I need some relationship Jow Forums! I've been with boyfriend for almost 4 years now. I love him very much. He's the best person I could ever be with, he gives me all the attention I could ever need and whatever. We've been living together for 3 years.
So this guy added me on steam, and wanted to play with me. Ok, alright. We began talking more and more. We became good friends. He lives 4000 km away, so not a threat really.. He gave me a lot of compliments and I knew he kinda liked me alot. I did get some feelings for him, but didn't really act upon it. Never gave him alot of compliments back compared to what he gave me. I added him on Whatsapp without my BF knowing. We didn't talk sexual (except for a sexual dream i had long time ago). He jokes about getting a boner when I play certain characters. I just respond with something like "everyone does" or something.
So, my boyfriend asked me if I talked to any of my steam friend beside steam, and I told him the truth. He opened my phone and saw the last messages we sent, nothing special. Just some harmless flirting.
I feel really guilty for keeping it a secret from my boyfriend. I don't feel guilty the way we talked together.
So I ended my friendship with the guy. He keeps messaging my friends, telling me how much he misses me. Today, 2 days after we stopped talking he sent me a message, saying I'm worth more than this, that we should continue to be friends.
Only problem is, my boyfriend is not happy with this, and I'm not allowed to have him as a friend, even though I said he could monitor my chats with him..
You're interested in this guy. You flirted with him and he flirted with you (harmlessly, but still). You gave him your phone number. You kept it a secret.
I get that your boyfriend is upset, and doesn't want you to be friends. If you respect your boyfriend, you should avoid texting this guy and work on your relationship instead.
Hudson Sullivan
If you respect your be in the slightest, it shouldn't be hard to cut this guy from your life.
Gabriel Morgan
>harmless flirting
You admittedly flirted with another man while you’re in a relationship. It makes sense why your boyfriend is upset
Julian Hughes
Its not harmless when he tells you his dick gets hard because of you and you allow it to continue.
Its not a friendship but a budding relationship when you know his intentions, you talk about his genitals and he starts to shit talk your bf by planting a seed your bf is being oppressive for being uncomfortable with your secret crush.
You enjoy the flattery, encouraged it to continue outside Steam by adding him, hid it from your bf and continue to this day. YOU need to make a decision and not blame this on your unsuspecting bf. Its not fair that you and your "friend" are shit talking him behind his back.
Andrew Barnes
Are you fucking retarded? Seriously OP, are you? you flirted with another guy and then say "everything is alright" ?!
Eli Martin
>I did get some feelings for him This isn't innocent OP
Sebastian Turner
You gotta cut it off.
Apologize to the guy, tell him you're unavailable and very much in love.
Don't blame your boyfriend, make it clear it's your choice.
Brayden Gutierrez
flirting is natural. don't listen to the guys here that are just projecting their own fears and insecurities. what they mean is that since you went this far it may show that you are feeling somehow unsatisfied in your relationship. I would work on that aspect, instead of hiding it or ignoring it. go on a few "dates" with your bf, do some adrenaline fulled activity to bring new sparks in your relationship, etc. don't just assume that "i got moist from some dude"="i want to be free and cheat on my bf". we are human.
Adrian Mitchell
You're response is just as stupid as every one else's. You're literally just assuming she's unsatisfied and there's nothing wrong with what she's doing.
People get attracted to others even while in good relationships. What matters is how you handle that.
Grayson Smith
>You are response
I'm also stupid don't mind me
Cooper Sullivan
this is why relationships are the most annoying part of life. any advice or suggestion is irrelevant if it doesnt match the person. maybe she is unsatisfied, maybe she is confused, maybe she did nothing wrong and her bf is an ungrateful, unloving prick, maybe she is a slut and asking for absolution. I just assume Jow Forums chick are of higher caliber than instagram hoes. :P
Matthew Smith
>I just assume Jow Forums chick are of higher caliber than instagram hoes. :P
Jow Forums chicks probably suffer from depression and anxiety like most of the dudes on here such as myself.
In these exercises, I put myself in their shoes. If I were flirting with a girl and keeping it secret, how would my girlfriend feel?
