Mismatched sex drive

I'm not gay, I dislike vaginas more than penises.

maybe you're just asexual then.

I'm not, I still masturbate plenty. I just don't crave sex often. Sex is boring.

Guy here. Sex isn’t important to me. Infact, sex can be stressful. Neither condoms or birth control are 100% effective. So I always feel so stressed the week before the girl’s period praying she’s not pregnant.

I’d much rather just cuddle and make out. Occasional bjs are nice tho

I'm gonna give this a few probing questions because this reeks of bait.

How does he fuck you? Is he vocal? Have you ever suggested he indulge one of your fantasies or kinks to make it not boring? What do you masturbate to?

>what's the point of him being there if I'm just going to use a vibrator?
um lots of things. he can kiss you while you use it
play with your nipples
you can get on top of his dick and use the vibe on your clit

He fucks me however I want him to. I usually say missionary because I don't care. He doesn't moan, if that's what you mean by vocal. I have no fantasies or kinks that I'd like to indulge in bed. The things I masturbate to wouldn't be hot in real life.

What's the point of kissing? As for the nipples, I could play with them myself... it's awkward to have him hovering there expecting me to do something sexy.

If you don’t like affection, then why do you even have a boyfriend?

For the “status”?

>The things I masturbate to wouldn't be hot in real life.
It sounds like you have a bit of porn rotting your expectations of sex. And then there's the rest of your post. Do you think you're ready for a relationship?

Porn isn't rotting my expectations of sex, I'm just into weird stuff that wouldn't work well in real life. Think vore or cannibalism. Stuff that would be gross and unpleasant in real life but that works just fine in fiction.

>I want sex once every six months
Wut?

>I want sex once every six months
>I don't like being eaten out and what's the point of him being there if I'm just going to use a vibrator?

It is almost as if OP already knows she is not in love with him and is trolling us....

Then you need to find out where your arousal from vore and/or cannibalism stems from and perhaps work on it if you want a healthy sexual relationship. If you don't, then don't look into it. Now there's this:
>And then there's the [lack of caring about affection part] of your post. Do you think you're ready for a relationship?

Sex isn't love, fampai. There are forms of affection that aren't related to fucking.

It stems from being bitten by a dog when I was young. It was traumatic and I don't want to experience it again, despite the fetish it spawned.

Do you think therapy would aid you in any way? Gonna ask one last time:
>And then there's the [lack of caring about affection part] of your post. Do you think you're ready for a relationship?

I don't see how therapy would help. I'm well over the trauma but the fetish is still there.

Yes, I think I'm ready for a relationship. I don't mind giving pity sex, I think.

True user, but intimacy (under which sex falls) both get processed through the Nucleus Accumbens in the brain. Meaning that intimacy and love are intertwined. Furthermore, it is of biological importance that subjects that are in love are sexually drawn to one another.

OP just is not in love with this guy.

>What's the point of kissing? As for the nipples, I could play with them myself... it's awkward to have him hovering there expecting me to do something sexy.
then i'd suggest a breakup.

honestly just tell your boyfriend you dont mind him fucking other girls. open relationship would work for u guys,
he can have great sex when he wants. and u still can hang out with him

Do you really think your grandpa and grandma are sexually drawn to one another? Look at them. Old people are hideous.

The fetish, its root in trauma, is affecting your ability to have a, strictly speaking, normal sex life, and by extension a normal relationship. I strongly suggest therapy. Note: Therapy is not a cure. A therapist is someone who guides you to find your own solutions.
>Yes, I think I'm ready for a relationship. I don't mind giving pity sex, I think.
Now ask your boyfriend if he'd be fine with pity sex and fake moans. He probably won't be.

For some reason it posted before I was done. What you're doing, OP, is trying to find justification for lying to your boyfriend instead of tackling the root issue. That's not a healthy way to live, and I'd bet 5,000 USD you'd get bored of pity sex and fake moans before the year is out. You'd see it as a chore more than you already do. Get help if you actually want to better yourself. The alternative is not getting help, which only says you don't want to get better. Good luck.

I told him that already, he declined. He's too deep in love.

I really don't see what they could say or do to make things different. Having sex feels mildly pleasant but mostly boring, no matter how it's done. BDSM makes it downright unpleasant. The physical sensations are just bleh.

I've been giving pity sex and fake moans for much longer than a year, kiddo.

>When you have apples and when you have oranges

C'mon user, dont be so intellectually lazy.

>I really don't see what they could say or do to make things different.
Because you haven't done it yet. You're already writing it off because you'd rather continue this facade then better yourself.
Then I raise and bet 8,000 USD your relationship won't last because people who don't want to better themselves simply don't last in life. It's always been that way. I still wish you good luck. Goodbye.

It has lasted for 20 years so far and I have undergone therapy, although we never talked about sex.

Extreme kinks are usually a good indicator of long term porn usage. Your unwillingness to step back from it, a sign of addiction.

