Over 30 and want to die?

>hundreds of times over the years
So you're a spammer, eh?

It's not that simple. You strength implying that we are simply not listening when in fact we cannot muster the motivation required to changes ourselves.

>It's literally as simple as getting the fuck out of bed, going outside and getting some sun
That works for all of 10 minutes before you remember you are you.

>figuring out what you can do rather than what you can't do.
Apparently getting a career in IT is relatively easy but when I ask Jow Forums or Jow Forums to elaborate, they have nothing to say.

Fucking auto correct

I will get these small streaks of motivation and then I always end up back where I started. Sometimes I feel like I am not capable of making the change I want to see, as if I am just a spectator to my life unfolding. Meanwhile, everybody is saying, just do this or that...and wondering why I'm not.

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You've not put in serious effort. You let your depression wall you in, and even worse you refuse to seek treatment for the depression. I'm going to repeat it: Getting over this is as simple as fucking doing it. The only struggle is getting past not wanting to do it and wanting to sink back into your comfortable cocoon.
>That works for all of 10 minutes before you remember you are you.
The point is making use of those 10 minutes to achieve something. Then trying again. The purpose of feeling better isn't so you don't feel badly anymore, it's so you can push yourself past your limits.
>Apparently getting a career in IT is relatively easy but when I ask Jow Forums or Jow Forums to elaborate, they have nothing to say.
I'm not saying to go for something that's relatively easy, I'm saying to go for something that you can do rather than something you can't do. If you can't figure out how to get a career in IT, then it's clearly something you cannot do as you are.

Because you look at your streaks of motivation as self-contained efforts to improve yourself that failed, rather than moments of progress that you should continue. Look at it as an island-hopping campaign.

I seem to not have the willpower and I do feel like I have made a serious effort (therapy, medication, gym 3 days a week for years). I always end up back where I started.

If you can get to the gym 3x/week for years, you are a lot less catastrophically depressed than you put on.

>If you can't figure out how to get a career in IT, then it's clearly something you cannot do as you are.
Wow, encouraging. And it's supposed to be one of the easier careers to get into. So what you're basically saying is that I have nothing except wageslavery to look forward to.

I think the biggest problem I have yet to overcome is my social anxiety. It is extreme. I can say hi to people while walking my dog but other than that I am as anti social as it gets.

>Wow, encouraging. And it's supposed to be one of the easier careers to get into. So what you're basically saying is that I have nothing except wageslavery to look forward to.
What the fuck do you think IT work is, dumbass? You're paid a pittance and it's a grind like every other fucking job.

Yeah, I got past that shit in my late-20s by doing meetup groups. I got to be good friends with a lady who organized a dining out one; she liked when I came to events because I took good pics, so she always made a point of including me in stuff. Yeah, it was a bit quid pro quo, but it helped me a ton.

>a dining out
I fail to see the draw to this. Like what happens at these dining out meetups?

shit guys, he knows. The jig is up.

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Socializing. Socializing is important for overall happiness. Scientifically proven that those who spend their time alone end up in poorer health and die earlier than those who socialize regularly. I'm not the guy you replied to but that's most likely why it helped him. Being part of a group (outside of work/education, with no concise goal besides enjoying company) is important for humans.

I'm sure it's better than minimum wage which is what I got at my wageslave place. A guy I worked with went to an entry level IT job and got 20k annual salary which is a big jump up from 12k he got stacking shelves.

That's not what I was asking.

>I fail to see the draw to this. Like what happens at these dining out meetups?
You try new restaurants, you chat with new people, maybe you go out for drinks afterwards. You leave having some light social experience and some good food. That's the emphasis, it's low-pressure and mostly focused on trying new food as a group. Often you share dishes so you can try a bunch of things. Many times, the people who do this are also Yelpers, but not always.

And hey, if it's a good place, maybe you can take a girl there someday.

>20k annual salary
>$10/hr. if he works 40 hrs/week.
Why the fuck even bother?

The thing about generic advice is that it's useful when you are in highschool but it gets less and less useful the longer you avoid fixing your problems
If you are 30 you are carryinng the weight of too many mistakes and problems that create other problems that create other problems and it's completely overwhelming and you are afraid of trying to fix anything because you don't know what the next thing that's going to get you is going to be it's like trying to build a house in a never ending earthquake, no matter how hard you try something is going to give in and it's going to bring all your progress down
And the scary thing is that there isn't such a thing as a rock bottom, things can always get worse and they will get worse unless you do something about it
I used to dream about getting my shit together in school and having a girlfriend and start hanging out with my friends more instead of giving excuses and getting good grades, school was 7 years ago and I obviously never accomplished that and it's gotten worse, so much worse and so much harder
Regular people can't and won't understand it because they have the narrow perspective of a person who never fucked things too much and who wasn't served too much shit and they want to believe they are right and they want to believe it's as easy for everyone else as it is for them but people who actually managed to achieve something regardless of getting completely fucked like us have an even narrower perspective because they forgot what it's like when they left it behind and they only have useless things to say

