Okay, so I have this transgender friend. Gonna call him a him because he has a fucking dick and guys have dicks.
I was initially accepting of him because I'd been exposed to enough pro-trans stuff that I was just like "Alrighty, if that's today's politically correct, then cool". He didn't even get anything but I've taken this guy into Victoria's Secrets and places like that even or just walked around with him while he looked at girl's clothes to make it look like it was for me (femanon) or that I was helping him buy it for a girlfriend. TLDR I supported this dude and his identity or whatever the fuck this week's word for it is.
However, after some repeated thought, hearing opposing sides, and analyzing the mental reasoning behind this, I just can't see this shit making any sense, and am disgusted that even professional mental health agencies are undermining exactly how much of a mental health issue it is. I mean shit, I'm mentally ill myself (not a trans person though) and can see that there's enabling something and then treating/not-enabling what is literally a mental illness. I'm not saying there's reason to shame him or anyone for having this illness, it's not like they can help it, and hell, I LOVE traps, I don't even find anything wrong with gays/, but I'm done enabling him and these people that literally think that gender and sex aren't the same thing and would get triggered by the Pokemon "Are you a boy or a girl?" question in the beginning of the game.
Honestly it doesn't seem like you're even really thinking about it. On one hand, you're saying it's clearly a mental illness, on the other you're saying it's people who want to choose their gender like a character in a game. You seem confused more than anything.
Ryder Ward
Fpbp
Logan Gonzalez
If you're still buying his clothes, then there's more going on than his "identity". The fact is that trans people accept themselves as the opposite sex. If "she" wanted big-girl panties "she" would buy them "herself".
Your friend is some weird manipulative shithead who doesn't know what they want. You shouldn't let his behavior tint your worldview against a whole class of people. Not all black people are gangster thugs, not all white people are cross burning wizards, not all trans people trick other people into buying their underwear for them.
(cont., was getting a fucking connection error on desktop for some reason )
I could keep going on, but moreso TLDR, what am I to do if they try to discuss something I don't support anymore? I'm in a Discord chat with him and some other trans people too and it just feels really uncomfortable to see them enabling each other about a literal mental illness.
Cooper Young
Support him in being what he is. But when he says he's going to cut his dick off and turn it into a "vagina" you tell him that's a terrible idea. If he doesn't listen to you cut him out of your life.
Angel Russell
What I was trying to say is that they'd potentially (keyword: potentially) be triggered by something so simple.
Other than some cheap nail polish I never bought him any girly stuff, I just used to go with him to ease the tension.
Also holy fuck if only I could've said this earlier, Hiro what is going on:
I'm not looking for anyone to change my stance, that isn't gonna happen, so not going to reply to anything else like that. In fact, I'm trying to be less of a dick and not [pretend?] I'm enabling him, when really I don't support that side of him any longer. I'm not even saying I don't want to be friends if that's possible, but I want to stop enabling a literal mental illness.
Bentley James
I guess finding a psychoanalisist would be good, but I dont know if there are any good ones left. AFAIK this kind of behavior is most likely result of some event that disrupted his development during childhood. While his behavior is wrong, remember that most likely this isn't his fault that he is the way he is. Saying that, I would not enable him by buying dresses. Contacting a professional would be my bet.
Liam Nguyen
I know it's not his fault, it's not anyone's. I don't know if he actually has it or not since by his description it sounds like they just gave it to him without much question, but I do know he used to be on some asperger's or anger medication as a kid, so I'm sure there's a lot of overlapping things going on with him.
Honestly I'm not sure if I should recommend him a professional or not, I'd hate for them to just enable him further. There's accepting something can't be fixed for one, but then there's enabling. I'm not even saying I wanna even recommend him a conversion[?] therapist, but I'd rather it'd be someone that wouldn't just immediately go "Wow that must be hard. But you are a girl. Here's some places you can get HRT at which I know your unemployed ass can't afford but is totally the best way to make you feel like you "are" ".
Brayden Rodriguez
I don't know enough about this topic, hence pro recomendation, but I do agree that if you were to consult specialist, there is a need to take whatever he says with grain of salt. Perhaps some psychoanalists from the history had wrote about this issue, so you can try there.
Lucas Ward
I was going to say something like it sounds like she is getting you to do stuff for her that she doesn't have to but you aren't even doing that anymore. I'm not actually sure what burden this is for you except for the cognitive dissonance.
>enabling a mental illness so what? everyone's addiction to stimulants is enabled all the time anyway and is respecting the way someone with OCD arranges their room really enabling them? So she's got a penis and probably still looks like a man, that doesn't mean you are somehow compelled to do what exactly, not use her pronouns? if that's really a struggle for you then you shouldn't be in her life at all.
