Life going down the Mariana trench

user what do you want in life?

I don't know what I want in life, I just feel useless and even like that I don't have motivation to be useful.

What do you think is the happiest state of man?

I don't know. Having no problems or have solved most of the problems, maybe?

Well, when were you most happy in your life?

You should just kys.

But on a more serious note, dude if you keep saying you don't have any motivation then of course you're not gonna do shit.
Looking at the state of your family right now isn't doing anything to motivate you?
I'd make some fuckin' changes because I don't want to live like that.
Don't just let things pass on like this, that's such a dull life to lead.

I guess when things were "all right" with my family while also having a gf, having time to play with my friends while studying. Then all the sudden I was alone in another city, away from family and gf, going after an universitary career that I didn't choose. I guess I couldn't handle living alone, so I came back to my city but family somehow got destroyed while I was not here and not so long ago my gf left and my closest friend died. After that, I just don't find a motive to do anything.

It would be too easy to kill myself right now. I don't like easy things desu.

But seriously now, it doesn't motivate me that my family crumbles. They were the ones that send me to another city alone to study without teaching me how to survive alone, so I had the shittiest lone life experience there. I've always been a good student but I couldn't even study because of how shitty I was on the living part. I don't want to live like this but like this at least I live. I'm sure that if I go away to live alone again this time will be the same of going to death embrace.

i'm not a therapist but it sounds like you're depressed m8.
Do you see anyone for these problems or nah? It might be better to go through therapy or psychiatry to get some help. Personally it didn't do much for me but it's different for everyone.
What got me to do shit was having me constantly berating myself for being a fuck up. It's not healthy but it works.

why are you playing video games when you need a fucking job, NOW? leave this thread and start applying. anything.

Yeah you're right but therapist costs money. To get money I need a job. To get a job I need motivation to get a job. To get motivation to get a job, I have to go to the therapist. And so on...

Thanks for the advice, but even if I want to apply, something stops me from doing it and at the end I just don't do anything.

What about when you were a child, a child is happy because all they need to be pleased are simple things like warmth, food and the need to love and be loved, etc. When you complicate things with wanting money and pleasures you end up feeling empty because the way you want things to be is not the way things are.

I think what you need is some sort of order in your life, I'm assuming you're an atheist, I recommend looking into the philosophical aspects of Christianity (what Christ commands, i.e turn the other cheek, do good to those that hate you, etc.). I believe in God because I've seen physical miracles done and things of the such, I don't think I can convert you in this thread but just know you can believe in evolution and most scientific theories and still believe in God, God is energy, energy cannot be created or destroyed, is everywhere, has power over all things, was needed for creation, is needed to sustain life.

Having fun and being happy are different things. I don't think as childs we're happy but we do have fun, and if we are happy, then it's just a time to time thing, not something that lasts long. I can have fun even now while I'm in this state, and sometimes I feel kinda happy, but happiness nor the things that make me happy give me motivation.

I'm kinda an atheist and without trying to be disrespectful to yours or any other religion, I just don't like the concept of god even if all the religions have values that are worth learning about. I'm not an illiterate on this matter either, I know things from many different beliefs but it's just not my thing. Thanks for the advice either way.

A child doesn't have fun being warm though, or nursing or sleeping or being hugged by their mother but they bring the child peace, peace is happiness, children are good at achieving this because they focus on one thing at a time, they don't have worries because they don't have complex desire.

OP, I have no advice, really, but I can relate a lot to you knowing that you should do something but being unable to bring yourself to start. Motivation is fickle, yet I don't have the willpower to do things without it. I can yell at my arm, telling it to move, but it's not going to until I subconsciously make it do so, by some mysterious means. In the same way, no matter how much I tell myself, yell at myself, or plead with myself to do something about my life, it doesn't happen.

I suppose we need to find motivation somewhere. Even something like having an anime character that you look up to as a role model can help, as preposterous as it sounds.

In any case, I wish you luck.

You're right.

I started thinking that I'm the best even with all that happend to me and around me (knowing that I'm not, but whatever), and with the mentality of never giving up on life knowing that what's bad can be worst if I let it get worse. For now, I just don't let it get worse, even when I know I'm doing nothing to make it better at the same time. My gamer friend who died and I had a saying: "If they can't win, then we will". Same goes for everything. If life can't win against me, then eventually I will. Best of luck to you too.

Where are you from?

I think, you really need to see a doctor. This emotional state - depression - usually ends in self-isolation, guilt feelings, addictions and suicide. Some antidepressants might help at first, just to get you stabilized and motivated.
But you really should see someone to talk to. If you cannot afford a therapist - in some countrys it will be paid by the health insurance - social or religious institutions usually have counseling centers. They can help you getting your life right.

Just don't give up. If you want to kill yourself, please go to the hospital instead. They will save your life. Please take this advice seriously.

You are 23, I know people that finished schoom and started a career by that age, get movin because life waits for none

Don't worry about that, I'll not kill myself. Country is Argentina, there's health insurance but I don't have it and I don't want to deal with social or religious institutions desu. Even like that, I'll never give up, I'm stubborn on that for sure.

Yes, I know that.