>The thing about generic advice is that it's useful when you are in highschool but it gets less and less useful the longer you avoid fixing your problems
That's the single most incorrect statement I've heard on Jow Forums in weeks.
>If you are 30 you are carryinng the weight of too many mistakes and problems that create other problems that create other problems and it's completely overwhelming and you are afraid of trying to fix anything because you don't know what the next thing that's going to get you is going to be it's like trying to build a house in a never ending earthquake, no matter how hard you try something is going to give in and it's going to bring all your progress down
And the scary thing is that there isn't such a thing as a rock bottom, things can always get worse and they will get worse unless you do something about it
Yeah, and you think the 18-year-old virgins who post the same catastrophic whining threads that the 30-year-olds do feel any less hopeless? You're just claiming the privilege of age as making you "more hopeless". It's nothing but a pissing competition for you, isn't it?

>I used to dream about getting my shit together in school and having a girlfriend and start hanging out with my friends more instead of giving excuses and getting good grades, school was 7 years ago and I obviously never accomplished that and it's gotten worse, so much worse and so much harder
Oh my god, the self-pity is so thick here you can cut it with a knife. Pull your head out of your ass dude.

>You're just claiming the privilege of age as making you "more hopeless". It's nothing but a pissing competition for you, isn't it?
Lol, at 18 you are still given the benefit of the doubt. No such luck in your late 20s and beyond.

You can be 18 and feel completely hopeless but you are most likely not
Things get harder with age and with time, people who are fucked at 30 where also fucked at 18. Imagine how your life is going to be if you woke up tomorrow ten years older and with 3 times as many problems
Things get worse the longer you live simple as that

>gets called out for treating hopelessness as a pissing competition
>proves my point in two sentences.
Buddy, I'm in my mid-30s and spent all of my 20s with neither a girlfriend nor a job. I don't give a fuck about your little problems, and neither does anybody else.

>Things get worse the longer you live simple as that
If you're actually past your early-20s, you should know for yourself that this isn't true in the least. The only thing that really disappears by your 30s is physical youth. Big fucking deal. You MORE than make up for it in accumulated knowledge. Fuck, I didn't get my first serious dates until I was 30.

you should go run a marathon and make a half hour long vlog on youtube lol

Not in the physical condition to run a marathon, unfortunately. And not that interested in it anyway. I'd rather have a job.

I suspect he's lying about his age. And look the thread has sunk to the bottom.

Sounds like you have no goals and probably not very happy with your body.

You're probably desperate for some serotonin. I bit one hit of it will my your dick instantly erect.

Don't go out there and seek happiness. Happiness will come to you. You'll naturally know when you're happy.

As of now, focus on making super small goals. Like if you're fat and eat out a lot. Make it a goal to not eat fast food for a whole week.

And then try to only accomplish that.

Even if only last 5 days in, that's definitely better than 0.

Make a list of things you like to complete and post them up here. I'd like to see them for critique.

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Yes. I'm 32 and every night I go to sleep wishing don't wake up.

>I suspect he's lying about his age
Nope. Unlike you, I lit a candle while you cursed the darkness.

I usually spend most of my time at the cinema to forget my life for a couple of hours. Maybe you should try that.

30, live with parents, got kid i only see for 3 hours a week after spliting up and taking her to court and lives 2 hours away and she took 25k which we was saving for a deposit , agree to try to make a go of it again gets pregnant and now wont say if she loves me or not, so dont if to go or stay its hard let go with someone after 10 years, im now starting to get fit and once the baby is born and will move on good luck everyone

>Nope. Unlike you, I lit a candle while you cursed the darkness.
How poetic.

You just need some help brother.
goodtherapy.org/find-therapist.html

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I’ve been depressed because I don’t know what the fuck to do with my life and I’m 21 and losing my shit each day your not alone.

I hate people that tell me
>It will become better
>Change yourself, and things will gets better
>Someone had it worse than you
>Just go see a doctor
I tried waiting for life to turn around but it never does, it's all downhill with little ups and a lot of downs.
I tried improving myself, but i don't stop thinking about how pointless it is, and being dead is still much better than being alive.
I just want to be dead, while i can still die happily and peacefully, instead of dying miserably when i'm old one day.

This is pretty much me, user. My youth is gone and I've become too jaded. I see the student interns at my work and how they group together just like I did when I was one of them. I know how they feel about me and the low-key contempt they have for us "old people". Being on the other side of the table sure sucks.

Okay, but HAVE you seen a doctor? These things you are feeling could be completely due to a chemical imbalance.

Pretty sure it's not a chemical imbalance issue.
I'm not depressed and suicidal all the time,
I simply found that i rather to be dead,
just like some people rather to run away from problems,
or some people rather to push themselves and improve themselves because it makes them feels good.
I simply found no interests in living anymore, that's all.
And people keep bullshitting me and asks me to change my mind because i have a different mindset than them wanting to stay alive.

