Is it wrong to date a guy because you pity him...

Elaborate
It’s a possibility like anything else, but IMO he’s way too nice to do that. I mean he feels sincerely guilty if he doesn’t say “bless you” when somebody sneezes.
Not a relationship, silly

You just cherry picked the replies that didn't spoonfeed you the answer and ignored the others
Go fuck yourself

Excuse me for not getting to everything at once

I would not want someone to go on a pity date with me, it's extremely humiliating and would make me feel even worse knowing that girls actively pity me

My advice is to leave him alone, like i said you don't really owe him anything. If you really want to help him introduce him to a cute friend of yours, give him some tips on how to dress and how to act in front of other women.

Just please DON'T go out with him, that would be the worse thing you can do if you genuinely want to help him out and give him a confidence boost as you said

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you obviously feel some sort of connection there

what right do you have to pity him? are you really so much better?

This very much
Don't play with that guy feelings, honestly just telling him to man up would be best.

OP it's ok only if you fuck him during the relationship

this will legitimately boost his confidence if you do it right

This

It will be even more helpful if its not a relationship.

Sounds fucking cruel. Girls saying "You would be a great husband!" but don't see the person as relationship material are way worse than the ones simply ignoring the dude.

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bruh, if you don't want to give him a relationship than leading him on is the single worst thing you could possibly do

Sleeping with him would be a great confidence boost yes. Chances are hes just infatuated with the idea of you. I've come to the conclusion that it's impossible to love someone you've never been intimate with.

no, you fucking roastie

I advise against this OP. You're basically toying with him. I had similar things happen to me when I was a young Neet. It fucked my perception of women pretty good. Leave him and he will improve over time and fix his shit. Breaking his heart will only hinder him.

That just means they aren't physcially attracted to him but still acknowledge his partner skills. The sad truth is that young people care about looks and sex 99% of the time over having a good relationship

The whole point of dating is to find a soulmate that you'll fall head over heels for and love forever. While you're with this guy, you're not looking for that soulmate. Date for the right reasons.

And no, what you're doing is not nice. You're faking interest and operating on a motive you're not going to tell him which is lying and deceitful. That already is unacceptable enough. You're getting him into a relationship which you know will end and upset him. But you don't care that you'll do this to him. And no, that relationship will not quietly end like you think. If you think it will, then I can tell that you have not been in many relationships at all. He will be incredibly attached and there will be drama that you won't be ready to deal with when you end things with him. It won't be pretty and you'll regret having pulled on his strings like that.

It honestly sounds like you're almost on an immature power trip where you think you can grace somebodies life by dating them to give experience or something. It's snobby and arrogant. I don't like it. This guy isn't this pathetic meek person that you think he is. It shows that you've judged him in a very negative way which isn't nice either.

Which means that they say "You're a great person but your body is so hideous your personality can't compensate that fact". So she should leave him alone.

Don't listen to all the angry r9k soibois here. Having sex is precisely how men become men. If you don't love the guy that's fine, you can just bang him and call it quits. He will become a better man for it.

I've been single my whole life, said I was "in love" with multiple girls over the years, got my "heart broken" yadda yadda. Having sex is what gave me confidence and made me realise I'm not the pathetic loser I thought I was.

She can still be social with him, just don't lead him on. You gotta get over the fact that not everyone on the planet wants to bang you.

But leading him on is exactly what she's planning to do. The guy is obviously naive and would expect her to pursue a relationship.

No lol, girls aren't leading you on simply by wanting to hang out with you. If you're so deluded that you think any form of interaction means she wants to sleep with you then YOU are the problem.

Now if she's saying shit like "I love you, I'm thinking about you blah blah blah" the she is leading you on. But asking you if you want to go out for a drink is a perfectly normal non slut thing to do.

Best post ITT.

OP what makes you so special? You're literally just a girl who thinks she's got something that this guy does not.

Leave him alone OP and stick to trying to find love on Tinder.

>wanting to hang out with you
she's going on dates with him, that's way more than just hanging out

If they're dating and having sex then there's no leading on, for christ sake boys get it together.

BENIS IN BAGINA

He’s pretty cute in a boyish way. Just not what I’m looking for.

Then like I said in my other post if you truly consider him a friend and a really good person give him some advice on how to get his game together and get him set up with someone else

That's not what I said at all. She should either bang him (if she wants to) or make it abundantly clear (by outright telling him) that they will never be together in that way.

If she's truly a great person she will try and set him up with her friends (if she doesn't want him)

Just got out of a relationship, in which I was just pulled along. It truly hurts. Stop dragging him around.

Want a fresh stalker?