Of course your man doesn't want you near him. Why do you want him near? He's flirting despite presumably knowing you're taken? Like he's talking about his dick honey, what do you THINK he wants from you? A poetry slam? A thought-out prose on the state of internet socializing and how it has atrophied us beyond repair? Perhaps a dissertation on why the internet was 'too much, too soon' or maybe our Pandora's Box?
Fucksake's.
Approach objectively and provide advice that is catch-all (such as, when confronting a situation, empathize and envision it from the other end to better understand how to present yours-- DEBATING 101 FUCKSAKES) Chicks and dudes on Jow Forums are in the same boats-- either so miserable the darkness here just fits, or else so starved for attention that anything goes like it does here. So I just ignore that and try for the most general advice I can get
Jacob Turner
>Debating 101
I wish my high school had debating classes
Camden Nguyen
Mine didn't, I just had four older siblings (two brothers, two step-brothers) that would contentedly remind me of how dumb and vapid I was if I was ever dumb or vapid. It got to the point that nobody would have discussions with me because I got too good at rooting people in their own shit and making them feel like shit Now my own family will basically talk over me if things get anywhere near a debate. I usually excuse myself from the table if I feel the Ol' Debate Joint working up. If I see people being facetious or faulty in arguments I have to put my nose in, it's usually a willful resistance not to point out stupidity; I've just become so prickly and annoyed by it now because being fucking spittle and venom about it to myself was the only way I overcame it. And thank Christ, I'd hate to be one of the sad sacks of shit nowadays that has to have a Discord hugbox for everything. I quit messengers after MSN went kaput.
"Ignorance is bliss."
Wyatt Green
this is emotional cheating, I don't know why you don't see anything wrong with it because it is so wrong. as soon as you catch feelings for someone you have to cut them off OR break up with your boyfriend. can't have your cake and eat it too, and you SHOULD feel guilty
Christopher Rivera
OP is long gone, I wouldn't be shocked if this were bait or if she fully intended to keep on with the guy in secret. I have no idea why a girl would want to be around a guy who talks about his dick all the time other than to want a crack at that dick.
Thomas Bennett
I gotta question what you think about general advice because from my experience it doesn't seem to help anyone too much.
Though on a side note, what you said reminds me of myself a bit. I've been calling my own mother out on bullshit she's done when I was young and all of her facetious or faulty arguments I cleave right though. But what I realized is despite how right I can be no one will listen to you unless they want to. Espicially narcissistic people
Joseph Clark
yeah, and such a bad decision if she picks the guy over her boyfriend. wasting four years with someone who she said is the best person she could ever have to go risk it with someone who she is most likely just infatuated with... OP don't do it! you'll most likely regret it, go fix your relationship with your boyfriend instead because if you're catching feelings for somebody else there is probably something going on
Gabriel Stewart
You're untrustworthy. Gain it back. If you get defensive it's just going to give him the wrong idea.
Jose Martin
>gamer sluts Not even once
Sebastian Harris
>nothing special. Just some harmless flirting >In a relationship for 4 years >flirting with someone else >harmless no
Be friends with him if you want but that kind of stuff hurts to see
If you respect hime enough it shouldn't be that hard to stop texting someone to flirt on the side
Jayden Lewis
Yes, I am interested in this guy. I'm not gonna deny it. I miss him more as a friend than a crush.
He tells me his dick gets hard, what can I do? I feel unfomertable when he did it, which he did once. Most of my friendships end in bad intentions from their side. This time I took the bait, stupid enough.
I very much agree with this. I'm a naturally flirty person. Thing is - I feel like I had to hide it when I added him on Whatsapp. Before I added him, we talked about he was not OK with me adding anyone from Steam anywhere else. Well, I don't agree..
DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER? No, but really. Never said my gender anywhere. I could be a shemale with a dick for all you care. I could be gay. Whatever.
I would be pissed if my boyfriend did this to me. Mostly for hiding it from me. I wouldn't control him and make him cut contact with anyone. He has to make that decision himself. He made a joke once about getting a boner..
>I have no idea why a girl would want to be around a guy who talks about his dick all the time other than to want a crack at that dick. He made one joke.
Well, my boyfriend and I have worked things through. Of course I "chose" him. I'm not gonna waste everything we have together and our future.
I want to be friends with him, but I'm basically not allowed to.