For what its worth I scanned this thread briefly and I kind of feel dead to life myself. All that advice you greentext'd is kind of half-truth the issue is people present it as fact. Its more like.

>It COULD become better
>Change yourself, and things COULD get better
>People in your situation or worse have made it out so it MIGHT be possible for you
>Seeing a doctor COULD help

As far as it goes for me famalam I feel like my life is better than it was say the past half a decade and that's due to a combination of factors but mainly introspection and all that but I still feel a general sense of dissatisfaction with being alive.

The thing to drive home with this post is that you should at least exhaust and truly try all the avenues laid out before offing yourself. You might tell yourself you tried but you have to look inside and ask yourself if you truly did. If even the little bitty bittiest bit of you thinks you didn't then you still COULD fix your life.

I am currently trying to test the waters in a few ways and plan on killing myself if I am unsatisfied in a 5-10 years or whatever. At the end of the day we all die regardless and death is eternal sleep so I don't care if I have to suffer a few more for a chance to not suffer.

>inb4 reddit spacing
it looks good

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I'm not gonna off myself, I simply wanted to be dead.
If that make any sense.

Again I get what you mean. Death in my mind feels peaceful and comforting. Of course you feel nothing if you are dead but when I think about being dead I feel like I would be comfortable, free of worry, warm.

A lot of people feel this way in life, a large portion of people who want to die feel this way. Sometimes people who seem to have their shit together feel this way. Whether you kill yourself or don't kill yourself I can't say because who knows where life will take us but whatever choices you make in life, always be sure of them.

Me too, brah. It's a mixture of regret, unfulfillment with respect to my own life and, in an ever increasing magnitude, with the state of the world. To me, the world feels so much smaller, devoid of adventures and meaning nowadays. Everything new seems like a boring version of something old. Nothing ever, ever happens. There's nothing real to do anymore, anything remotely interesting is already 'turistized.' I have less willpower and self-control, I can't concentrate for long spans of time, as if my attention span itself was being reduced.

It's that or I'm so depressed that my perception is being altered.

i just turned 28 but i feel pretty hopeless. i dont want to die but i feel like i have no future and life is just passing me by. i have no idea what to do or how to fix it but i have to do something or its just gonna stay the same or get worse

>0845
That prefix costs money.

>I’m 21
One day you're going to be our age and wonder why you wasted time complaining in a thread meant for 30+ anons.

Never. I turned my sorrow and despair into hatred. I will live a long and productive life for the sole reason of spiting the world. Every moment I live I am consuming resources and shitting up the environment in a fashion that subsequent generations can only look back on in abject horror as they struggle to deal with my legacy.

In other words, have parents who care about you enough, be healthy (that shit is so important!!), you already even were able to be in a relationship (youre better than me here), no crippling debts

Sounds mostly as if your approach to live is a bit turned around. Never had depression myself but a close friend had it (hes in a similar situation, but he had to deal with cancer and other shit too, hes 26),thats what he told me

-depression is your body wanting you to feel down, not you. Its chemicals, not your life situation. Fuck those chemicals.
-self pity gives you absolutely nothing, its pointless shit, stop it

Some hints from myself:
-life is misery yadda yadda, yes, but its also the counterpart. As well as bad things, good shit will happen which you can't even imagine and there is nothing you can do about it. There will be situations worth it that youve made it that far. Keep that in mind.
-bring a little bit of movement into your life, sport would be awesome but a nice walk a few times in the week helps wonders. If you even go for sports: its exhausting but kinda the counterpart of depression, chemicals will make you feel good for no reason. Try it, the chadanons in Jow Forums are very straight up but also supportive

If you ever think of good old kys: you wouldn't get rid of the pain, but distribute it to everybody around you, starting with your parents, ending with the dude who has to clean up your corpse

Set yourself life goals, do give sports a try (or at least take walks) and try to discover the good things in life, one by one

How much money do you have? I have this rule where if I get so depressed that I want to kill myself, I will move to a different country (I imagine poorer) and live out the rest of my days there. Even if I don't know the language or it's dangerous. Think about it. If you would kill yourself anyway, what would you have to lose?

OP here... Interesting to see that there are quite a few others in a similar situation.

>How much money do you have? I have this rule where if I get so depressed that I want to kill myself, I will move to a different country (I imagine poorer) and live out the rest of my days there. Even if I don't know the language or it's dangerous. Think about it. If you would kill yourself anyway, what would you have to lose?

I don't have a lot of money but enough that I could just move away somewhere like you suggest. Thing is, I am too comfortable to move away. Suicide is not an option for me as I'd be too pussy to do it.

How do l start liking it though? I’ve never enjoyed socializing but have started to find it intolerable lately. I hate everyone and not least myself because of my inability to be social. All l want is to live alone in the wild.

I feel this shit so hard

>If you would kill yourself anyway, what would you have to lose?
Dying horribly?