I'm not going to tell you how to live your life user, but intimacy with your partner is important. It isn't appealing to you in your current state because you're overstimulating yourself, and it's clearly creating a problem in your relationship.

So there are two ways this goes down:

1. You come to terms with your addiction and start taking steps to solve this problem

or

2. You keep getting high on your instant gratification, and watch this relationship, and every future relationship you want to have go down the drain.

This is no small issue, and it affects a lot of men as well. You need to take this seriously, user..

>although we never talked about sex
Considering your issue is sexual in nature, maybe you should consider talking about it, dum-dum.

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The extreme kinks have been there long before I knew anything about sex or porn.

I have strong doubts about that. Cannibalism and gore aren't sexual acts.

How do you believe this has all started?

Relatable I mean as nice as sex can be it’s something to be done on occasion not literally all the time. It’s like you have an entire super sweet cake you don’t eat the whole damn thing in one sitting.

6months is. Bit long imo but it’s the same idea?

Sure, but you also don't take a bite every six months, or the things going to be a rotting pile of waste by the time you get back.

It started when I was bitten by a dog and sent to the hospital. I was 6. Fantasies about others getting bitten or eaten started around then but didn't become truly sexual until I hit puberty.

You also don't take a bite once every 6 months otherwise it will go bad.

No, please stop it. I personally hate when someone does something for me for pity, he'll eventually find out you're doing it for pity, and if he really loves you he'll feel very offended

You were bit by a dog, and sent to the hospital so now you get turned on by people getting bitten.

I think you may have larger problems here.

Love is a chemical reaction in the brain to promote breeding

If you’re not at least simulating breeding then it’s probably not love

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That kind of love doesn't usually last more than four years, it's called infatuation.

Post below that have been bait.

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Not really. Many fetishes begin that way. It's like when chicks with daddy issues want to call their boyfriends daddy.

Yes, long enough to raise a kid who can follow the troop

With the exception that one is being sexually attracted to the concept of a taboo relationship with a strong and supportive rolemodel, and the other is sexually attracted to the concept of people being bit by animals.

Sure, exactly the same. I mean, that's what I was thinking about every time I was bit by animals as a kid, or held at knife point.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahah.

Anyway op, go to your doctor and get prescription for this as anticonception
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medroxyprogesterone_acetate
and then inject it to your bf's butthole every 1~3 months. It will make him forget sex.

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Hey man, I was bit in the ass. The ass is taboo and sexual. I had to show my toddler ass to a doctor. It's not weird that it spawned a fetish.

While the original event which triggered your obsession with being swallowed was significant in its own right before you discovered porn, even if the sexual nature of it was mild when you were young, the intense nature of how nothing in the real world satisfies you is because you choose to live in a fantasy where what you physically desire will never be attainable through the actions of any connection with another person. Regardless of whether or not it's porn which has caused this, (which obviously there's no way that online porn surrounding vore hasn't deeply accelerated and entrenched this far more than it would have been otherwise. So you're bullshitting when you say porn isn't a role), it is the same overall extremely sad symptom which porn often causes in people.

I really want you to think about the nature of that condition and decide if that's something you want to keep doing. If you're completely comfortable with never having meaningful, enjoyable, or passionate sex with anyone for the foreseeable future, then go ahead. Some people are also asexual and there's nothing wrong with that. I just think that the full context needs to be really discussed for this advice thread to actually address the issue.

And maybe this is other people in the thread saying this, but you seem a little too apathetic. Not depressingly overwhelmingly apathetic, but large amounts of generosity is often a necessary part of making relationships thrive. Everyone could stand to be nicer, especially to those closest to them. How do you think your apathy and unwillingness to negotiate a solution is going to go over from his perspective? Sure you have your reasons, which are perfectly fair and applicable in your universe. But to him, he has this girlfriend who he has sex with relatively often. Maybe he sees something is off, maybe he doesn't. But soon enough, she is considering telling him that he doesn't make her, and never made her feel aroused once. That affects a man.

Okay, but then you had just as much cause to fantasize about the patient-doctor scenario. Why lock on to the fact that you got bit in the ass? Just seems odd that it somehow got associated sexually.

>penis doesn't make me cum

That's extremely common though. Just take care of each of your orgasms separately. Have him help you masturbate or something,its not that difficult.

I'm sorry for saying this, user, but usually women who don't want sex regularly (1-2 times a week at least) either has some mental or physical problem which forbids them or their bf can offer shitty sex and they simply don't know what good sex is, so they of course want to minimize the amount of time it happens.

What you're talking about isn't Love. LOVE is a form, and it is what brings you closer to divinity. It isn't cheap, or easy, or changing. It's infinite and true and as real as you are.

You need to see a doctor and/or your bf needs to git gud at sex. Everyone can be made to reach mind-blowing orgasm. No exceptions.