Why does no one fucking respect me?

>Whatever I am doing wrong must be so slight and subtle that it is impossible to identify, then
No, it isn't. Now you're rubbing ME the wrong way, because you're assuming that since you don't know the answer, nobody knows the answer.

Don't give your bullies power by acknowledging and spending even a second of rational thought on their words or actions. They don't matter. Truly.

OP people in this world are all shitty and feel like their only worth is gained by putting down others. They will never stop trying to put you down, you just have to learn to ignore it. Being comfortable in your own skin and not letting the haters get you down is the only way to win and gain respect. But don't ever assume you deserve respect, respect must be earned.

Well, to give more depth, the reason I say this is because people give me conflicting signs all the time. Often complete opposite signs.

Examples:
>A girl who once used to follow me everywhere and liked all my social media posts. She also once gave me a big speech about how “I’m an amazing guy” and that “everyone thinks I’m cool”. Then she stopped liking my social media posts, barely speaks to me anymore, and ignores me if we walk past each other at college
>Despite that girl saying “everyone thinks I’m cool” the vibe people in our mutual social circle give off is that I’m very much not cool
>I get invited to about half the parties my acquaintances host but the other half I am inexplicably not invited to
>People are really friendly to me when they’re drunk and gush about how cool I am. Then when they’re sober they never speak to me, or when they do they’re cold and unfriendly
>A couple girls once told me I was hot but I have never once been flirted with by a girl at a party. One time I tried flirting and got laughed at as if I was doing it embarrassingly wrong
>Several people who used to like every photo I posted on Instagram now don’t like any of my photos ever

So are you confrontational when guys try to fuck with you?

>Being a high school bullying victim means I am permanently damaged, I’m afraid. I need validation from others to heal my wounds. After 7 years of people at school telling me “you’re a piece of shit” I need at least 7 years of people telling me the exact opposite to bring my brain back to normal.
>The bullies robbed me. I might never have a normal life because of them.

I smell victim mentality. Stop that shit. You're not even sure what you want. You say respect, but then you talk about social presence and women being attracted to you. Those aren't all the same..

You didn't have it any worse than a lot of people. You just didn't handle it very well. I'll give you the same advice I give everybody. Stop being the fucking victim and start being the author of your life.

That means you can't cry anymore about how badly you were bullied in high school. High school is over. You are making your own life every day now. Decide what it is your goal is. If it is truly respect then you have to do something to earn it. Get high grades and become an expert on something. Start a business and work your fucking ass off to make it succeed. You'll notice that getting respect usually involves working to actually ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING.

If you want social facility that's different. I can't tell you how to do that. Respect may be a component of that, but there's more to it than that. Again, you usually have to WORK and ACCOMPLISH something.

Women being attracted to you? Again, that's not the same as respect. Respect COULD BE an element of attracting women, but not necessarily. How many women who interest you would be attracted to say Stephen Hawking ? They might respect him because he was smart, but they wouldn't want to fuck him.

You don't just dress different and act different and get respect. Respect is given to people who walk the walk, not just talk the talk.

>Being a high school bullying victim means I am permanently damaged, I’m afraid. I need validation from others to heal my wounds. After 7 years of people at school telling me “you’re a piece of shit” I need at least 7 years of people telling me the exact opposite to bring my brain back to normal.
>The bullies robbed me. I might never have a normal life because of them.

Yeah, no you robbed yourself of your own ability to do anything because you want to revel in your weakness, instead of accepting the conditions you have and resolving to do something about them.

This is a fun game for a lot of people. They don't amount to anything because they can always find some thing or some person to blame for their problems. That gives them the excuse they were looking for not to do the work day in and day out to get what they want.

But you know that's probably not your fault either. Psychological research shows traits like perseverance and doggendness and dedication to goals in the face of challenges - grit in short - is somewhat biologically determined. You obviously don't have it, so there's your excuse you are looking for not to try.

I’ve been a bully victim from middle school thru highschool, nobody robbed you of anything. You just gave meaning to meaningless words and people.

Reading what you wrote and how you get invited to parties etc, makes me wonder if you’re not just a spoiled brat. I get invited in 0 parties, 0. I couldn’t give a damn, I’m happy as it is and people don’t treat me like garbage, instead it’s the opposite. People talk to me because i treat them like people, not like assholes because of grudges i hold.

