so i met my girlfriend (FIRST EVER RELATIONSHIP BY THE WAY) at a bar in newyork 2 years ago.
so my parents loved my girlfriend when they first met her, and for the first year of our realtionship, as did my friends, however we moved out together (from brookyn, to brooklyn, same city that my parents still live in)
and ever since my mother and father have apparently slowly disliked her, until Today, they finanly had a big conversation with me and said they think she is controlling and manipluative, i thought they were crazy.
i thought they LOVED her up until this last conversation, and im happy with my girlfriend
they think she is trying to make me cut ties and ignore my parents so she has me to herself.
my GF is lovely and i didnt really see too many red flags like this, and have always thought i would one day marry her.
only red flags ive noticed have been :she doesnt seem to exactly love me going to parties with my friends. : she wants to spend ALOT of time with me (all day) :sometimes i miss being single (going to nightclubs, meeting people ect) :when im out with my girlfriend, she seems to only want to hang out with me, and is kind of always a downer (moping around, upset, when im running around having a good time with my friends)
how to i look at this NON bias and figure out whats actually going on, and if i should stay with her?
Psychologist here, studies show that your friends and family are better at judging your relationships than you are.
Cameron Hill
>just get done sucking dicks cuz it's a hard OP life >realize I might have a problem with my GF cuz senpai thinks she's clingy and controlling >go straight to an El Pasoan clam bake forum to talk to them about it instead of my GF >haven't killed myself yet, don't know why
Modern people don't understand really loving people. Just talk to her and tell her you to do stuff for yourself so that you can be happy.
She can obv do these things with you or not.
Say you need to spend more time with your fan and see what happens
>she doesnt seem to exactly love me going to parties with my friends. So when you are going out with your friends she is giving you negative feedback trough withdrawing her love for you? Basically she is training you do not to out with friends. Its pavlovian conditioning. You do A, she don't like that you do A, so whenever you do A, she acts in ways that makes you feel bad. So you eventually stop doing A. (A = hanging with friends. She is stopping you from hanging with friends)
>she wants to spend ALOT of time with me (all day) If she spends all time with you then she can influence you more. People with personality disorders such as narcissim or borderline will typically isolate the person they are trying to manipulate. But other then that, relationships where people are together ALL the time are rarely healthy.
>when im out with my girlfriend, she seems to only want to hang out with me, and is kind of always a downer (moping around, upset, when im running around having a good time with my friends) Again, this behaver is a form of manipulation. You are out with your friends, she don't like that so she acts in a way that makes your experience of hanging with your friends in to a negative one. Lets say you have a dog that wants to go to the playground, but you decide you don't like that so that whenever you go to the playground you treat the dog like shit, eventually the dog don't want to go to the playground anymore because it associates that with the negative emotions you caused.
Brandon Adams
The state of that board
Daniel Howard
Nigga you retarded or something? You are being a bitch 'cuz a girl basically worships you? Nigga you better be mentally challenged. 98% Of this board is praying to find a girl that would worship them.
look, no trolling, yes she is pretty and she LOVES me and i'm like 99% of her life, she sucks my dick about 3 times a week, and buys me stuff all the time. but these are all things that would make me ignore actual red flags, and be blindsighted, right?
Christopher Bennett
oh yes for sure.
Isaiah Ward
Just talk to her, see where it leads.
Grayson King
I want to say right now I regret every getting into a relationship. She's unbelievably attached and clingy. I'm going traveling without her and she hates it, I wanted to get a job that might let me travel and she hated it.
This girl is terrified of not being a child and living without her parents. I hate that attitude.
I've come to resent her a lot and I am by no means a perfect boyfriend. But more and more I find myself purposefully avoiding her.
Anons heed my words, relationships aren't for young guys
ugh nit hurts though because she seems ALMOST perfect.. but damn... im 21and i would LOVE to go out to nightclubs and meet women and be free
Connor Roberts
>she wants to spend ALOT of time with me (all day) get rid of her or you will lose your friends, your family, your hobbies and yourself.
Brayden Watson
as others have said before, talk to her about it. all the people here saying "DUMP HER CUZ SHE'S CLINGY" are retarded and have obviously never been in a solid relationship with a woman before. there's not a single non-tomboy female being who is not, at least to some degree, clingy. It's not necessarily alright of her to not like you going out with your friends but it's still somewhat understandable. from what I can tell, she probably has some self-esteem issues, which I noticed a lot of women have. my gf (been together with her for 5 years) was like that at the beginning of our relationship too because she wasn't sure what my party nights looked like but I talked to her about it. most people whom I know aren't 100% happy about their partners going out partying and having fun without them. it's just something that's prevalent in a lot of relationships because it's odd to most people that their partner could have that much fun without them. it's all about acceptance and communication
TALK to her about all issues you have with her but in a respectful way. I mean, even though she's clingy, you still have to consider that she maybe loves doing stuff with you and being around you. the thing with your family is a bit more complicated. if you love your girlfriend and accept the way she is, you shouldn't listen to your family. families and friends don't always have the best advice and usually don't know your partner as well as you do. they just see everything from an outsider perspective so looks can often be deceiving. as I said, if you can accept the way your gf is, tell your family to shut up about it and just respect your decision
Hudson Myers
or he could just do whatever he wants to do and tell his girl that she's not his mom? fuck's sake, you people remind me of those teenagers who think they know everything but never experienced a functioning relationship with compromises and respect. if you don't let people treat you like shit, there isn't just the option to get rid of them. sometimes both women and men are used to be controlling. often enough, you can just tell them to back off and you will be fine. females are just not that used to getting talked back at because most guys follow suit on everything. be a goddamn man for once and just don't take shit from your woman without pussying out of the relationship instantly
Cameron Adams
>im 21
You dont know anything about your relationship. Neither does anyone on this forum. You sound like you want out. See if you can get her to consider being your main bitch and get yourself some side thots.
