I can't connect to other people.
In fact, I have tried so often that reading a bitch ass comment like yours makes me really mad. "grow up" is a meme advice just like "kill urself". 2 sides of the same shit-advice coin
faggot

>The smalltalk situations are killing me - after one semester I'm running out of topics to talk about.
>I think they started being annoyed by my lame presence.


First of all, focus on your fucking work. You'll have less time to worry about whether everybody likes you, you'll get better grades, and you'll have something to talk about with everybody in your classes.
> I don't like being around all the even more lively and happy people

Then ignore them. There are people there who are quieter and more studious. Spend time with them and ignore the Chads and Stacies.

>No one their is paying attention to you and they're all just as wrapped up in themselves as you are about yourself
This is false though?
I do pay attention to other people a lot and they most probably do so as well.

>I got over social anxiety by learning to detach and not give a fuck - just go numb

This helps. Also, focus on the failings and shortcomings of others. They aren't perfect, they're just as flawed as you are. Focus on them generally more. What are they doing? Are they fat? Do they have bad breath? Do they have trailer park grammar?

These people are no better than you, and in many cases they are a lot worse. Remember that.

You might want to take a look at your attitude. That seems to be the problem. You're always looking for the negative of everything.

>First of all, focus on your fucking work
And then what?
Finish university, get a job?
Experience the same struggles at work? Post another thread?

> and you'll have something to talk about with everybody in your classes.
My grades? I don't understand what you mean

> There are people there who are quieter and more studious
Yeah, they're lame losers just like me. Conversation with such people is even harder because they hardly contribute any conversation topics.
I suck at this as well, can't carry a whole fucking conversation myself

I kinda overcomed social anxiety by over-studing. It is like they say, 8 hours of study a day keeps the existential dread away.

Attached: aaaah.jpg (393x339, 36K)

>They aren't perfect, they're just as flawed as you are.
I am aware of that.
And yet they somehow do have friends and they always find something to talk about. And it seems these imperfect beings also enjoy coming to university and riding the public transport.

I'm fucking clueless.


>You're always looking for the negative of everything.
Yes, I do. And I found your "grow up" advice to be especially bad.

>>First of all, focus on your fucking work
>And then what?
>Finish university, get a job?
>Experience the same struggles at work? Post another thread?

Let's not get ahead of ourselves. You get through college and you can tackle work later. Part of what you're going to learn here at college is how to put up with all the assholes in the world. And 95% of the world is assholes. It's like anything else. After you put up with them for 4 years you're going to get better. Just grit your teeth and DO IT. This is the number one problem with people of your generation. I'm not picking on you, I'm trying to help you. Please. Just DO IT and it will get easier.

>> and you'll have something to talk about with everybody in your classes.

I'm talking about the subject. If you're taking Calculus you can talk with the other students about calculus. Iff you have a paper to write for English you can talk with the others about the paper. Or you can just talk about how the professor sucks and is an asshole. This is standard college conversation unless he's a good guy.

>My grades? I don't understand what you mean
>> There are people there who are quieter and more studious
>Yeah, they're lame losers just like me. Conversation with such people is even harder because they hardly contribute any conversation topics.


OK, you need to back up right there. If somebody talks to you and is your friend then by definition they are NOT lame losers. People who are nice to you are good people. People who are mean or offensive to you are lame losers. Don't forget that. You take friends where ever you can find them. The people who are studious and will talk to you, and who you get along with are the people you want in your life. You help them out with the conversation. Cut them slack. They cut you slack. This is what is called friendship.
>I suck at this as well, can't carry a whole fucking conversation myself

>8 hours of study a day keeps the existential dread away.
Ah yes, that's what I'm slowly getting into as well. But can't study all the time and the smallish breaks in between lectures and commuting just break me.

I think you didn't got what I mean. I was talking about how studing like a madman made me overthink a little less about other things and now I can talk to people with less stress.
But this probably only works for me, so don't trust me on that.

>Please. Just DO IT and it will get easier.
yeah okay, and if I force university and nothing changes then I'll fucking DO IT and off myself baka
you're really trying to bait me here innit?


>I'm talking about the subject. If you're taking Calculus you can talk with the other students about calculus. Iff you have a paper to write for English you can talk with the others about the paper. Or you can just talk about how the professor sucks and is an asshole.
This is what I do to survive smalltalk. It's not really a solution to my troubles.


>and will talk to you
sometimes I think these quiet types only talk to me out of courtesy or because they want to remain in good terms with me since being around each other in lectures often

>This is what is called friendship.
Actually, I consider them only friends if hanging out outside of university as well. I don't feel comfortable to ask other people to hang out with a lame ass like myself though and ofc they never ask me as well.
>studing like a madman made me overthink a little less about other things
yeah okay, I'm not on that level of madness lol

The grow up advice isn't bad. You obviously haven't found anything better. Your own fear keeos you from doing the things to need to do in order to become a functioning adult.

I can relate so bad :((

no

There are books on social anxiety written by clinical psychologists. Work hard on this but have some patience.

Get over that shit. Everybody else had to. Hell you went to some school before this and it had people.

>There are books on social anxiety written by clinical psychologists
Any suggestions?
I assume you mean simple therapy guides instead of scientifically written descriptions.


>Hell you went to some school before this and it had people.
Yes! And it was the same as now!

I hated public transport and tried to stick to some people in the breaks which I never really succeeded at. In my freetime I lurked Jow Forums and neglected homework.

This kinda blows my mind right now. Years have passed and I have hardly changed at all.