Strip away from your chains and learn to leave your past behind, only then you’ll change and have the respect you seek.

I knew a guy in college that started out in my friend group freshman year. We thought he was cool at first and would go out to parties together, but as we got to know him better we liked him less and less. He was clingy, paranoid about what others thought about him and would constantly ask things like "why didn't so and so talk to me today". It was apparent that he was in his own head a lot, and most of the slights he percieved were fabricated. This wore down on all of his friends that used to think he was cool, and we stopped inviting him to hang out and eventually told him we didn't want to live with him the next year.

This anecdote isn't to tell you that you're experiencing the same things that this person did, but to demonstrate that some people seem cool upon meeting them, but aren't as fun as expected once you get to know them better.

No one ever tries to fuck with me outright. I’m British, people here don’t do that. Even dudes here are passive aggressive and speak behind your back. I can’t exactly start biting people out for small transgressions like ignoring me in conversation. It’d just make it worse.

In all honesty I don’t have many hang ups about being bullied. My life is a lot better now. 16 year old me would be ecstatic with joy if he knew what kind of life I lead now. BUT when I look at the flaws there are in my life, I do think they pretty much all are rooted in me being bullied. If I wasn’t bullied I wouldn’t be so awkward, insecure and unstable.

For me, respect involves lots of things. I believe women don’t like me because they don’t respect me. They look at me and see a frail boy, not a confident man. I can’t seem to override that image.

Stephen Hawking actually got plenty of female attention. Didn’t he seduce one of his caretakers?

Everything’s relative. Once upon a time I got invited to zero parties too. But now I’ve had a taste, I want it all.

I want to be the big shot. The coolest and most respected guy. The leader. The one people look up to. It’s always been my dream. Since I was a boy. It breaks my heart that it’ll never happen to me.

You’ve given me no advice as to how to avoid it.

Since hawking is in the middle of this: look at him. How many problems do you think he had? Now compare them to yours. You’re pretty lucky, aren’t you? But the real question is: did Steven fucking Hawking let his problems and disabilities stop him from becoming one of the most influencing and respected man of the last century? Did his problems stop him from getting married twice and p, as you said, seduce his caretaker?

Now think about this and stop whining, go make something out of your miserable life

Do you think I don’t try?

I only posted this thread because I’m at a bit of a loss at the moment. I feel like I’ve hit a brick wall. I’ve tried hard to be confident and suppress the bad thoughts but I’m still not getting the respect and attention I desire from my peers.

Most of all I’m still fucking sad that those girls ignored me when I said hi the other day. Why do that to someone you’ve spoken to dozens of times? Just why?

>You’ve given me no advice as to how to avoid it.
I know, because I don't have any because I don't know you or your personality. I'm just trying to help you understand why you're experiencing these things from other people - they thought you were cool, they got to know you, they didn't like you when they got to know you. You need to find someone in your personal life who can help you identify your undesirable behaviors and teach you how to empathize.

I don’t have anyone who can do that.

One of the consequences of being someone like me is that I don’t actually have any close friends. I have some friends and many acquaintances, but no close people I can confide in.

Therapy didn’t quite work for this purpose either. They just told me that it was all in my head and that I needed to ignore it. Which doesn’t address the root issue

>>You’ve given me no advice as to how to avoid it.

The fucking advice is simple. You want respect, you have to earn it. By doing something, not by wearing Axe cologne and dressing nice and actiing alpha. You have to do something.

Near as I can tell you haven't done shit. Truthfully, I don't respect you and I've never even met you. You know why? Because you're a whiner crybaby who just wants to whine and whine and whine. I respect a guy with a real problem who asks for advice, gets it, and says OK, I'll give it a shot. Or no, I think you're wrong.

I don't respect a fucking whiny pussy who just wants to say but my feelz, but my pussy hurtz, but I can't, but, but but

>Most of all I’m still fucking sad that those girls ignored me when I said hi the other day. Why do that to someone you’ve spoken to dozens of times? Just why?

Fucking girls do this shit all the time pussy. Are you a faggot or what? Ignore them. This is what women do. You fucking faggot. They're cunts, this is the way they behave.