I was just like the guy you're talking about, a friend of mine decided to date me to "build me up" as she said so, she is and extroverted and laid back gal, and a girl that I thought she would be only interested in a confident Chad and not a beta like me, maybe that statement still holds true, but she did a great job at hiding it, because the moment we started "dating" she was suddenly attracted to me, (I was kinda "cute" back then, skinny, pale skin and down to the shoulders black curly hair, 7/10 face). The funny thing is, she wasn't a mommy gf as I thought, advising me at everything, all the contrary, she always let mw make all the decisions in the relationship, every single one... at first I was extremely uncomfortable with it, when I would ask what she wanted she would just say a variation of "whatever you think is best", I was stuck in this leading position in the relationship. At first i thought she was trying to annoy me acting like being useless, but I keep on making the decisions, as time passed, I became more comfortable with it and began to feel more confident in other aspects of my life. We lasted 6 months, suddenly ending our relationship, at first I was very sad for her to do that, but I discovered I was able to bear with the loss much better than before, we cut contact for 4 months, but now we are just friends, I actually got a new gf in that period and I'm still with her for the past 3 years.

Is safe to say that I'm indebted to her, for I wouldn't be able to get with my actual gf without her "guidance", because I had to make the first move, something I thought I would never be able to do before, but with my newfound confidence, wasn't much of a problem, doing it in an almost normal way.

Lol. You are literally the walking stereotype.

“He’s not Chad, but he’s a greeeeaaattt guy for someone else!”

Pretty neat.

Good for you lad, unfortunately I lost a lot of confidence dating a girl who was completely needy and all she wanted to do was to lay in bed with me, sucking me into her ways. Granted we had a lot in common, after the floaty hearts stopped floating I realized how much energy she took from me.

As for OP give it a shot but know what you're getting into. You could may this guys life 10x better by being a strong partner for him, but if you start feeling a drain rubbing off I would drop it. Don't go into it if you aren't in anyway attracted to him, you're just gonna spoil his view on women.

Guys reject girls that they think have nice personalities and would be good gfs too, if they aren't physically attracted. It's not a female trait exclusively, it's a trait of people who could be labeled "shallow" at most. But I don't buy that really - physical attraction is important.

You should just leave this guy alone if you don't have any real interest in him. You're already going into this with the wrong attitude. How do you think he would feel if you told him, "Yeah I don't really respect you as a man but I'll go out with you a few times to get your spirits up" like he's some charity case who needs you to ride in and build him up. If you're not interested in him, the best thing you can do is firmly reject his advances. Dating someone with motives other than genuinely wanting to get to know them is a form of deception. Not only that but it's humiliating when you figure out you were someone's project.

Besides, who are you to try to help someone? Do you even have your own life together? Would any of the guys you actually respect want to marry you? From what you've written it seems as if you see yourself "above" this guy despite the fact that you're both at the same status in life, just because you perceive him as "meek" and "nice". Life will mold him into the man he needs to be as strong men are forged in the fire. Take your mothering condescending attitude on down the road if you're not into it

>he feels sincerely guilty if he doesn’t say “bless you” when somebody sneezes.

If hes actually feeling guilty about athing like that, he's got some issues to work through. He's better off learning to be more of an "Asshole" (read: take care of his own need, not putting others above yourself) instead of someone goading him on.

I mean you can do it if you're absolutely honest about this being just sex and nothing more form the get-go, but it will most likely turn into a shitshow anyways.

You're mind fucking him. If you want to be nice be his actual friend and wing man him for some pussy.

>The whole point of dating is to find a soulmate that you'll fall head over heels for and love forever.

No. The point is to meet new people and see where it goes, The might just turn out to be taht erson if you get to know them, but if they don't well, you still had fun.
Stop being cucked by disney, have fun with people around you instead of dreaming about soending your life with someone you don't even know.

>I was stuck in this leading position in the relationship.

Holy shit, this chick is a great coach. Women don't need a chad, but they want aman who can stick up for himself and makes his own decisions. Seh really knew what she was doing.

But other than OP, this doesn't sound like a "pity date", and more like she systematically coached you on relationships, shich is vastly different.

For a guy who Is kinda like the dude ypu are talking about, don't pls. I have my own way. Also fook u. I can do it on my own. It's kinda like playing with another person's feelings. Also fuck the people who say we'll be clingy. When we like someone, we respect their decision. Just because we say yes and nod most of the times we're push overs. We just don't say no unless it's bad or too fucked up. We literally would fuck shit up only if it was legal.

Don't do this OP but do help him find a girl. Tell him you are going to do it. I do this all the time for guys I know like me, are good guys, but they aren't for me. It always disarms them.

>We lasted 6 months
user she wasn't your gf but a damn good coach

I know your intention is nice, but you can't do it. It'll only crush him more and lower his self confidence more. The best thing you can do is be honest with him: someday he'll make a girl a great husband, but that girl is not you if you're not interested. Don't give him false hope. I did a similar thing to what you're thinking of doing once, and I really hurt the guy and once I gave him hope and then turned him down everyone kind of treated me like I was an asshole. Which I was, honestly.

Maybe a better thing you could do is hook him up with somebody? Find a girl you think would work well with him and introduce them.

a thots thoughts. Almost sweet of you, hoebag

>The best thing you can do is be honest with him: someday he'll make a girl a great husband, but that girl is not you if you're not interested.
The best thing you can do is tell him cut dry and simple that you're not interested. Trying to sugarcoat it in any way is patronizing