Also if she's trans chances are she has some attachment issues so it will feel better to explain to her that she needs help and you can't provide it, also that trying to provide it means hurting you and since / if she cares about you at all then she will stop trying to hurt you. If she thinks you care about her she has the wrong idea, so maybe have a conversation about how she's not seeing you for who you are, because you've been lying to her?
if this is your concern then a good therapist (especially occupational) will help her budget for what she can afford rather than throwing money/time away without any sense of care or priority.
but remember she's buying hormones she can't afford because she will probably kill herself if she doesn't, and its also possible that her insurance pays for them.
also medicine for aspergers doesn't exist and therapy treatment usually doesn't help, the best thing for people with aspergers is to ask other people with aspergers who are at least somewhat successful for advice.
William Gutierrez
>So she's got a penis and probably still looks like a man, that doesn't mean you are somehow compelled to do what exactly, not use her pronouns? if that's really a struggle for you then you shouldn't be in her life at all.
Literal craziness. But it's also everyday craziness. So now everybody has to act crazy and pretend like it's sane.
Nicholas Ross
Not going to try to change your mind but can you just tell me what you think the alternative should be? Can you think of a solution for your friend that isn't likely to cause them more harm than just letting them pretend to be a girl?
Caleb Ross
Just do what most girls do and leave the chat and start ghosting him Geez dint over think it. If you want no part in it dont participate. Its simple
Sebastian Bailey
I don't know how to reconcile this either.
Sometimes I hear stories from transwomen describing how much they hate the sight of their own penis, or from transmen on how much they hate their tits. I'm sure it's different bcuz "society" but is it so different from hating say, the shape your chin? Perhaps you were born with a protruding brow ridge, or gigantic nose or something. For some cosmetic surgery is an option but there's always support for "accepting who you are". How have those words become so damaging?
Xavier Bell
>being friends with a trans person
That was your first mistake. They have a serious mental condition, they think they're something they are not and can NEVER be so they essentially don't even exist. Cut all contact asap
Josiah Walker
You realize that while dysphoria is a mental illness, the "cure" is transitioning, right? If you were a good friend, you'd support her.
Jaxson Jackson
Quit fucking complaining and stop being friends with this person. None of your griping is necessary or constructive. It would take less effort to move on with your life than it would to come here and type this wall of sarcastic garbage. You go your way, he goes his. End of story.
Gavin Gonzalez
Treatment is transitioning, there is no cure
Lincoln Cox
yup
"I have a friend..."
You're not her friend. Just dead stop hanging out with them, she deserves better than you.
Bail before he comes out as a "lesbian" and tries to fuck you.
Christopher Miller
There are some born with the wrong genitals. There are also some really mentally and emotionally fucked up people and the trans shit is just the latest "look at me" symptom of their underlying problem.
I know transgender people in other parts of the world and they do not suck the oxygen out of the room nor want special treatment and sure as fuck do not demand everybody play along with their delusion. They just are. Some can easily pass and some cannot but they don't get butthurt by others confusion. There is no flag waving, chant or political agenda.
Sounds like your friend is one of those that want you to be a member of HIS cult so I suggest since it makes you uncomfortable you stop being around him.
Christian Johnson
Yes absolutely.
People tend to forget FACTS on this matter.
It’s a FACT that if you’re born with a dick that you’re a boy
It’s a FACT that no matter how many pills you take and surgeries you go through, you will always be a boy.
It’s a FACT that if a boy went through a 100% transition procedure to girl, if someone took a sample of his DNA and cloned him, his clone would be a boy.
This is absolutely a mental health issue, and it’s wrong we are enabling this. These people need help. Not being encouraged to continue into delusion
Ignore the obvious SJW posts OP I also have a friend who at first thought he was transgender After talking to him a lot it turns out he just was "misguided" and needed to find justification because he actually was bi I cured him of the tranny disease and he now lives a healthier life and has a boyfriend
Julian Powell
I 100% sympathize with everything you've said here. Encouraging and enabling your friend's behavior is very much akin to entertaining the delusions of a schizophrenic and I would be just as conflicted in handling the situation. The LGBT+ narrative pushing so-called "acceptance" of this entirely irrational and completely self destructive mental illness is nothing short of dangerous, feel-good, pseudoscientific propaganda. Those buying into the cult of trans "acceptance" will be quick to dismiss your valid concerns as some sort of neo-hitler hatemongering rhetoric solely because you would rather stay in touch with reality and have these individuals seek proper psychiatric help than play into their distorted perceptions of themselves and cause potentially irreversible damage.
Daniel Brown
This.
Friendship is putting up and supporting their dumb delusions about life because life is short and painful and you like the person they are. I think my fundie Christian friends are retarded and ass-backwards. I have a couple of pro-Commie anti-fa friends too, and I also think they're braindead. But all of them are my friends and are legitimately good and fun people, and therefore I support them. Having empathy is great.
Levi Johnson
OP just tell the guy in a calm way that you don't believe he's being healthy and that you suggest that he'd be happier if he actively tried to change himself. Don't bring up a psych right away but just steer him in the right direction. If he throws a fit because of that just drop his ass, You're a bunch of fucking retards and should go back to the shithole you crawled out from.
