Me and my gf have been together for almost 4 months, she made me to block at least 10 contacts from my fb and other communication apps (instagram, etc..), while she's got tons of ex-boyfriends and all sorts of motherfuckers in her contacts, so the thing is: when i argue in order to make her block all this people (just like she did to me), she suddenly tells me to stop and gets mad, saying that she has nothing to do with them now, and that it's awlfull of my part to be mistrusting her.
She kind of saved me from years of masturbation and porn, and i feel like i kind of own her part of this well beeing that i'm feeling (she had a lot of patience with me at the beggining cause i was so addicted to porn that i couldn't even had sex for more then 1 minute - deep premature ejaculation, now things are getting better).
So my point is: am i weighting things properly? the fact that she had tons of pacience with me validades her behavior? Should i tell her this situation is bothering me (even if she appels with anger and unreasonable arguments and threathen to end our relationship) ? Is it worth? Or should I go for a more sloppy line and see where things will end?
She's got BPD like guaranteed Or she's coming dangerously close I'd just get out. Explore your newfound virility with chicks who don't even know what Discord is just to be safe
Eli Ross
BUMP
Cameron Hill
Get out or die out, man. It ain't complex
Owen Torres
Hey man, my ex used to be the same way. I hate to tell you this, but it's a telltale sign of cheating behavior and sexual opportism.
Women are masters of turning the situation around and using theatrics as a smoke screen to play the victim and distract from the real issue. You can try to stay calm and use reason, but as you probably know already, it won't work.
She talks a big game about trust but at the end of the day she wants more control than she's willing to give because she wants to keep her options open while denying you the same freedom. When my ex tried this I gave her an ultimatum; either she deleted and blocked the contacts that I felt were inappropriate, or I would walk. That simple. Additionally, I made her give me the codes and passwords to her phone, email, and all her social media. I also made sure to get her on my phone plan so that I could find out if she deleted something. She had no choice but to agree to all this because she depended on me so much.
I'm sure some people would say that what I did wasn't right, but the fact is, all our trust issues went away after this. Trust is a meme, but transparency works. This is because at the end of the day, people think firstly of themselves. If they want something and think they can get away with it, they will do it, even when they know it's wrong. Once there is not enough privacy to move freely however, they will think of what they had to lose and the survival instinct will kick in.
Bottom line; be calm, but firm. Put your foot down and tell her that the no contact policy is going to have work both ways, no buts, or else.
Grayson Bailey
Damn, this is woke af
And it seems like an easy, legit way to approach it. Just say if she want's to limit you in those ways, then you want the same thing.
Brayden Peterson
This. My ex accused me all the time. Turns out she was fucking every guy she could get away with. Dump her user. There's too many red flags here to know where to start
Joshua James
OP here, i don't believe i can just simply dump her, she's a fucking degenerate, she would hit all my friends and fuck up my name to thousands of persons, i think i should go for some side chicks then, considering she's fucking every motherfucker she can get away with, or i should find a pacific way of leaving this, any ideas?
Gavin Adams
Tell everyone you got herpes from her and that's why you broke up with her. Chances are you probably did anyway.
Aiden Robinson
> can't break up because she'll talk shit
Jesus Christ, this is a toxic situation. You just need to get out of it. Yeah, hearing the rumors she spreads will suck. That's just something you're going to have to deal with. If you won't help yourself, then nothing we say is going to help.
Logan Jenkins
Then i'll be cheating her as well, that's it, i'm done with this shit, if that's what she wants, she'll have it.
Joshua Campbell
Wow, what a beautiful thing you two have going here.
Sounds to me like it's already over. The body is on the table and the EKG has flatlined, doctor just has to call the time.
Alexander Martinez
Sorry to tell you, but is damn right. Trust has to go both ways in a relationship or it is bound to crash on itself. Good thing is that you acknowledge that she clearly is being abusive.