I’ve done plenty of things. I’m an actor, I play sports, I’ve taken leadership positions at college. What is it that you want me to do? Tell me and I will give it a shot.

It’s funny that none of the people I actually know who are popular and respected do any more “things” than I do. They just are more canny at playing the social game than me. For whatever reason people are willing to tolerate their flaws but not mine

It doesn't need to be a best friend. Just anybody. Pick one person in your current friend group that you have at least an ounce of trust in and tell them this (in your words):
>I don't recognize when I'm saying something that makes people uncomfortable or pisses people off
>I want to be better and more agreeable
>When we're altogether and I do something wrong, can you tip me off or give me feedback so I can correct it?
If it sounds cringy it's because it is, but your alternative is no friends, right? It's a win-draw situation

It's all in perspective. Why do you seek approval from shitty people, user?

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Oh, right, you’re just trying to peddle gay ass red pill philosophy to me.

Not interested. I don’t want to be some American right-wing keyboard warrior. I want to live and be successful in the real world. Going around believing women are cunts isn’t going to do me any favours, is it?

I can do that, yeah. Will try it next time I’m with a friend.

They’re not shitty people. No one else believes they’re shitty people. All the guys and girls I complain about ignoring me are people who others widely refer to as “nice” and “friendly”.

>What is it that you want me to do? Tell me and I will give it a shot.

You need to figure that out for yourself dipshit. I'm not you. I don't know what you want respect FOR.

I keep telling you, but you keep ignoring it, respect is given FOR SOMETHING YOU DO. I have no fucking idea what you want to do. When you figure it out do it, do it well, sacrifice to do it well and people will respect you for it.

Now fuck off

I've dealt with people who seemed nice and friendly and they can be the worst two-faced person possible. Just walk away if they don't acknowledge you.

Dude you've said nothing constructive at all
Take your namefag shit off

Op i think you need to stop writing and start reading the multitude of advices in this thread. You’re just embarassing yourself at this point

>Op i think you need to stop writing and start reading the multitude of advices in this thread. You’re just embarassing yourself at this point

This is one of those people who will whine for hours and come up with every excuse under the sun. It's much like a child that gives excuses to a parent for why he can't do things, and the parent accepts them. In fact, I suspect that's where he learned this pattern. It's a waste of time to engage with such people until they get over their victim/child role mentality.

You would feel the same way if you spent your entire life being degraded and humiliated by people on a routine basis.

Okay listen up you pussy what you gotta do is suck all of the bullies dicks and then grab a huge ass moby huge dick and shove it up their ass

They may, or they may have taken an alternative route and fought back at some point.

I don't know you but you seem a lot like someone I know very well, and his problem is that he doesn't have a backbone. He doesn't have any conviction behind his words, he doesn't stand for anything. He's successful but has no friends, and not because he doesn't want them but he can't hold anyone's interest because he's not interesting. Does this sound like you?

×××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××
Dude you are taking yourself too seriously
Nobody respects nobody nobody care for nobody
No one will fucking salute you neither will you salute anyone
People only care about what they can get from you be it lols or solved homework call it value
Consider what you are putting on the table and consider what you want in return
If you always seek shit and you don't give shit in return then you aien't worth shit to people
I mean why are you trying to impress people anyway do you work in show biz or something?

One of the quick fixes is learning sarcasm people LOVE to hear sarcasm because it makes them laugh
Watch george calin and pewdiepie on YouTube for reference

It all boils down to
Go out more Get craped on more till you learn
The faster you do this and the more intense the faster you get rid of your problem
And when you feel FUCKED after the mental burning go and sleep
Confident people become confident because they had to deal with more people and their shit than you
And stop with the respect shit
EMBRACE THE CRINGE

>guys, give me advice on something that can't be solved online
>*anons contribute advice*
>your advice sucks lmao
>I'm the only person who has ever been bullied
>why won't anyone help me?
Can't imagine why people ignore you in conversation.