Ryan Edwards
GET OUT NOW
Jackson Sanders
OP here man, i simply cannot man, i just had a discussion, she was away from about an hour, and i asked where she was, i believe deeply she was lying, but she swore she was just running, then i said "if you don't tell the truth we're over" then she said "so thats it, you just fucked me and now wants do get off?" she's turning everything , i can't discuss with her like an usual adult, she just keeps going with personal arguments and skipping the original discussion, i think i'll have to endure this relation till the end of my life or till the day she finally gets bored and kicks my ass, but i swear to god, i'll be cheating as soon as i can (really dont think i'll be capable of doing it, i'm a shitty socializer)
Ayden Hernandez
Dude speaking from personal experience, get out now. I don't care what excuse you make. You have to break up with her. You don't want this go on for a year until you reach a breaking point and do things you're not proud of, like talk to other girls or cheat on her or whatever.
I had a girlfriend who I was afraid to break up with. And I Just did it recently. And it was fucking ugly man. And I'm still really shook from it. But listen, you have to end it now while you still can. Four months isn't long for a relationship at all. Four months is nothing. But when you start to go over a year, you start to feel a sense of commitment, making it harder and harder to break off the relationship as the years go on.
Charles Williams
but man, she swears on fucking god she isn't cheating on me and that she loves me, idk what to do for real, i'm so fucked up, i fear hardly on breaking and regretting later, what if she's loyal but crazy at the sime time?
Jackson Carter
Dude, you don't have to stay with her. You are not obligated to, even if she did help you. If she tries to turn everything on you like this then it's clearly abuse.
YOU ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO STAY WITH HER. Relationships should be consensual, both parties staying in them because they want to. You should leave. It really sucks and god do I know how awful it feels to have to stand up for yourself and feel like shit for doing so.
She is not fair, she is not rational, and staying with her is only doing you harm. In this situation, it doesn't matter what she thinks. Get in contact with your old friends and explain the situation. Say what's happening to your support network so they know what's going on. Then put your foot down and leave. it's the best thing you can do. Not just for oyu, but for her as well.
The longer you stay in a relationship with her, the more it hurts you. The longer you stay in a relationship with her, the longer she goes thinking that behavior like that is acceptable. leaving her might get it through her skull that this shit doesn't stand.
Brandon Scott
it doesn't matter if she's loyal or not dude. she's obviously abusive. she makes you cut contact with people because of her jealousy or whatever stupid and selfish reason she might have, yet when you do it she doesn't want to. even if she was the most loyal girl in the world she wouldn't be worth it for the sake of your mental health and social life.
break up with her and find someone who's more mature and sane. you'll do it eventually, I'm telling you now. but the longer you wait, the harder and more nasty the breakup will be. so do it now.
Angel Brooks
I'm but just to add onto this, if everyone else is telling you multiple reasons why this relationship is bad for you, and you respond with "if" statements then maybe you should listen to us man.
Elijah Richardson
>OP here man, i simply cannot man
You can. But you refuse not to. So live with the consequences.
Nicholas Rogers
People can genuinely love other people and still be abusive. That doesn't make the abuse okay, or justify their shitty behavior.
And even if she is loyal, she's being controlling, she will not communicate, she will not trust. Communication and trust are absolutely vital for a healthy relationship, and she is destroying it.
She has to change. And in order for her to realize she has to change, she has to lose what she values due to her mistakes. She obviously won't otherwise. You've tried your best, and she won't budge.
Aaron Brown
Act with integrity. She'll respect you and you'll respect yourself. If you're not okay with her demands tell her you love her but you will not compromise yourself to please her.
Caleb Hill
Think of it like this, man. Staying with this girl not only hurts you, but actively prevents you from finding happiness.
What if you miss your chance with some girl who would treat you like a decent human being because you're staying with this chick? Breaking up sucks and it's always going to suck, but a clean break now gives you a better chance for happiness in the future. The longer you wait the harder it's gonna be.
Jaxon Gray
Maybe not herpes, he'll never get laid again, chlamydia is a better option