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There is no THE LEADER
There is a leader for every situation
In every situation when you know what to do and people don't they have to follow you
Cut the being cool shit already it's retarded
What are you a ten years old kid?
Boo i gotz the bullied ..now i criez
So what you got fucking bullied it means shit now yeah you were weak before
For your information all kids are weak
Get the meanest most nastiest bully in front of you now i bet you can kick his ass because he is a small kid
You were a tiny wuss of kid once and got your ass kicked so what

The dude needs to get laid fast
He should try his grandmas anus

Fuck you're gay user. Weird delusions of grandeur and shit. you want to 'win' social situations and 'be in charge'? Yikes.

>Why does no one fucking respect me?

Because you have the personality of that little pissed off at the world sun in your photo.

At least he admits it.
Subconsciously, you act like that too. We all do

>It’s like I’m playing life on very hard mode while everyone else is on easy.
You sound like such a faggot mate. Get over yourself.

You might be perceiving slights that aren't actually happening... None of what you mentioned is a direct assault to you, it's possible that you only imagine these things were done on purpose. Are you maybe expecting too much respect from people, maybe idealizing how things should go in a social context?
Being bullied certainly played a part, but maybe it's you who is seeing and projecting all this weakness instead of the people around you.

Lol this board is so miserable. Here is a common theme:
>OP has deep issue that no one less than a therapist can practically solve
>people respond with reactionary/bad advice
>OP gets annoyed that aren't being helped
>people respond by mocking the original issue >OP gets more annoyed, justifying the lack of help they received, which they didn't deserve anyway
You see how this situation is counterproductive?

>You see how this situation is counterproductive?

Who the fuck are you Dr. Phil? I actually see some fairly good advice given out to a lot of people here. I also see a bunch of recalcitrant assholes who want to say oh, but I can't because this, or that, or the other thing.

Maybe a real psychologist who was getting $250 an hour would pat the little patient on the head and say there, there. But here nobody's getting paid. If you aren't serious about seeking advice, people tend to get irritated and let you know.

I'm sure your grand meta-commentary about the state of the board really helped OP. Well done signaling that virtue from your high horse. The OP hasn't taken any responsibility for the state he finds himself in and seems to prefer blaming things on externalities. What precisely do you want people to do about that?

You fix people by giving them the tools to succeed, but they have to put in the effort themselves. You can tell every 400 lb. person on Jow Forums about nutrition and exercise, but they aren't going to shed a single ounce unless they take control, and don't blame their situations on the fucking invisible aether or miasma.

Looks like you've entirely missed the point. This thread has ended up being a great case study on human nature, full of virtue signalling, opportunism and trying to destroy rather than create.

What is wrong with you people? Especially the namefags, but virtually all of you. Why are you on an advice board to shit on less fortunate people in vulnerable positions? You ought to be ashamed of yourselves.

>Aaaaaaaah no one respects me
>I don't go the gym
> I have bad posture
>I wear shitty clothes
>I don't make eye contact
>I flap my wrists like wet socks

Gee, mate, I fucking wonder why no one respects you

There is definitely something about how you act or think and then how people perceive you. You probably do not seem approachable or confident from other people's perspective. I know because I used to be unable to Garner respect. As much as a joke as the sounds you need to be more dominant in the social scene. If people ignoring you repeat yourself, if someone bumps into you let them know. If you see someone you want to speak to go up to speak to him. Eye contact good posture. As much as it sounds like a joke these are some things that can start changing how people see you

Sorry mate let me put some time aside to help someone who obviously does not want it.

You are a tool. You dont believe in your self, you arent taking care of your own business, you just want to come at everyone for not being perfect. Fuck off with your bullshit, bury yourself in your business and your work and maybe then you will be respected.

probably your parents being selfish and making you feel inferior your entire life

you should cut them out

It sounds like you lack empathy. You need to level with people a bit, nobody cares how confident or charismatic you are.

It should be said that life is very hard for everybody. I used to think like you too somewhat in my late teens. But meet and get to know enough people, and you find out that it isn’t easy for anyone. And for those who are socially apt and lovely to be around, they take for granted that they are that way, and I mean take for granted in its truest sense. They have no idea what it’s like NOT to be “respected,” and probably don’t wake up every day going, “oh Golly I’m so charismatic and every day is like I’m walking on cloud 9!” Peope fixate on their own problems like perhaps their family relationships, addiction to alcohol, lack of fulfillment in their career, etc.

Tldr stop being such faggot

impossible to identify, yet everyone else can notice it kek